This is the most amazing story I’ve ever heard.
Fox 61: Six people ranging in age from 62 to 85 face sex charges after being arrested in a conservation area in Connecticut. Police say the six, five men and an 85-year-old woman, were involved in lewd and sexual activity in the Grace Richardson Conservation Area in Fairfield earlier this month. Police say the area was being publicized on the internet as an area for people to meet and have sex. Police say they set up surveillance in the area and observed several violations. Those arrested face charges ranging from breach of peace to public indecency. They were released on promises to appear in court. Arrested were Daniel Dobbins, 67; Otto D. Williams, 62; Charles L. Ardito, 75; John Linartz, 62; Richard Butler, 82 and his wife Joyce Butler, 85.
Word on the street is they were filming a porno – Debbie Does Dementia. Or maybe they she thought she was going out for a burger at Five Guys, only to find out that she was there to get drilled by five guys instead.
Just look at these glorious geriatrics.
Just the thought of this guy having a functioning porridge gun…..
Gotta love science. We should be celebrating modern medicine that allows this to be humanly possible at this age. I’m not even mad at them, that’s impressive. And Richard Butler sure is a sport for letting these guys eiffel tower his wife in a public park at the age of 85. They’re partying like it’s 1899 baby! Golden Girls gone wild!!
According to the cops they knew something was up when they saw a bunch of condom wrappers at the park and set up surveillance. That’s the only part that upsets me – if you’re this old then why the hell are you wearing Jimmy hats? She worried about getting pregnant? I gotta assume the best part about old people sex is the lack of consequences.
But in a twist Dick and Joyce Butler are saying they dindu nuffin….
An octogenarian couple — charged in a sex sting at a town park — say they are innocent of any lewd behavior. Joyce Butler, 85, and her husband Richard, 82, were arrested last week on breach of peace charges at the Grace Richardson Conservation Area. Four other people were also charged with breach of peace; two of those had an added charge of public indecency.
“We were just sitting there and we just got caught in what was going on,” Joyce Butler told TSG. “And they (the police) were perfectly all wrong. There was nothing going on at all.
“We’ve gone there for years. We used to take the children to go find golf balls years ago when they were little.” The 87-acre park is adjacent to a public golf course.
Well, that settles that. They used to take their children golfing at that park before their kids got drafted into World War 2, therefore they couldn’t have possibly turned Nana into an AARP dick cushion.
Gramps was more specific.
“I haven’t had sex in maybe, 10 years. I got no blood flow. I got three doctors that would back me up.
He got no blood flow!! Oh my God, that’s the greatest thing I’ve ever read in my life. Can we PLEASE get them on the Live show? We totes believe you Papa Punani Driver. And even if he’s being honest, the fact that he had sex at the age of 72 is equally as impressive.
My question is, did the cops actually see penetration? Without that it seems like this one’s gonna be tough to prove, so I’m team free muh boi on this one until I see that.
P.S. If this is against the law then how come the Ashland State Park Porridge Pumper wasn’t arrested for getting plowed on a picnic table in a video that was uploaded to Pornhub?
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51 Comment(s)
quick question her hubby waz there too doing it or watching?
we all need loving,TLC
Asked her hubby what 85 yo pussy tastes like and he said ‘Depends…”
Like putting a marshmallow in a parking meter
Rumor has it that Viagra sales spiked in CT in the preceding days.
All kidding aside, STDs don’t care how old you are. No excuse for ignorance; do some research on the increased rate of STDs among the senior population. No glove, no love!
Gang bang at the old folks home.
Must smell amazing.
so true im guessing she cant get pregnant shes 85 you 100% rigth
Please tell me it was Candy Samples.
boys will be boys…
I’m guessing that this is a gay cruising spot & the woman was innocently caught up in this. Her husband probably parked there & went into the woods to meet up with these other trolls & the police came & busted all of them. The poor dear probably had no idea her husband was in the woods sucking dick while she was hanging out looking at the birds.
I heard she has an original tramp stamp done by Cranach the Elder of Saxony.
Not all heroines wear capes.
I bet she gives a mean gummer.
85 is the new 45. Some 85 yo’s are smoking hot.
If your 85 and doing five dudes you should get a medal,a key to the city and a parade.Holy crap she is awesome.
Where exactly is the Grace Richardson Conservation Area? How long of a ride is that from Cambridge?
It took me minute. Hilarious comment. Many thumbs up.
Im just concerned for the economy. After these arrests the sales of Viagra plummeted which will definitely affect the big pharma crooks. Did granny cut out a glory hole in her Depends? Was she taking three at a time? Ill bet if one of these old dudes were to reach orgasm, dust would ‘cum’ out. Looks like I picked the wrong night to not drink….fuuuuudddddggggge!
By the way I wanna see the mugshot of the old bat, feel like punchin da clown on a friday nite. PARTY TIME!
I’m a senior citizen and my plumbing still works, I don’t see what you think is so funny, especially you fukkin millennials. Frank “RIGID” Rizzo
Lol Now that’s what I call “DRIVING MISS DAISY” lmfao.
Arrested they should receive a commendation
LOL dindu ape porch monkey slut! Why did these goes wanna get down with the brown anyway?
They better check themselves for ticks. This is no joke. Lyme disease sucks. (rolls eyes)
My first thought was, why didn’t they just go to their house where they would be safe and not get caught? Old people, gotta love ’em
The last time I pulled my pants down in front of an old lady my Grandmother said “Phinneous it’s 2019 I do wish you would get a job and move out on your own, maybe meet a girl”.
Fuck you,
Finn
Amazing that anyone at all was arrested here.
Let’s not go after Hadassah for code violations, fire hazards, and general ratchetry; let’s bust some old folks for still enjoying the old ‘in out’
Like she’s going to get pregnant and have a kid on welfare. unlike the slobs we read about here every day
What a fucked up legal system…..
I just had to take time out for a holiday Limerick of the Day for this story…..
A confused, old dear from Holyoke,
Offered five aging men a good poke,
They pulled off her pants
Fucked her into a trance
Then shat in her shoe for a joke….
Dick Scratcher, aged 81 and still willing
Thanks DS – relax and enjoy!
Amazing! The last line killed me!
Holy Shiite, that was fucking brilliant . Thanks for the laugh mate
Oh 85 I thought I heard 8 year old. What am I gonna do without Epstein?
Where’s the pics of the lady? Do they show her tits and grey haired cunt?
This would make sense in Boston. Rachel Rollins has prevented cops from enforcing laws against pretty much everything but this. Ambitious cops looking to move up the ranks have to do something to make an arrest that will stick (no pun intended).
But Fairfield, CT? That was once an affluent town. A methadone mile in Fairfield. Connecticut must be in worse shape than reported.
Turtleboy should do some research. The STD rate in the elderly is out of control thsnks to Boomers. Nursing home sex is prevalent in most nursing homes and the CDC says elderly STD infections are increasing.
Our country is being invaded and we are worried about an 85 year old who still gets wet years after menopause.
The DOJ just published numbers that showed that NONCITIZENS ACCOUNTED FOR 64% of All FEDERAL ARRESTS.
THATS 64%.
8% of Federal arrests of non citizens in 2018 were for immigration offenses.
Trump is right. They are not bringing their best. They are criminals and they are not assimilating.
Everday our country is being taken over by Third World TRASH.
…Like playing pool with a piece of rope
HA HA! Good one!!!
Otto looks a little…jaundiced.
Elder- porn is haut. ……….do the elderly. But they do love posting things to their “wall” with thumbtacks.
Meh. Victimless “crime”.
Good for them.
I hope I’m having fun at that age.
Ah North Shore you’re killing me!
“They’re partying like it’s 1899 baby! Golden Girls gone wild!!”
Thanks for giving me a good laugh today!
“AARP dick cushion” made me LOL.
Hey how come I wasnt invited ?
This is very funny. Imagine all the dust coming from those genitalia. Must have looked like a sand storm
You ever try to peel apart a grilled cheese?
I for one am relieved to not have been within a quarter mile radius. The musty aroma.
No photos of the couple who put the party on?
The husband is the pimp, the wife is the whore, but let’s just release photos of the the Johns.
What I want to know, does Joyce have a tramp stamp and does she have tats above each nipple that say hot and cold?
Also, does Joyce take it up the ass? Askin’ for a friend.
I dont know if she takes it up the ass but I sure do big boy.
Lets meet in CT