Human Door Knocker Claims Boyfriend Got Food Poisoning From Gray Meat At Worcester Chick Fil-A, Invites Strangers To Go Through Her Trash At Her House

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There’s a new Chick Fil-A open in Worcester, which for some is reason is controversial because the owners of Chick Fil-A have unpopular opinions on social issues. So you knew as soon as this one opened up on Gold Star Boulevard that the ratchets would come crawling out of the wood works.  Here’s your first of many to come…..

So let me get this straight. You went to Chick Fil-A on Saturday and your boyfriend has already self-diagnosed himself with food poisoning? Must’ve put that Web MD degree to good use. This is DEFINITELY the face of a person whose word I would take at face value.

Definitely.

Likewise her boy toy seems like the real pick of the litter.

According to Angelica Vestal, it was the ONLY thing he ate all day, and he got the cold shakes and has been dropping earth shattering dumps in the can all day:

Some began to question her story, as it smelt like your classic “give me free shit” ploy that ratchets like to do to large corporations that throw gift cards at annoying people to shut them up.

But yet she claimed that she didn’t want to file a lawsuit, she just wants the folks at Chick Fil-A to wear gloves, even though wearing gloves has nothing to do with preventing food poisoning.

Conveniently she said she would not be filing a lawsuit because she could not afford the filing fee:

She’s also upset that the woman who handed her an ice cream cone wasn’t wearing gloves:

Because apparently you have to put on gloves now when dispensing soft serve ice cream.

Of course her biggest crime is that she’s one of these:

Burn in hell.

Someone else pointed out that it couldn’t possibly be food poisoning if her weapon of ass destruction was the only one who was affected, but she had an answer for that one too:

Yea because the health department is the only agency that can assess whether or not he’s got food poisoning from a chicken sandwich. It’s not like we have hospitals or anything like that in Worcester.

Then the story quickly took a turn for the dramatic, as she announced that her boyfriend’s sandwich was gray, and if anyone doesn’t believe her they are more than welcomed to come to her house, look in her trash, and see for themselves:

She was not expecting anyone to take her up on her offer, but she underestimated just how far Worcester people will go to prove a point:

Oh I see. So the tainted gray meat is in her trash. She didn’t take a picture of it, and won’t now because it’s too far into the trash. Yup, this story adds up!

But wait, it gets better. Let’s see if you can pick out the lie/contradiction here…..

“He got something different and it had to be remade.”

This of course would mean that he realized right away that the meat was tainted, and he threw it in the trash and ordered more food from the same place that just sold him tainted gray meat.

But wait, he didn’t throw the meat out at Chick Fil-A, because if you recall, it’s sitting in their trash at home:

Oops!!!

Nonetheless the moron patrol fell for it hook line and sinker:

As you can see from her profile picture, Robin Campanale has clearly put a lot of thought into this one:

Being such a deep thinker and all.

Probably a really good idea to blindly believe a random Facebook post from this snatchimal:

That right there is a face you can trust.

Her post about food poisoning opened up a ghetto version of “Worcester me too”:

New rule – if you have any pictures of yourself on Facebook sticking your tongue down some neckbeard’s throat

We automatically assume you’re lying about everything.

Just kidding. That rule isn’t new at all.

Finally Mom, who of course has four names, jumped in to defend her daughter’s Chick Fil-A honor. And by that I mean she threatened to fight people:

Mom is the black one? Ummmm……

Sure thing.

The bottom line is, this isn’t harmless. This is how you destroy a business. You start spreading fake news about food poisoning, and you keep away new customers by doing so. Chick Fil-A is awesome, and we’ve waited a long time to get it. And I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let some lying, attention seeking chick with a door knocker hanging from her nose drive them out of town.