First Post All-Star Boston Red Sox Fuck Up Comes From Cheating Ball Girl

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The Boston Red Sox are back in action today, ready to put on the greatest second half comeback in the history of sports. For the Sox to make this historic push they’re gonna need all the help they can get. Tonight it was the ball girl who pulled the inadvertent second half boner in a failed attempt to keep the Kansas City Royals from breaking the 1-1 deadlock in the top of the fourth inning:

This poor girl. Makes the nifty play only to find out she just completely fucked up. Let’s take a look at how this played out after she made the grab.

First she has textbook Tom Emansky form while putting herself in position to make the play on the ball which was just ruled fair


The ball takes an unfortunate hop, but she uses the whole body to make sure she keeps control over it


After making this tremendous play and feeling on top of the world she now looks for a young spoiled child from Brookline with front row seats whom she can give it to.


Unfortunately for her the fans are all telling her that the ball was ruled fair and that she has in fact fucked up badly.

Now is the moment of panic – a ball girl’s worst nightmare. “What I do” she’s thinking? Do I give it to someone in the crowd anyway since the ball is now dead? Do I hold onto the ball and bow my head in shame? Nah fuck that. I’ll just drop it quietly on the ground and walk away like nothing happened.



Then I’ll quietly move on over to my Benjamin Moore paint bucket and pretend like I am trying to take a Royal smash. They’ll never know it was me who interfered with the ball!!


Unfortunately for her Royals’ manager saw the whole thing go down.

“Wait a minute…”


“Something’s not right here…”


The ball girl was doing her part to keep a low profile. She started off with the not paying attention face.

Bs3fDtKIIAEOKG6.jpg-largeBut the jig was up. Ned Yost had cracked the case and was onto her tomfoolery. Since she knew she was obviously busted she went with the, “Whoops, well this is awkward” face. 
Bs3fBXKIgAENmoB.jpg-largeYost was all pissy because it was ruled a ground rule double. Fenway has some weird angles over there so arguably this could’ve turned into a triple. At the same time it very easily could’ve been a single. Either way it didn’t end up mattering because there were men on base and Clay Buchholz was pitching so they were gonna end up scoring anyway.

Fuck Derek Jeter – I tip my hat to this girl. At least someone around here is coming up with creative ways to try to win games.

Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.

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