Meanwhile In Worcester, Here’s A Guy Grabbing Moby Trick’s Twin Hams Through Her Boy Shorts On Main Street

Meanwhile In Worcester, Here’s A Guy Grabbing Moby Trick’s Twin Hams Through Her Boy Shorts On Main Street

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at for more information.

Screen Shot 2017-02-27 at 10.14.48 AM





Thanks to the clouds in the sky today, this is the closest Worcesterites got to seeing a total eclipse. And if you stare at it for too long you will go blind too.

Only in Worcester.

Nothing to see here. Just a guy in calico shorts walking through Main South, grabbing a big ol piece of the sweet potato pie he just paid for! Oh, and she’s wearing slippers.

And I guess her robe is in the wash.

God knows where they ended up playing polish the porpoise, but odds are someone urinated on it the night before.

Apparently there have been a number of sightings of these lovebirds around town:

Odds are they were probably just on the way to a Joe Petty standout.

This is why Worcester can’t have nice things.







We urge you to support the following local businesses. 

Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

Screen Shot 2017-02-27 at 10.14.48 AM

Screen Shot 2017-03-31 at 2.17.19 PM


4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

Screen Shot 2017-03-25 at 8.48.23 PM

19 Comment(s)
  • September 3, 2017 at 8:50 am

    Quality content is the key to interest the users to pay a quick visit the
    web site, that’s what this web page is providing.

  • Sterling Turtle Rider
    August 24, 2017 at 1:16 am

    Those look more like bread bags tied onto her feet than slippers

  • Harry Snapperorgans
    August 23, 2017 at 11:40 am

    Damn, it took many bags of EBT-sponsored Cheetohs ™ to build that mass of ass.

  • Linda
    August 21, 2017 at 10:19 pm

    Yup. That’s Worcester.

  • Rightwinger
    August 21, 2017 at 10:14 pm

    Maybe they are on thier way to meet up with Gaffney to pick some weeds?

    • Mirror Mirror
      August 21, 2017 at 11:08 pm

      You’re really pretty sad, aren’t you? Maybe you should ask Joe for a raise.

      • Rightwinger
        August 21, 2017 at 11:35 pm


  • itsjustme
    August 21, 2017 at 10:11 pm

    Isn’t that the same girl who sells weed in her underwear?

  • Sir-mix-alot
    August 21, 2017 at 9:27 pm

    Even the whiteboys have to shout, baby got back.

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    August 21, 2017 at 9:24 pm

    WTF – that’s all I gots.

    August 21, 2017 at 9:12 pm

    Now why would you wanna pick on a nice couple out for a stroll?

    They’re probably coming from church. One of those churches that eats children.

  • Mom's Basement
    August 21, 2017 at 8:36 pm

    That dude is totally outsized. I’ll bet she robbed his ass.

    • Maura Healey
      August 21, 2017 at 11:06 pm

      He’s her pimp.

  • juror seven esq.
    August 21, 2017 at 8:24 pm

    Don’t get your hand get caught up in that grand canyon. Don’t even want to think about all that cheese that would be on the fingers.

  • Mile
    August 21, 2017 at 7:50 pm

    Finally, turtleboy has dropped the sjw act abd return to what it’s good for.

  • Dick Dover
    August 21, 2017 at 7:00 pm

    For fucks sake man, it’s dinner time. I was cooking a pork loin you bastard.

  • August 21, 2017 at 6:48 pm

    That made me throw up a little. And by a little I mean I filled a Hefty bag.

  • Lisa
    August 21, 2017 at 6:01 pm

    Polish the Porpoise! That one has me on the floor!!!!

  • They call me Ponch
    August 21, 2017 at 5:43 pm

    Diff’rent Strokes for diffrent folks!

    2017 version of The Whistler!

    No racism here Petty!

Comment on this Post


This Truck Driver Was Really, Really Pissed About The 65 Car Accident Pile Up On 290 In Worcester.
Chinese Guy Jumps Seven Floors To His Death To Get Out Of Shopping With Girlfriend
South African Dude Who Pretended To Sign Language Obama’s Nelson Mandela Speech Is Apparently An Insane Murdering Rapist?