Legendary Spencer Junkbox Stripper Mom Starts $4K GoFundMe After Throwing Herself In Front Of Plow Backfires, Tells Women She Can Bang Their Husbands For Rent
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Here’s an interesting GoFundMe from a Spencer “exotic dancer” named Tiana Stumpo, AKA Tiana Rose, AKA Tiana Trance:
So let me get this straight. This lovely creature is a stripper who somehow got hit by a plow last winter. Then last month she gets in another accident as a passenger, and now she’s disabled and can’t work. Yet disability somehow denied her, despite literally being hit by a plow. Now she needs you to pay her rent.
People have actually been messaging us for months about this walking Newport Lights commercial, but we haven’t had time to look into it. They claim that she jumped in front of the plow for a payday that obviously has not come to fruition yet. And she seems to confirm that since she’s actually been bragging about how she doesn’t have to worry about getting a job because she got that plow money coming her way:
Which is weird, because according to her Facebook commentary, she’s ballin!! For instance, she’s so beautiful that dudes who just met her one time buy her $20,000 cars, due to the fact that she’s so hot:
She’s a hair stylist by trade, but she only strips because she can. Plus she has a house and a wicked rich fiance:
She claimed to live in Vegas making the big bucks:
And all these jealous bitches are just mad because their mans be getting lap dances from her:
Oh, and this heroin addict also has a child:
Which is great, because clearly she’s the ideal candidate for motherhood. Clearly.
Anyone who has a problem with the lifestyle she’s living is just a jealous fat chick:
But yet she doesn’t make her money off of looks, she makes it off of her “personality”:
Oh yea, I know when I go to Sweaty Betty’s I make sure to ask the bartender which stripper has the best personality.
She’s totally not a hooker though. She just bangs a guy and in exchange he pays for her rent:
That’s not the same as being a hooker though. Definitely NOT a hooker.
Lots of respectable women consider it a “win in life” when you can “get men who have good jobs” so they can take care of you:
And if her man runs out on her she’ll just take your man and he’ll pay her rent instead.
After all, who wouldn’t wanna wake up to this bowl of crab raccoon every morning:
The only women who have beef with her are 5’s at most:
She apparently broke up with the baby daddy because he’s a “lowlife junkbox” (unlike her) who made her buy her own car. He also abandoned their child for another junkbox in New Hampshire, but she took him back with open legs the second he got some of that blue magic.
It’s actually pretty hard to keep track of which fiance she’s on:
She’s apparently mad at one of them for not bailing her ass out of jail:
I can’t even keep track of what any of this means at this point. I’m just enjoying the show like you are.
Kind of strange being engaged to different men, especially when you’re a lickalotapuss in your natural environment. Just know that she won’t give you a tongue bath if you have herpes, BUT she is down for some scissoring:
She also claims to work for project AIDS where she saved the lives of four people by administering Narcan:
Which makes sense, because when I see this ratchet:
The first words that come to mind are Narcan and AIDS.
According to her she hands out Narcan like candy:
And by that she means,
“I carry around Narcan in my trunk that I stole from my last free ambulance ride.”
Oh, and she’s also an expert in checking her white privilege:
Oh yea, there’s no one more privileged then a drugged out stripper from Spencer who throws herself in front of plows for the sole purpose of starting a GoFundMe.
She evidently knew this blog was coming, but couldn’t imagine what we would possibly write about:
I know right? What could we possibly say about a career criminal, junkbox “mom,” stripper from Spencer who lectures people about white privilege, tells strange women that she can bang their husbands for rent money, and seemingly moves from one fiance to the next depending on who’s offering her a car. There’s hardly any material to work with there.