Turtleboy Investigates

Danielson/Webster “Mom” Arrested After Starving, Toothless, Diapered, 3-5-6 Year Old Children Discovered Living With Child Sex Abuser Boyfriend

A Danielson/Webster Woman was arrested after DCF found her mute, malnourished, dehydrated 3, 5, and 6 year old kids in soiled diapers, living with a kiddie porn enthusiast who was probably sexually abusing them.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Our Facebook page is suspended again, so make sure you to LIKE THE LOST BOYS OF TURTLE Facebook page to keep up with our latest blogs.

Our Facebook page is suspended again, so make sure you to LIKE THE LOST BOYS OF TURTLE Facebook page to keep up with our latest blogs.








Editor’s Note: Usually we do not show images of children on here. However, certain under certain circumstances pictures are the only things that do a story like this justice. To truly understand the horror and depravity of this particular story some images of some parts of the children were necessary. 

Northeastern Connecticut strikes again:

Following a criminal investigation into the situation of three children who had apparently been left in cruel and neglectful conditions at a Danielson address for years, a Massachusetts woman turned herself in to Connecticut State Police today on related charges. Back on July 21st, police say the Eastern District Major Crime Squad (EDMC) assigned to Troop D received a call from the state Department of Children and Families (DCF) office in Willimantic, reporting the neglect of three children located at a Broad Street address in Danielson.

The report indicated that then 32-year-old Donna Rodeheffer – whose current address is listed as being on Main Street in Webster, Massachusetts – along with 24-year-old Nicolas Emory of Danielson, had three neglected juvenile children under their care ages 3, 5 and 6. Police say DCF had received a referral finding that the children were missing many of their teeth, being malnourished, dehydrated, and all three children still in diapers, unable to talk.

The children were taken into the care of DCF, and EDMC conducted a lengthy criminal investigation – detectives finding through family members that the children rarely left the walls of the Danielson residence, and none of the children had ever been enrolled in school. After receiving further medical care, the children were found to be very underweight and “extremely neglected.”

Arrest warrants for both Rodeheffer and Emory were granted, and today Rodeheffer was charged with three counts of risk of injury to a minor and three counts of negligent cruelty to persons. Rodeheffer was held on a court-set $150,000 bond and presented in Danielson Superior Court today – however, police say Emory is currently being held in Arizona as a fugitive from justice based on child pornography-related charges stemming back from an investigation of the Connecticut State Police Computer Crimes Unit. Upon his rendition back to Connecticut, police say Emory will be charged with both the child neglect and child pornography charges.


This is eerily similar to the Blackstone house of horrors from 2014. The only difference is the children are still alive. Thank God.

It appears as if Donna Rodeheffer has deactivated her Facebook page. But we got some screenshots yesterday when we first found out about this story. She posted frequently, including lots of pictures with her kids. Check this one out:


Look at background:


It’s littered with trash, coke cans, and empty liquor bottles. There’s a disgusting mattress on the right. The poor girl is eating a brownie, which is probably her dinner, and her unwashed clothes are covered in brown shit.


Here’s another picture:


Notice the soiled mattress with no sheets. This is what the poor girl’s teeth look like:


Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

See the guy in the background on the laptop? That’s the boyfriend Nicholas Emory,


who is also facing child pornography charges and was recently arrested in Arizona with his kiddie porn enthusiast brothers:



Sweet fucking Jesus. Those three were born to be child predators. Scary shit. Normally we’d laugh and make fun of human garbage like this, but this is so fucked up we can’t even find a way to make it satirical. Of course what’s even scarier is the fact that Nick Emory was living with them and is pictured in a room with the two little girls. According to the police none of the children (as old as 6) can talk. This is a common trait of children who have been sexually abused. This woman let this monster around her children.

The police report says that detectives discovered, “through family members that the children rarely left the walls of the Danielson residence.” Except we saw this post from Donna Rodeheffer in 2015:


It’s almost sad to read that because her kids have probably never been to the doctor or the dentist, and they’re trapped in that shitbum apartment in Danielson in pain. We saw that fellow kiddie porn enthusiast brother Jason Emory told her to “just hang in there” instead of telling her to bring them to the doctor. Probably because he knows that the reason they’re in pain is because his brother Nicholas sexually abused them, and a doctor would report that to the police. Wouldn’t surprise me if uncle Jason and uncle James were diddling them too. So we went to Jason’s Facebook page and found he posted this album in 2014:


Remember what the family told the police: “detectives discovered through family members that the children rarely left the walls of the Danielson residence.”

They “rarely” left the walls of their home. Yet here they are at a family cookout, eating, playing, and hanging out with their creepy jorts wearing uncles Jason



And James




In other words, family members lied to police. And they should all be arrested as well. They saw these kids. They could see that their teeth were rotting and they were malnourished. They could easily find out that these kids were not enrolled in school. They could see that a five year old was still in diapers. They could see that not one of these three kids could talk. They saw all of those things and did nothing. They allowed the likely sexual abuse and insane amounts of neglect to continue.


Or how bout all Donna’s Facebook friends who would say stuff like this when they saw pictures of her malnourished children with rotting teeth:


Adorable? Beatiful kids? So pretty? So cute? Fuck each and every one of these enablers. This is what’s wrong with society – people are too gutless to say the truth because it might offend people. It’s much easier to just toss out meaningless, cliche compliments than it is to do the right thing.

Oh yea, and she apparently has kept a job at Price Chopper:


So my question is, where were the kids when she was at work? Did she leave them at home unsupervised with the child molester? What does he do for work? Oh yea, stupid question. He obviously doesn’t have a job. And you can bet the taxpayers of Connecticut were financing all of this. Sure, the kids go without on Christmas:


But at least Mom gets to eat steak:


It takes an incredibly selfish and fucked up person to watch their kids starve while they eat steak. But she’s the real victim here:


Poor baby, we all feel so bad for you.

She also found the time and resources to go meet some wrestlers in Webster last April:


I bet there were some WINNERS there. Nothing attracts a more sophisticated audience than wrestling expos in Webster.

She’s a great mother though, even ask her:



I pray to God this woman never sees the light of day again. Crimes against children are unforgivable. I love Turtleboy Jr. to the ends of this earth (even though is a royal pain in the ass at least twice a day). The second he was put on earth it was my job to protect him and care for his well-being, which ALWAYS comes before mine, because I brought him into this world and he is my responsibility. Also I love him and think he’s great.  If you wanna be a complete fuck up, then go right ahead. But don’t bring innocent children into your world of debauchery and selfishness. They didn’t do anything wrong. They don’t deserve you. Good job by the neighbors to call DCF. We should all be vigilant about stuff like this. See something, say something.


We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 1.20.12 PM



Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)



Follow us on Twitter and like us on FacebookClick on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store. Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution

90 Comment(s)
  • curious
    June 8, 2017 at 10:54 am

    can we get a follow up story? latest i can find on these scumbags is they had court dates in may. and know for a fact that donna is free and walking the streets of webster daily.

  • anonono
    November 24, 2016 at 9:14 pm

    Her 3, 5 and 6 year children “aren’t into toys anymore?”

    On top of everything else, this screams mother is complicit in abuse/neglect. Your 3-6 year old children aren’t “into toys?”

    WTF?? Well, I guess if they are not getting love, attention, PROTECTION and food from the PERSON WHO GAVE BIRTH TO THEM, that is understandable!

    I hope to GOD that every state that touches this case throws the book at all of these deviants and even more, I PRAY that these children get a good, solid, LOVING home and that they recover and never have to associate with these people again.

    Oh and to all of the MORONS who ever viewed any of these idiots’ Facebook pages and did NOTHING to report any of this, this is on your hands too.

  • Anonymous Tipster
    November 23, 2016 at 9:43 pm

    Back to the Topic at hand:
    This woman is just as nuts as the inbreds up in athol.

  • Fiesty Fan
    November 23, 2016 at 6:29 pm

    C’mon Fiesty show your support for Turtleboy and show us those beautiful yaboo’s.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      November 23, 2016 at 10:01 pm

      Meh… I’m a 35 year old married lady, ain’t nobody wanna see these tits!! I’m smooth though, I’m sure I can get that Blondie who got caught getting laid to do it for TB!!

      • Fiesty Fan
        November 23, 2016 at 11:02 pm

        TB is always getting shit on. This will just be a show of support to boost morale #Titties4Turtleboy.

  • Fiesty Fan
    November 23, 2016 at 5:28 pm

    Hey Fiesty show your support, let’s see your tits for Turtleboy!!

  • BobnMic
    November 23, 2016 at 5:05 pm

    Ok all seriousness and more on my part crazed kidding aside – I will have a ton of family coming over tonight all the way through tomorrow so I sincerely wish all friends and foes a very Happy Thanksgiving no bullshit and I do mean that. We’ll start up the fight on Friday the 25th. This is the part when it is hard to hate me. Peace everybody and I do mean it…

    • BobnMic is a lying SJW
      November 23, 2016 at 5:26 pm

      Choke on the wishbone and die.

      Every Turtle Rider

    • Paul Larson
      November 23, 2016 at 6:31 pm

      A ‘Ton’ of family and I bet that’s just his wife!

  • Party boy
    November 23, 2016 at 3:12 pm

    What a disgusting piece of trailer trash that woman is! Who the fucked can look at her and be like “I want to fuck that”? There’s some sick mother fuckers out there! I’m fucking totally disgusted for those poor kids! There’s nothing I despise more then a scumbag parent!! I hope someone wipes the floor with her UGLY fucking face in jail!!!

    • Carla
      November 23, 2016 at 3:42 pm

      Fuck you Party Boy you dont no nothin but you think you r soooo fuckin smart bvut let me tell you that you mite not think she pretty but alot of people do and she has a good heart and DCF are goin around taking kids from good homes for nothin but to be trouble makers and I bet you never get laid so fuck you!

      • You suck at life
        November 23, 2016 at 3:46 pm

        You think you’re so fuckin smart but can’t find a punctuation mark or spell 2 words in a row correctly.

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 4:05 pm

          Fat thumbs on a small iphone keyboard…

          • Turd Burglestein
            November 23, 2016 at 4:38 pm

            ^^^^^^^^^^^^^Fatass with a tiny dick being a keyboard cunt.

          • BobnMic's Tiny Penis
            November 23, 2016 at 4:51 pm

            I call it a micro peen. Maybe Santa will bring me an electron microscope and a pair of plastic tweezers so I can rub a proper one out. Those metal tweezers are so cold they make it shrink and as you can see I can’t afford any shrinkage.

      • Turd Burglestein
        November 23, 2016 at 4:35 pm

        Do you look anything like that Carla from Cheers? Damn…she was one ugly bitch.

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 4:43 pm

          TURD – GIVE IT A REST….

          • BobnMic's Gaping Anus
            November 23, 2016 at 4:45 pm

            If anything around these here parts needs a rest, it’s my gaping anus.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            November 23, 2016 at 4:49 pm



            Wow, it has a fucking echo, what an anus!

          • Turd Burglestein
            November 23, 2016 at 4:53 pm

            Hey Feisty…I misplaced my keys in there, but if we find them we can drive that X5 right on outta here.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            November 23, 2016 at 5:50 pm

            I threw a boomerang in there and retrieved them…. Start er’ up!!!

          • BobnMic's Gerbil
            November 23, 2016 at 6:24 pm

            Hey guys…I would have gone in there and fetched them for you. I know that tunnel like the back of my left paw. All I ask for in return is some fresh Hartz treats and some clean cedar shavings for my cage. Unless you’d be willing to adopt me and save me from the hell I live through daily.

  • Paul Larson
    November 23, 2016 at 2:56 pm

    “Its a hot skill.” I use hot sand for conditioning my hands. Thousands of times a day!

    • BobnMic
      November 23, 2016 at 3:42 pm

      And I love the way they feel on my bare skin… Uhhhhh… You got me all stirred up…

      You coming over or what? I’ll call Timmy and he’ll wear the Cub Scout uniform again…

      • anonono
        November 24, 2016 at 9:19 pm

        Anybody else getting sick of these trolling pedophilic comments, especially on AN ARTICLE ABOUT CHILD ABUSE?

        • BobnMic
          November 24, 2016 at 10:38 pm

          Add me to that list anonono. This is the price you pay lately when you are a regular commenter…

  • Carla
    November 23, 2016 at 2:53 pm

    You people who dont no them need to shut the fuck up seriously because I no them and they are very nice peeps and great parents who luv there kids and would give there last dime to a frend in need to help them he is not a pedoplile that was a mistake it was his brther who was researching about child porn to protect the kidz an the FBI got it wrong cuz Nick luvs those kidz an would neva hurt them so shut the fuck up.
    They have been having a hard time lately cuz there frend just found out that one of her cats needs an operation and its gonna cost like 8 thousand dollars that she dosnt have but the kids have to be home schooled cuz they have ADHD and the doctor told her that she should give them Vodka sometimes so they can calm down so you dont no them like I do so you should just mind your own business!!

    • You suck at life
      November 23, 2016 at 3:05 pm

      Is this the same cat that ran away, and Stabby McGee and Trap Queen Ho, the car jacking couple helped look for? Of course the FBI got it all wrong, super Cop was researching what child porn looked like so he could be an Avenger… And the doctors are out to get them by saying that they are malnourished and neglected now… And, FYI, homeschooling isn’t just keep them at home and say you’re schooling them, the state checks up on that… they get tested to make sure it’s really happening. If this is the same Carla that was sticking up for those car jackers, you hang with a serious fucked up circle of people.

    • Party boy
      November 23, 2016 at 3:19 pm

      You sound just as stupid as your pig of a friend!!! You think it’s alright to be human excrement??? If so you belong right next to her!! Not to mention learn fucking basic English before you shoot off from your mouth. You sound like a complete moron!! No surprise there though.

    • Party boy
      November 23, 2016 at 3:25 pm

      And please tell us the name of the doctor that says give the vodka? Bet you can’t because you’re a total fucking liar. Just another disgusting piece of shit!!! DIE PLEASE!!!!

      • Dr. Feelgood
        November 23, 2016 at 3:49 pm

        That would be me… Are you questioning my medical expertise? I also recommend car exhaust fumes for insomnia… Works like a charm…

    • anonono
      November 24, 2016 at 9:17 pm

      I am praying that you, like 99% of the commenters above you, are a troll.

    • sunnysweets
      November 25, 2016 at 9:32 am

      Carla, I don’t know your friend, but I’ve seen her at her place of employment an awful lot. She was always very nice to my children and I…which is something that makes this even more shocking. Listen, my kids are homeschooled, not specifically because of ADHD, or any one reason in particular, although a couple of my kids would probably be labeled with that by educators. Here’s the thing, even if your kids have ADHD and are homeschooled, you legally have to make sure your kids were/are learning as much if not more than what they would learn at school. Homeschooling is great for kids with ADHD because you have that extra time with your kids. My kids that would be labeled ADHD actually preform 1-2 years ahead of their given grade. I had actually mentioned to your friend that my kids were homeschooled and she never mentioned that hers were, which is odd since most homeschool families I have met over the last 10 years try to support each other. The state of CT doesn’t require a whole lot to homeschool, but you do have to notify the school district, yet if she was listing her address in Webster, the process is entirely different and would have required a lot more documentation and approval. All of those things would be easily obtained by DCF or Police investigators, yet it has been noted that her kids were never enrolled in school. Vodka as prescribed by the pediatrician?!? Really?? Why would anyone take that kind of advice in 2016? If it’s true, that dr should loose his/her license! There are plenty of dietary and even holistic approaches for ADHD, without going the pharmaceutical route. I’m not going to bash anyone for their kids teeth, however, my youngest has had issues with her teeth from day one, partially genetic and partially from having been on too many antibiotics before she turned a year. Now, while I can’t afford to pay my insanely high deductible on the insurance I pay for every month that costs almost as much as my mortgage to get her into the OR to have them all fixed at once, each pedi dentist I spoke to told me they do 10-12 cases a week…most of them are Masshealth patients. So, while my child might be penalized since her father works his ass off, her kids probably could have all gotten their teeth fixed for nothing. And a cat? Really. $8000 for a cat…you put the cat down and take care of your damn kids! Yeah, we have pets, we love our pets, but they do not take precedence over our children’s well being. If you can’t afford to care for your kids, you shouldn’t even consider having pets. Pets are not a necessity. Not judgement, this is truth.

  • Kenny Powers
    Kenny Powers
    November 23, 2016 at 1:18 pm

    Holy shit after reading all of that I want to light myself on fire…….

    • Uncle Paul Larson
      November 23, 2016 at 2:00 pm

      I once learned self-immolation from the Buddhist monks in Shandong province China. It’s a hot skill. Speaking of Shandong, it rhymes with dong which make me think of dork, the penis of a blue whale. When used as slang, referring to an inept socially awkward (usually) teen… I’m particularly attrated to the dork lifestyle. Dork, when used to refer to a socially awkward or inept person, is a relatively recent word: our records indicate that it first appeared in writing in the 1960s. Two of its synonyms in this sense are likewise of fairly recent vintage. Nerd (typically used of a studious species of dork) dates from the 1950s; it was coined by Dr. Seuss in his 1950 book If I Ran the Zoo, although not in the sense that we use today. Geek became synonymous with nerd in the 1950s. Prior to this, the word referred to, among other things, a carnival performer who would bite the head off a live chicken, or other small animal, as part of an act.

      Uncle Paul Larson

  • MommaH
    November 23, 2016 at 1:01 pm

    Reading these comments almost made me forget what the topic was today.
    I am a mother of two, that’s when my life truly began. It has always been about my kids. My husband and I forgot what it was like to be kidless. Even though they both are in college, they still are our top priority. This shit truly disgusts me and I can’t even fathom the fact that someone could neglect their children this way. She should be locked up in a cell, no mattress, no food, no water, no nothing.

  • Paul Larson
    November 23, 2016 at 12:41 pm

    On topic…

    I bet she’s (Rodeheffer) a DEMOCRAT… Hillary voter. And, the 3 brothers Emory, most definitely DEMOCRAT. Original pedophile, Pete Philia, a GREEK DEMOCRAT in 748 BC, wrote “Philia, a true deep love, in the vein of Eros (Erotic love) and Agape (all consuming love), flows from deep within towards without an all encompassing passion for the pais, or paidos (children) and philia makes me want to feel-ya.” in “Pete’s Pedos, A Blueprint for the Founding of NAMBLA” page 4. Children are SLAVES to their parents, and my agency in the spirit of Lincoln wishes to break the bonds of slavery in any form. Arizona is a safe harbor for the KKK founded by southern DEMOCRATS but relocated to the desert because most of the NAMBLA members have asthma and find a desert climate more soothing. Jeffersonian NAMBLA members, such as BobnMic and myself, prefer the NorthEast climates where Cub Scout uniforms can be worn more year round, even on camping trips. I was trained in Okinawa by the master ropesman, Pais Tees, in the art of nipple coverings and shibari. Skill such as these are handy when restraining petulant tattlers.

    “The Real” Paul Larson aka Uncle Paul

    • BobnMic
      November 23, 2016 at 12:55 pm

      Boy you really go out of your way to be an asshole huh? What was that about an hour of Google search to do what? Be an asshole not funny shit? Get a fucking job you fucking loser or hook up with Fiesty the EBT Latino Queen Wreaky Rican for internet baseball stats in an effort to impress.

      But of course she does not…

      • Uncle Paul Larson
        November 23, 2016 at 1:01 pm

        What an ugly thing to say… Does this mean we are not friends anymore, Bobbie? If I thought you weren’t my friend, I just don’t think that I could bear it!

      • You suck at life
        November 23, 2016 at 1:09 pm

        Oh Bob… I don’t know what’s funnier… that post, or the fact that you think that ANY Googling was needed to write it!

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 1:14 pm

          YSAL – do you think I have a clue. To be honest NO.

    • Paul Larson
      November 23, 2016 at 1:26 pm


      • Paul Larson
        November 23, 2016 at 1:28 pm

        And, I didn’t write THAT!

        • Lars Paulson
          November 23, 2016 at 3:54 pm

          But I did write this.

          • Paul Larson
            November 23, 2016 at 4:00 pm

            Hey Lars…. did you hear about my prestigious award? July 2012 T&G letter of the week!

            It’s a pretty big deal… Got a rosewood pen and everything, so, I’d say it’s pretty serious.

          • Lars Paulson
            November 23, 2016 at 4:23 pm

            Fascinating Paul. Would you like to come over and doodle on my bunghole with it? I’ve never seen a rosewood pen before.

          • Paul Larson
            November 23, 2016 at 4:29 pm

            Not only rosewood… but, get this… ENGRAVED! It came with a letter… Chris Sinacola… signed… in INK!

            They aren’t playing around. I framed the letter… Hung it next to my Senior Center Commendation for giving Marsha Plimpton mouth to mouth resuscitation. I learned CPR from Dr. Heimlich in the Andes.

      • The more you know...
        November 23, 2016 at 1:30 pm

        I didn’t think so… It was far too clever and actually a little on topic.

    • Paul Larson
      November 23, 2016 at 1:28 pm


      • Paul Larson
        November 23, 2016 at 1:29 pm

        Or that…

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 1:55 pm

          PL – this is what is in here now. Nothing but pussies. Military and Police hating pussies. It is fucking disgusting it really is. I get this shit every day I come in here. Every fucking day but the best part is sticking it right back up their fucking asses. Spoiled little pansies these fuckers are all of them.

          The ones that are not so overt and keep quiet are as fucking guilty as those overt as far as I am concerned so fuck all of them. The quiet ones should fucking speak up! Fucking pussy ass bitches. You fuckers would not last one fucking DAY in boot camp let alone a theater of operation…

          • Paul Larson
            November 23, 2016 at 2:52 pm

            I agree completely!

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 3:11 pm

            These pansy fucking troll pussies just piss me off and are ruining this blog. Nice job Fiesty. You brought a great bunch to the party…

          • Counter-Punching Bobbie
            November 23, 2016 at 3:16 pm

            You must like getting pissed… You just keep coming back for more… We are legion Bobbie… There is no Feisty, only Zuul.

            Remember, you asked for this… You couldn’t stop “counter-punching”… Just go away Bobbie… It’ll all be over… Go away…

          • Tarbash the Egyptian Magician
            November 23, 2016 at 3:19 pm

            So everyone is guilty- the overt, the not so over…the whole fucking system is guilty!

            Get a clue: there are no “quiet” ones “that are not so overt”. WE ALL HATE YOU!

            “Fuck all of them”? No, fuck you, Bob!

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 3:20 pm

            Go away? Hahahahahahaha. My mission is to destroy you and yours whatever it takes. You really think you will win over me? Wow. Nice try cupcake…

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 3:24 pm

            No – how about this – FUCK YOU Tarbash dba Fiesty. Does that soothe your soul?

          • Tarbash the Egyptian Magician
            November 23, 2016 at 3:32 pm

            No – how about this – FUCK YOU Bob!

            Are we going to go back and forth like this? I’m cool with that.

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 3:47 pm

            You bet towel head we are going back and forth. Get used to it and read some more of your fucking Koran/Quran fucking bullshit.

          • Tarbash the Egyptian Magician
            November 23, 2016 at 3:58 pm

            Your buddy Larson knows a lot about the “Koran/Quran”. Maybe you should go ask him about it, you racist shit stain.

            Oh, almost forgot- FUCK YOU Bob

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 4:12 pm

          Very offended Tarfucksatin. Very offended. Ya ok…

          • Paul Larson
            November 23, 2016 at 4:21 pm

            In happier news… Did you hear about my major award? T&G People’s Forum Letter of the Week!

            Got a pen for it…

            It’s rosewood… Engraved…


    • Hugh Beaumont
      November 23, 2016 at 1:57 pm

      LOL Now I know where Jimmy Norton got his “Uncle Paul”!

      • BobnMic
        November 23, 2016 at 2:01 pm

        Where are you going with this Hugh?…

        • Uncle Paul
          November 23, 2016 at 2:06 pm

          I know where you want it to go Bobbie… I remember your muthah used to go grocery shopping and I’d babysit for ya… You would giggle and kick when I blew lil bubbles on your bare touchey… You were all like Yay! Let’s play tickle the peeny, Uncle Paul and you’d put on your muthah’s underwear… teedle dee, Bobbie… You were a good boy… Not a tattler…

          • BobnMic's Gaping Anus
            November 23, 2016 at 4:29 pm

            I’m still mad at you Uncle Paul from that time you distracted me with that “Hey look…baby eagles” line and then fisted me right up my cadbury canal without any lube when I looked up. I never did heal up from that properly and still walk with a pronounced limp.

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 4:37 pm

            Anna the Fraudulent Lawyer from allegedly Holden (more like Spencer) – you are fucked up! Seriously fucked up in the brain…

          • Uncle Paul
            November 23, 2016 at 4:37 pm

            But you didn’t tattle… You’re a good boy…

      • Lyle "Chip" Chipperson
        November 23, 2016 at 2:13 pm

        Bobbie will learn… never poke a pest… uh… peckah… tsss

        • BobnMic
          November 23, 2016 at 3:15 pm

          So Turd breath you really think you are all kinds of humorous and shit? Oh damn another Pun…

          • Lucifer Morningstar
            November 23, 2016 at 3:17 pm

            Not Turd… We are legion… Go away Bobbie…

          • BobnMic
            November 23, 2016 at 3:31 pm

            You are nothing until I say you are…

          • Turd Burglestein
            November 23, 2016 at 4:32 pm

            We are all legion. We are all Negan. We are all Turd. And we are all Feisty.

        • BobnMic's Blow Up Wife
          November 23, 2016 at 4:02 pm

          Bob, can you pick up a tire patch kit on your way home from you job as Verizon’s janitor? Paul was using me behind your back again and poked a half inch hole in my anal area. I’m leaking out fast. Hurry home hunny.

          • Paul Larson
            November 23, 2016 at 4:32 pm

            Sorry… I was just admiring my engraved rosewood pen… and the next thing I know… psssssssss

          • BobnMic's Blow Up Wife
            November 23, 2016 at 4:36 pm

            Next time bring duct tape. Protip.

  • BobnMic
    November 23, 2016 at 12:32 pm

    Would it be childish if I said I just farted loudly and the contractor working to fix my dishwasher two rooms over laughed real loud right fucking now? And guess what. The contractor is a woman.

    Slightly embarrassed here. Still fucking laughing however but never the less embarrassed…

    • BobnMic
      November 23, 2016 at 12:38 pm

      Sorry back on topic – these fucking people are fucking ugly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      That’s all I got on this…

      • BobnMic
        November 23, 2016 at 12:46 pm

        Looks like my family reunion… Egads!!

    • shut the fuck up and die
      November 23, 2016 at 12:44 pm

      didn’t know gaping assholes made noise

      • BobnMic's Gaping Anus
        November 23, 2016 at 1:21 pm

        You’d be surprised at the sounds I can make with this thing. Why just last week after the bath house closed, I invited everyone over for a gloryhole party (aren’t I the greatest host?) and well you know how these things can get a little out of hand, well anyways to make a long story short I ended up with a harmonica, a kazoo, and a dog whistle stuck in my wrinkled star. So I’ve got 5 guys pounding me from every direction making all kinds of drum sounds and everytime I queefed it sounded like a 3 piece band playing from inside my fudge tunnel. And the dogs would all start howling because of the whistle. Butt I digress.

        • BobnMic's Gaping Anus
          November 23, 2016 at 1:22 pm

          Whoops…wrong BobnMic

  • The more you know...
    November 23, 2016 at 12:19 pm

    Again… COMPLETELY on topic… Tourettes strikes again!

    Bees have 5 eyes. There are 3 small eyes on the top of a bee’s head and 2 larger ones in front.
    Count the number of cricket chirps in a 15-second period, add 37 to the total, and your result will be very close to the actual outdoor Fahrenheit temperature.
    One-fourth of the world’s population lives on less than $200 a year. Ninety million people survive on less than $75 a year.
    Butterflies taste with their hind feet.
    Only female mosquito’s’ bite and most are attracted to the color blue twice as much as to any other color.
    If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
    It is illegal to hunt camels in the state of Arizona.
    In eighteenth-century English gambling dens, there was an employee whose only job was to swallow the dice if there was a police raid.
    There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
    The human tongue tastes bitter things with the taste buds toward the back. Salty and pungent flavors are tasted in the middle of the tongue, sweet flavors at the tip!
    The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley’s gum.

    • Paul Larson
      November 23, 2016 at 2:03 pm

      Here is a letter and a rosewood engraved pen I found:

      Worcester Telegram & Gazette

      Dear Mr. Larson,

      July 2, 2012


      Your letter to The People’s Forum has been selected as the Letter of the Week.
      Your engraved rosewood Telegram & Gazette Letter of the Week pen is enclosed. We hope you enjoy it.

      Chris Sinacola
      Editor of the Editorial Pages

      Of course now the T&G is just an apologist for the undemocratic Democratic Party!

      Paul Larson

      • Star-struck
        November 23, 2016 at 2:10 pm

        Shit… You’re THAT Paul Larson!?! The one that wrote that letter to the editor that the TnG loved so much they sent you a pen, Paul Larson?!?!

        Never heard of her…

      • Sargeant Hulka
        November 23, 2016 at 3:33 pm

        That’s pretty fucking impressive… I mean… The T&G!! That lined literally hundreds on bird cages throughout central MA!! And letter of the week… They’re was only 52 of them given out in 2012. And you were one of them… Out-fucking-standing!

  • Paul Larson
    November 23, 2016 at 12:12 pm

    Future History

    I graduated from Wachusett Regional High School in 1966. I just went to my 50th class reunion. My REAL name is PAUL LARSON. You obviously don’t know what you are talking about. If you want to check out the 1966 Wachusett Year Book, I am on page 48, and I listed political affairs and the Marines as my goals. By the way, if you want to see another picture of me on the front page of the Wachusett News Recorder news paper for May 8, 1972, volume 24, Number 19. Also, if you want to see my real name, I brought a Federal Civil Rights case against local and State police. The Docket number was Civil Action # 71-1675-W. You can look it up at Federal Court in Boston. I also ran for selectman twice following my Civil Rights case. Of course, only Democrats voted for me, because I was upsetting the Republican dominants in town.

    By the way, I have the guts to use my real name and you, Future History, do not.

    Paul Larson

    • Mayor Joe Petty
      November 23, 2016 at 12:30 pm

      I should hire you to be my press secretary. They’ll ask questions like “why aren’t the roads plowed?” and the answer will be a long dribble about american slave history. It’s a platform for your nonsense and I can hide from scary reporters. Everyone wins!

    • Mike Hunt
      November 23, 2016 at 3:19 pm

      Hey old man Larson, dont you have an early bird special to get to or something?

Comment on this Post


Who Are Worcester’s Top 5 DUI (OUI) Attorney’s?
Best Show Of All Time: True Detective, House Of Cards, The Wire, Sopranos, Or Breaking Bad?
I Figured Out What Happens To Tony Soprano In Final Scene But It Still Sucks; Here Are The Top 10 Funniest Scenes In Sopranos History