Just Like We Called It: The Homeless Guy In The Gas GoFundMe Scam Was In On It, And If You Donated To Them Like An Idiot You Deserve To Lose Your Money

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Fox NewsA New Jersey couple and a homeless Philadelphia man who were once the symbol of generosity in hard times allegedly conspired with each other to come up with a false story to earn GoFundMe donations and will now face charges, according to a complaint obtained by NBC 10 Philadelphia. The original story was this: Johnny Bobbitt, who was homeless, gave his last $20 to Kate McClure, a stranded motorist in Philadelphia in November last year, to help her get gas. To thank him, McClure, 28, and her boyfriend, Mark D’Amico, 39, created a GoFundMe account to raise funds for Bobbitt. Around 14,000 people donated to the campaign, which brought in more than $400,000 overall.

“They went on shopping sprees,” Promislo told the paper. “[Bobbitt] tells me they had a Louis Vuitton bag and Chanel sunglasses, a new iPhone 10.”

But the couple claimed they withheld the money to help Bobbitt. They said once the money came in, Bobbitt began to give some to relatives and spend it on drugs. He ultimately received roughly $75,000 from the GoFundMe, which he used to purchase a camper and SUV — both of which he no longer has, reports said. D’Amico claimed in August that he controls the funds and that he would dispense the money when Bobbitt gets a job and stops using drugs. Police had raided the couple’s New Jersey home in September, confiscating a new BMW, jewelry and cash, NBC 10 reported.

I’m gonna give you a quote from August 27, 2018 and you tell me who published these words:

Here’s what probably happened. They were all in on this together. Obviously Mark D’Amico is a swamp maggot with Google trophies up the wazoo. They told this homeless guy, “Let’s say you gave us your last $20 when we ran out of gas, everyone will feel bad for you, and we’ll all cash in on the GoFundMe together.”

He was like, “sure, why not? I’m homeless, da fuq do I have to lose?” 

And it worked out better than any of them could’ve imagined.

The problem arose when reality sent in. Bootleg Kevin Federline and realized that the guy they partnered was indeed a junkbox who wanted to have a $400,000 crack giveaway party. The plan was to split the cash, but he felt bad since he’d just be feeding this guy’s habit. So instead of buying him a house they bought him a camper which they put on their property, and that turned into a nightmare because he sat in it all day, got high, and made sweet, sweet love to himself.

Finally the homeless dude said, “Fuck it, I’m going to give handies under the bridge for crack money since these chiselers aren’t giving me what they promised.” And here we are.

That would be Turtleboy folks.

This is why you come to Turtleboy. Because our instincts are impeccable, and we are the only media outlet that isn’t afraid to make a bold but obvious prediction that goes against the acceptable norms civilized society has arbitrarily created. All these sheep were blaming D’Amico and McClure for ripping off a poor homeless veteran and treating Bobbitt like he was some sort of victim. Not one of these lemmings bothered to ask themselves these questions:

Why does a homeless guy have $20 on him?

What kind of homeless guy gives that money to two strangers for gas money instead of on food, alcohol, or the new testers from Diego?

If they ran out of gas then they only needed half a gallon of gas to get to the gas station, so why did he spend $20 on gas? 

How did he transport $20 worth of gas from the gas station to the car? That’s at least 5 gallons of gas, and would be extremely heavy.

Why did he have a 5 gallon gas can in the first place?

Why was a homeless guy randomly sitting right there on a highway when they ran out of gas? 

Use your brain folks. It’s OK to question things to seem too good to be true. People will call you mean and say things like, “What is wrong with you?” But at the end of the day you’re right and they’re wrong, and the truth is the only thing that matters.

The biggest mistake bootleg George Clooney and his wife made was partnering with a junkie. It could’ve worked out if they had just given him $100,000 and let him spend it on whatever he wanted. But instead they actually cared about what happened to him and didn’t want to contribute to his drug habits. When you do that to a junkie they get mad. That’s why bootleg George Clooney wrote him this text message after Junkbox Johnny started opening his big mouth:

You should’ve done that to begin with idiot. Write him a check and walk away. If he dies, he dies. Not your problem.

I have two points to make here.

  1. I don’t think any of them should be arrested. No one made anyone donate to them. The second I saw this I immediately knew it was a scam and chose not to donate. If you were dumb enough to not ask questions and blindly gave your money to an obvious scam, then that money wasn’t meant for you. This was not a registered charity with any oversight. It was two strangers on the Internet with a tall tale. That money was never your’s to begin with, and it was only a matter of time until you blew it on something stupid. These people earned that money by using GoFundMe to exploit stupid people. So quit whining about stupid you were, because we told you this was a scam and you donated anyway like a dumbass.
  2. A lot of people are saying GoFundMe should be shut down too, which is equally as stupid. This is like how Congress is blaming Trump’s election on Facebook, and how SJWs are blaming the Pittsburgh shooting on Gab. These tech companies should be neutral platforms where free speech takes place. They should not be held responsible for the speech that happens on their platform. We should not be encouraging ANY tech company to be more proactive in taking down content on their site. When that happens you get the mass censorship that we see today on Facebook and Twitter. If you see something illegal happening on one of these platforms then call the cops and have the person doing the illegal things arrested.

This is why you come to Turtleboy. Because our takes are hot and bold, we’re not afraid to take a controversial position, we’re almost always right, and we report real news years before the mainstream media does.

16 Comment(s)
  • Judge dread
    November 16, 2018 at 7:11 pm

    I saw this on the daily wire and I was like yo- TBS called this shit out months ago. Amazing. The TBS staff are so far ahead of it. Congrats.

  • DJ
    November 16, 2018 at 5:16 pm

    If you are dumb enough to give someone pan handling for money, then you should not get it back when its a confirmed scam. Sorry but gofundme is a joke.. Its just one scam after another. I honestly would not give someone I don’t know another a single dime just because they beg for it. Fuck that, take care of your own shit…

  • Don Hayshun
    November 16, 2018 at 2:39 pm

    Go Fund Me is the biggest grift going among the dirt-bag constituency of this country. Anybody who willingly hands over their money to “causes” like this should be met with the utmost scorn and ridicule.

  • Michael Cadena
    November 16, 2018 at 7:51 am

    Go Fund Me Scam 101: You have to believe the lies you tell. Once they become your reality then you can never get caught.
    Go Fund Me Scam 102: Deny, deny, deny. Play the victim and take it to your grave.


  • WeAreFukd
    November 15, 2018 at 8:06 pm

    GFM is ruined. Now where can I go to get my 1st, last, & security so my 4 kids (all who have autism) can have a place to stay while my baby daddy is incarcerated.

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    November 15, 2018 at 4:59 pm

    I love it. I knew it all along. The pics of trips with matching new clothes were the tip off.

    Wanna be yuppies will do anything to be yuppies. How’s all that luxury shopping and materialism making you feel now you fools?

    I’ll never give to gofund me.

  • Maggie the Cat
    November 15, 2018 at 12:47 pm

    Seems to me that every single Go Fund Me plea is a scam. It will only stop when suckers stop funding them.

  • Bill Clinton
    November 15, 2018 at 12:21 pm

    for her crimes Kate McClure should be required to ride my cock daily.

  • bigdaddy
    Kevin Cullen
    November 15, 2018 at 11:45 am

    Thats a story I would have been proud of writing

  • vic1
    November 15, 2018 at 11:32 am

    I would spend my last $20 bucks on her for sure – she looks like she would make me last a long time

  • itsjustme
    November 15, 2018 at 11:15 am

    I agree with everything you wrote except 1. I don’t think the couple didn’t pay him because they felt bad. I think they wanted to control the money and not give him his full amount they agreed on. 2. Of course they should be charged. They should be forced to return every dime they stole.

    Also, that text was sent after they were sued by the guy, after all the money was spent by the couple, how fuck are they supposed to pay him then when they already spent it all?

  • Crispy C
    Principal Rooney
    November 15, 2018 at 10:41 am

    I think with GoFundMe donations it is wise to adopt a Principal Rooney policy: someone has to die and I want proof of that so roll their bones right in here so I can see proof. Maybe a legitimate and verified death without a body will suffice. Honestly I don’t plan on donating to these things ever even with dead people involved.

  • Robert Guiscard, King of Sicily
    November 15, 2018 at 10:33 am

    Looks like / the Globe is biting big on that anti-Mussleman thing. Only a matter of time until that one goes down in flames, too.

  • Turtz McGurtz
    November 15, 2018 at 10:16 am

    Take a well-earned victory lap!

  • deflateddoritodinks
    November 15, 2018 at 10:05 am

    I had no idea that was illegal. Dumb people don’t deserve protection.

  • confucious
    November 15, 2018 at 10:00 am

    Th sound of one hand clapping…

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