Hoodrat Heroes

Lawsuit Of The Day: Human Door Knocker Suing For “Putting Her Name On The Internet” By Questioning Obvious Lie About Chick Fil-A Food Poisoning

Lawsuit Of The Day: Human Door Knocker Suing For “Putting Her Name On The Internet” By Questioning Obvious Lie About Chick Fil-A Food Poisoning

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information.

Our Twitter account is suspended. Click on the image to follow @FreeMuhTurtle while we try to get our account back.







Yesterday we published this blog about a Worcester woman who claimed that her boyfriend suffered from food poisoning as a result of eating tainted meat at the new Chick Fil-A on Gold Star Boulevard. We pointed out many inconsistencies in her story, including her claim that the “gray” meat her boyfriend ate was sitting in her trash at home, only for her to later say that her boyfriend reordered food at Chick Fil-A. If this is true that means she brought the gray meat back home with her after realizing it was bad and put it in her trash. She didn’t give it back to them or throw it in the trash there. She took spoiled meat home with her. Definitely. Naturally she didn’t have a picture of it but she still welcomed people to come over her house in order to inspect it themselves.

When we factored in that no one else seemed to get food poisoning, which would seemingly be impossible, we came to the conclusion that this chick was an attention seeking liar. Just our opinion.

At least we thought it was our opinion. Turns out it’s actually deformation of character and we’ve got yet another Turtleboy lawsuit coming our way……

“You literally put my name on the Internet.”

Yup, by screenshotting something she wrote on Facebook using her real name, it was TURTLEBOY who put her name on the Internet. Not her. Then we “created slander,” a type of SPOKEN defamation that she is obviously VERY familiar with.

But it’s too late – she’s already lawyered up:

Oh man, court is gonna be so much fun!! I love Internet court!! Gives us a chance to defend our undefeated streak!! Just do me a favor Angelica – when you come to court can you please wear your dog ears?

If you do that we will have no choice but to settle for millions.

Then we pulled the ol’ switcheroo on her:

Anyone but Vulva!!! That guy’s gonna take his tainted meat and pound us into oblivion!!

Anyway Angelica, we still think you’re lying. Actually, we know you are. Your story just isn’t the least bit believable. Sometimes you fuck up, write dumb shit on the Internet, and Turtleboy blogs about it. When you do that you have two options – move on with your life, or Internet lawsuit. If you choose the latter it almost guarantees that you will be featured in a round 2 followup. It’s just too entertaining not to share.

20 Comment(s)
  • Da G fo Genius!
    December 2, 2017 at 12:55 am

    Silly door knocker , YOU put your name on the buildboard for the world to see, because you “love” Chick- Fil-A. At least that is what you claim. . . The Sphenoid is connected to the skull bone, the skull bone houses the cerebral hemisphere. . . . I think that metal booger is rusting; sue the person who stuck you with that.

  • Fly on the wall!!!
    November 22, 2017 at 3:54 pm

    She is so freggin ugly I find it hard to believe she has a boy friend. He must bark at the moon also.

  • Jammy D
    November 22, 2017 at 2:54 pm

    Someone find out where she works and send this to her employers…no one this stupid should have a job. I bet with that frizzy hair they think she counts as a diversity hire.

  • TJB
    The JOO
    November 22, 2017 at 2:14 pm

    The only stinky bad meat is on her panties.

  • Grammar nutsee
    November 22, 2017 at 1:46 pm

    It’s “defamation” of character, not “deformation”

    • Mike
      November 22, 2017 at 4:26 pm

      Look up! Did you see that joke that just flew over your head? Yeah, “deformation of character” is intentional. Perhaps read more articles before commenting so you get a sense of TB writing style.

  • Phong
    November 22, 2017 at 10:21 am

    He actually got sick from all the jesusy goodness. That boys the devil.

  • dbk
    November 22, 2017 at 10:21 am

    This is weak, go after some ratchets selling food stamps or low income druggies. I feel like attacking this girl is jumping the shark for you. She is just a regular chick with the same style of any other millennial, theres no drug abuse, arrest records and she actually has a job. Dont hide behind the freedom of speech, just come out and admit your a troll site. And most of the time its pretty funny but this is something different and you know it, now you’ve doubled down on someone that probably doesn’t deserve this.

    • don
      November 22, 2017 at 11:33 am

      aww how cute. she brought her mother into tb to try and make her sound good. its not working. tell her to get out of that basement and get a damn job. rent doesnt pay itself. and please please please do not let her breed. this world is already full of idiots, we do not need any more…….literally.

  • Paul Casale
    November 22, 2017 at 9:47 am

    Another one of those airheads who uses the word “literally” every other sentence & think it makes her sound intelligent.

  • JoeMomma
    November 22, 2017 at 9:43 am

    Should we sent this to ChickFil-A
    They are the one who should sue for slander…..

    • Dee's nutz
      November 22, 2017 at 10:11 am

      Did she call the board of health? No. Was she able to provide this tainted meat from so called Chick-fil-A to them? No. If anyone’s name is been tainted that would be Chick-fil-A’s without provocation or proof. I say good luck to this dumb twat.

    • Death
      November 23, 2017 at 8:07 pm

      All of you are fucking pieces of shit, keep hiding behind a screen, I’ll find you eventually

  • JS
    November 22, 2017 at 9:26 am

    Does anyone else think she looks like the picture on the packaging of one of those 3 foot tall blow up dolls?

  • Stunt Penis
    November 22, 2017 at 9:02 am

    what’s the thing hanging out of her nose? Snot collector?

  • whatevuh
    November 22, 2017 at 8:58 am

    She has a job? Who would hire something that looked like that? Not the face I would want on my business . . . .

    • Dave Lind
      November 23, 2017 at 10:03 am

      Telemarketer maybe? I still cannot understand how someone would want to put something in their nose that make them look like the cows that are at the Big E. How is that attractive? Mooooo

      • Da G fo Genius!
        December 2, 2017 at 1:00 am

        I think it is hilarious! I wonder if she understands (with all her self professed intellect) what the ring through the nose represents. Bwahahahahaha!

  • ElJefe72
    November 22, 2017 at 8:57 am

    It’s better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

    • Strata
      November 22, 2017 at 11:00 am

      I’m laughing so hard at her. And I’m sure all her friends and family are sharing these links. Next time think before you post lies against an innocent business.

Comment on this Post


All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It