WTF

Grandma Mimosa Almost Kidnapped By Guy Walking Dogs In Maine But Is Courageous Enough To Make YouTube Video Of Herself Having A Good Time Instead Of Calling The Cops

 

This is Varvara Harmon, a hiker and artist from Maine.

She recently posted about a harrowing ordeal she barely survived during her morning hike in a hiking Facebook group.

The Pumpkin Spice Mafia is no longer restricted to Target and Walmart. They’re climbing mountains now.

Just to review:

  • She was parked on a road taking pictures of New Hampshire’s beauty when a truck traveling in the opposite direction suddenly turned around and parked behind her
  • She started driving away, he followed her, and despite being elderly and in the middle of nowhere she was able to lose him
  • After ditching the driver she parked her car on a dirt road and started walking towards the trail, when out of nowhere the driver found her again and stopped his vehicle
  • She turned directions and instead of getting into her car and going to the police she began running towards a different trail where she saw another hiker, hoping that as an elderly woman she could outrun a man and catch up to the hiker before getting kidnapped
  • The guy starts following her with dogs, presumably to smell her in case she tried to hide, and ran after her for nearly a mile
  • She finally reached the hiker just in time and the kidnapper was never seen again
  • Despite surviving this harrowing ordeal she went on to hang out with the other hiker and produce this spirited and happy video to YouTube, which no one would’ve seen if she didn’t make this post

Of course what any normal person would take from this story is that she saw a guy in a truck with dogs that he ended up taking for a walk in the woods. Besides that pretty much nothing happened except for the shit she was imagining in her head. Nevertheless it’s been shared far and wide and she’s getting exactly what she wanted – thots and shares.

 

Some suggested that her story sounded like she mistook the guy for a bear hunter, but she wasn’t trying to hear that and neither was the Pumpkin Spice Mafia.

Others began asking the same questions I did.

“Some people are really damn courageous and push through adversity.”

And that right there is exactly why people like this lie. Because they want strangers on Facebook to tell them how courageous they are for going for a hike in the woods. Watch the video she posted again. The lady can’t stop smiling and having a great time climbing rocks. This happened right after she was nearly kidnapped by a guy who was stalking her with dogs for no particular reason. A guy who suddenly decided to quit and couldn’t catch up to an elderly woman after a mile. Sounds legit.

Finally she just cut off the comments once too many people started realizing that she was completely full of shit.

We are living in a world where people LOVE to live in fear. Think about it. They convinced everyone to tank the economy and hide in our homes because a virus exists with a 99.8% survival rate. They tell us that we’re gonna kill each other if we don’t wear masks. They get tech companies to silence anyone sharing positive or optimistic information, like pointing out that the flu is just as deadly as commie cold. Now people who wanna go outside and live their lives will be scared to do so because of posts like this. And people believe it because they WANT to believe it. Somewhere along the line we have become a nation of cowards that is afraid to live life and would rather virtue signal for likes on Facebook from the safety of our homes. Pathetic.

 

Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:




Follow us on Youtube, SoundCloud, Twitter, and Facebook.

Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 

 

42 Comment(s)
  • Not Betty white
    October 11, 2020 at 4:22 am

    There needs to be an age limit on posting on social media. There’s enough batshit out there these days now we are flooded with onset dementia patients spreading their long winded paranoia stories. We are fucked.

  • Caravaggio's Old Skin Mags
    October 10, 2020 at 7:03 am

    It usually comes down to the same thing. There is no Mr. Harmon. This broad was probably decent looking in her youth and got some attention. Now, none. She just needs a good seeing to. That’s the problem with most woke women. Deep inside they just want a man to give it to them good and hard.

    Call me sexist but you know it’s true.

  • "Big" Jeff "erson" Dick
    October 9, 2020 at 5:04 pm

    I’d definitely take a walk down the trail in Jefferson with her an bang her on Tbs old couch in the basement an let him watch in the corner. Definitely.

  • North of the Border
    October 9, 2020 at 4:02 pm

    She’s from Maine but supposed6this happened in NH. Cause that way nobody can check with her local po-po, and when asked what town she was in, she can always claim she didn’t know or forgot.

    Just another bouncy tale, straight from the warped pages of Democratic Underground.

  • Too far
    October 9, 2020 at 1:49 pm

    This is a shitty post Unc. You have no idea what happened to this woman. My sister was raped and after calling t he cops, she went jogging. You can never understand what goes through the mind of someone in a dangerous situation.

  • attentionseeker101
    October 9, 2020 at 9:10 am

    What a disgusting old bitch. Nothing more cowardly than making up a fake story to manipulate people into sympathizing with you whilst advertising social media. Why can’t all these psychotic liberals lock themselves together in one spot with their masks and hazmat suits while the rest of us get on with our lives without interruption? Is that too much to ask?

  • ANGRY GIANT
    October 8, 2020 at 10:20 pm

    Was she wearing a mask in the forest??? Maybe the man was a liberal who was seeking to shame her for being maskless….

    • Jerry Garcia’s Ghost
      October 9, 2020 at 7:47 am

      Pot is way more potent now than in the 1960’s.

  • Ralph Cramden
    October 8, 2020 at 9:12 pm

    I too have had it with these attention seeking losers. This was clearly nothing more than a concoction to gain sympathy and traffic to you site. These people make me sick.

  • Just a guy with a lost dog
    October 8, 2020 at 7:55 pm

    It’s astonishing her brain immediately goes to kidnapping, rape and murder. I mean it could have just as easily been some guy who’s dog got lost so he tried asking the first person he found. Shame on you lady and your “society” of spineless dirty douches.

  • I. Wood Banger
    October 8, 2020 at 7:52 pm

    She’s a total GILF. I’ll bet her vag tastes like cotton candy. I might forget to remove the ball gag though. Wouldn’t want her flapping her gums afterward.

  • Elegant Elliot Offen
    October 8, 2020 at 7:44 pm

    Too bad the rock outcropping did not pull a Old Man of The Mountain
    and collapse.

  • Osiris
    October 8, 2020 at 7:08 pm

    Great article Tb I love ya. You should investigate this old bag and her stupid family so we can let her know what a cunt of a Grandma we really think she is. Keep up the good work.

  • Guinea Geisha
    October 8, 2020 at 5:52 pm

    Perhaps granny would feel safer staying home eating trail mix. It’s like M&M’s with obstacles.

  • The angry taint
    October 8, 2020 at 4:29 pm

    there it is again, the graying liz warren hair do. the liberal maniac bulls hats.

  • bston1775
    Clear points
    October 8, 2020 at 4:13 pm

    So high probability a normal guy passed by a woman pulled on to the shoulder and thought “car trouble” so maybe he might help. So he turns around and as he stops she jumps into her car and takes off. So now he proceeds onward, looking for a trail, maybe he goes to 1 before stopping back at another. Dude takes his dogs for a walk, all the while unaware some libtard has conjured an alarmist, by all accounts insanely delusional theory of being chased by a kidnapper who in a first of first, uses the ever so stealthy “dogs” to track his victim… stop… idiots!!! What’s more probably, that or there’s a kidnapper employing dogs to track victims over a mile???? People genuinely suck these days, and have to claim victim status to feel relevant….

    • ElJefe72
      October 8, 2020 at 6:26 pm

      People have always sucked. Social media simply gives them a virtual megaphone.

  • This shouldn't be on here
    October 8, 2020 at 3:50 pm

    Some Grandma in Maine puts something on her facebook that you don’t believe so you call her a drunk and put her on here. Hope she sues you for deformation. Save your ammo for the ratchets.

    • URA Moron
      October 9, 2020 at 7:50 am

      She passed the ratchet line when she posted the story on faceshit trolling for thots and shares.
      Are you just stupid?

  • Jordis Brown
    October 8, 2020 at 2:44 pm

    If its the truth she’s a horrible human being, if its a lie she STILL is a horrible human being.
    If this happened and she didn’t call the police right away she was complacent to a evil man hunting down women.

    I hike often and sometimes by myself. I bring this thing called a gun. Or I bring my Dogo Argentino. Both super handy.

    I dont wake up trying to imagine how to be a victim that day.

  • Done with this shit
    October 8, 2020 at 2:28 pm

    So there’ a potential stalker/ kidnapper/ rapist and his attack dogs roaming the trails and she managed to out-run them. Why wait til much later to notify police? Isn’t that taking a big chance that this band of felons would have found another victim? I call bullshit. Bet the police did too.

  • Maine Joke
    October 8, 2020 at 2:25 pm

    Young Varvara asked Daddy for the keys to his pickup truck once. Daddy said you want my keys you’ll have to suck my d**k. Varvara put it her mouth and said “daddy your d**k tastes like shit! Daddy said “oh i forgot your brother has the truck tonight…

  • She’s kinda a gilf
    October 8, 2020 at 2:19 pm

    She’s kinda a gilf. Not super hot but if she was willing I’d let her ride me. Bet she is a feminist Nazi cunt though.

  • Dr Wu
    October 8, 2020 at 2:17 pm

    HEY!!
    She forgot about the part where the guy was wearing a MAGA hat and his truck had confederate flags on it!!
    Now I KNOW it’s not true!!

  • So easy a caveman can do it
    October 8, 2020 at 2:17 pm

    Cavemen had it right. When you Wana dump your load grab a willing bitch by the hair. Pull her in your cave. Bend her over and dump your load inside her cunt. When your done getting your rocks off kick her ass out of the cave pussy still dripping from your cum.

  • Disco Inferno
    October 8, 2020 at 2:09 pm

    Society is ruled by women now. Look at the characteristics they all find so terribly “stereotypical” and you can’t deny that those same characteristics are now celebrated as virtues: fearful, hysterical, indecisive, overwrought, irrational, subjective, squishy. It used to be “a woman’s prerogative” to change her mind. Now it’s a woman’s prerogative to change ours. And all they can do is talk about how “brave” they are. Bullshit.

  • Old Tom Morris
    October 8, 2020 at 2:05 pm

    She’s a cutie. Would!

  • Taint Smasher
    October 8, 2020 at 1:54 pm

    That’s why you hike with a 44 magnum strapped across your chest. Good for 2 legged and 4 legged critters.

  • bloop
    October 8, 2020 at 1:52 pm

    How scary! I hope she brought an extra pair of Depends!!! The longer the post the bigger the lie.

  • Max Narcissist
    October 8, 2020 at 1:49 pm

    When is her apartment at Spinster Arms going to be ready for move-in?

  • Dan
    October 8, 2020 at 1:21 pm

    Be careful y’all there are old ass kooks fucking chasing hikers around with attention seeking stories.

  • Gretchen Whitmer
    October 8, 2020 at 1:18 pm

    Kidnapping is pretty fucking real, watch your step people.

    • Sleepy Joe Biden
      October 10, 2020 at 2:51 pm

      Yes, very true Gretchen. I believe Trump is behind this one too. I’ll call in some favors and have the Feds investigate. Oh wait, the only people that owe me things are Ukraine, China, and Russian Oligarks.

  • You Suck
    October 8, 2020 at 1:18 pm

    To bad she didn’t end up like that girl who was killed jogging in Princeton right TB.
    It doesn’t matter what you think happened all that matters is this is her story and what she perceived. You don’t have to worry about anything like this happening to you because you never leave your fucking basement. Why are you trying to somehow shame this old lady? Are you honestly that low of a snake?

    • DudeRanchStripClub
      October 8, 2020 at 1:35 pm

      Shut up, queer.

    • Sunioj
      October 8, 2020 at 2:03 pm

      Um the jogger in princeton was hot. The perpetrator was brown…so how do you suppose granny outlasted a male and his dogs for a mile? Oh you dont because it wouldnt ever happen. They would’ve caught her within a 10th of a mile retard

    • TRUMP PENCE 2020
      October 8, 2020 at 2:20 pm

      Yeah well you will NEVER see this happen in more rural areas. Every time someone gets assaulted on a trail it’s 100% brownies who do it, hood rats from the city.

      This is the problem with our country. These females want to corrupt the good name of our country and people. And by people I mean good, honest people of European stock. The original Americans. Who share the same values and work ethic.
      MAWA.
      Make America White Again. Make America Winners Again.

  • DudeRanchStripClub (me/mine pronouns)
    October 8, 2020 at 1:13 pm

    She’s a painter, not an artist.

  • BucketNutz
    BucketNutz
    October 8, 2020 at 1:00 pm

    She’s got a particularly annoying, Mainiac sentagraph writing style.
    “One ‘Flue’ Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” methinks…..

  • Josh
    October 8, 2020 at 12:58 pm

    she just wants to keep other chicks away from the trail. More room for herself. That simple.

  • Damn
    October 8, 2020 at 12:56 pm

    Did you read any other exciting news from Maine online today?

    Please keep us updated.

  • Picasso
    October 8, 2020 at 12:49 pm

    Var Var Voom. Grandma is hot. I’d love to paint her in jizz.

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
This Truck Driver Was Really, Really Pissed About The 65 Car Accident Pile Up On 290 In Worcester.
Chinese Guy Jumps Seven Floors To His Death To Get Out Of Shopping With Girlfriend
South African Dude Who Pretended To Sign Language Obama’s Nelson Mandela Speech Is Apparently An Insane Murdering Rapist?