Hoodrat Heroes

Meet Weymouth’s Kelly Scamerico: The Radioactive, Section Eight Approved, Overlord Of All The Fupasloths-With Nine GFMs, Disney Trips Galore, And Exploitation Of Her Non-Terminally Ill Kid

Get a six pack. I’m going long, Turtlefam.

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Our Facebook page is suspended again, so make sure you to LIKE THE LOST BOYS OF TURTLE Facebook page to keep up with our latest blogs.

Our Facebook page is suspended again, so make sure you to LIKE THE LOST BOYS OF TURTLE Facebook page to keep up with our latest blogs.

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM





People of Weymouth…. it’s the blog you’ve been waiting years for! 

Turtleriders, I want to introduce you to the skankiest, most diabolical, Fupasloth anyone has ever seen. Look, here she is in her natural habitat! 

Kelly Janerico, or as the townsfolk call her “Scamerico” or “Kuntfund Kelly” is a Caucasian trash legend down here on the dirty South Shore. 
I’ve been watching Scamerico fight her way all over the town pages for the past two years. Somehow, as soon as I start working for Turtleboy, she went silent. Almost too silent. 

Saturday, she came out of her con cave with more wrath than any other Fupasloth before her. It’s like you’ve taken all the swamp donkeys, guttermuppets, skankbeasts, cheese hogs, sausage queens, gravy dumpsters, and sewer guppies from blogs past, dipped them in radioactive material, and gave her a cape made out of Go Fund Me fliers, dirty pajama bottoms, and eyebrow pencils.

This is the big one.

It’s The Weymouth Scamerico. 

She wants you to buy her a new car because she had light in her eyes and crashed hers. It’s like her fifteenth GFM in the past two years.

Does that thing look like someone needed to use the jaws of life? Nope, she’s just throwing it in there for good measure. She also has to mention her sick kids because that’s how Scamerico rolls. No mention of insurance covering something silly as a car accident! Ouch. Scratching your arm must have been so traumatic. 

Scamerico will proudly tell you that she’s OFD, originally from Dorchester, as if that’s something to brag about. 

She’s got a handful of kids, who all have the same minimal genetic defect called NF1, that causes them to have benign tumors in their brains. It’s easily taken care of with a single yearly visit to the doc, but the idea of your kid having brain tumors was just too rich for Scamerico to let slide. She parades her kids all over her 9+ GFM pages, weeping about how they have these debilitating brain tumors, crying about how they need to raise money for medical expenses. 
But not the other kids? 

Meanwhile, she’s totally covered under MassHealth. I repeat, the kids are not in danger. She’s exploiting them for pity cash! We, as in the people of the commonwealth, pay for her health insurance.

God help if you call her out on it through. She’s going to throat punch you and wait for you outside of Stop and Shop. (That’s where the Scamerico gets her free groceries.) 

She proudly boasts that she’s got section eight! (You probably remember Jeannie Mayhew as the mother of the Weymouth Sausage Queen.) 

Then uses all the extra cash from her hustle to spend a week in Disney World and a cruise too! 
Now, Scamerico later back peddled, saying that the vacation was funded by Make A Wish. The only issue with that was HER KID ISN’T DYING and Make A Wish only funds children with terminal illnesses. So, she used the GFM cash to go on vacation. This is the stuff of lore.

One time, during the Christmas season of 2015, Scamerico told all of the local toy drives that she didn’t have a vehicle and she needed the free presents delivered to her door. She claimed that all of the presents were stolen, and yet somehow finds a vehicle to go and pick up MORE presents the next day.

Basically, Scamerico got two sets of free presents. But she brags about having all this cash for her kids to get the latest styles? You’re fucking kidding me, right? 
This broad looks like Shrek but with be charm of Lord Farquaad. Her eyebrows looks like something that attacked Jeff Daniels in Arachnophobia. Thems be the hungriest caterpillars we’ve ever seen! Okay, I’m done. I’m done!

There was also a couple of threads on Everything Weymouth talking about how she also went around town, using her daughter’s illness to collect money for Girl Scout cookies, took the cash, and then never brought them their delicious samoas and thin mints. I don’t have screenshots of those but I watched them happen with my own eyes, back in my pre-Turtle days. 

She then comes up with a genius idea. She’s going to say her “sick” kid has one wish before she dies (at the age of 98 because she’s not really sick.) She wants to be a cheerleader but it’s apparently $400 for a single cheer uniform and Scamerico just doesn’t have the means. Boom. GoFundMe. 

Sister in law sick? Boom. GoFundMe. (Them eyebrows must run in the family.)

Another family sick? Boom. GoFundMe.

Her cousin’s family has a house fire? The news says the Red Cross is taking care of them for a place to stay. Boom. GoFundMe. 

Then, because Massheath only covered all of the family’s health expenses, Scamerico started making shitty bracelets to sell all of the yard sale pages, saying they were for her sick daughter. When people started calling her out for being the Godzilla of Skanks, Scamerico had some choice words for them. But just in case the bracelets didn’t work out? Boom. Five More GoFundMe pages. 

Meanwhile, the town of Weymouth is in a feeding frenzy waiting for this article to come out. We were getting so many messages I had to post a notice that we were on it. Kelly didn’t like that and ran face first in to Desk Girl. 

This is the first time in the history of turtle we were threatened with a lawsuit before publishing. You’re not getting your hands on our money you filthy eyebrow beast!

Oh, and TWINSIES! 

If you’ve had a run in with Scamerico just message the Turtleboy Facebook page. Something tells me we didn’t even graze the surface with this one.




We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.


Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 1.20.12 PM

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

45 Comment(s)
  • Original OFD OG for real
    March 2, 2017 at 7:09 pm

    You low balling , no good , good for nothing , worst piece of shit , bil on the ass of societ, unfit subhumanoid, gutterslut, twatwaffle, scamming lieing cheating cuntheaded, shit talking fucking Cowardly monster . if you EVER darken my or my fucking families fb pages, houses e mails or cell phone I will not hesitate to rip your fucking head off shit down your fuckng throat just so you will have some good shit to talk . You hear me KELLYKUNT?. I will cut you into little pieces and shove your remains up your dumb ass husbands ass . You ike it up his ass anyways ya dirty bitch you know you dildo him in there . Fucking transgender looking no class , low life fucking pond scum .Dirty whore fucking anything that moves . Fuck you walk by a farm the fucking chickens stop moving .You aint no OFD bitch your ass moved there when you was 5 . OFD for you stands for obtuse fake douchebag. Ill wait while you look up obtuse you retarded bitch Heed my warning stay away from me and mine . You thnk you tough? Youre a coward and a monster . You oughta be shot and ya kids oughta be taken away from you . Youre so low you can handball off the curb the fucking sewer rejests you fucking hoodrat .

  • CLP2
    February 27, 2017 at 5:45 pm

    Any word from her after she read this article. I could use a good laugh

    • February 27, 2017 at 7:08 pm

      She made a couple comments on the Facebook page and told a bunch of people she was going to the police/ a lawyer today.

  • Amanda
    February 27, 2017 at 1:03 pm

    While this lady might he a scammer I can assure you, as someone with nf type 1 , it is not always once a year visits , and it’s not curable . My daughter needs early intervention for walking , as she is behind due to low muscle tone . I am in a group on facebook for parents of kids with nf and have seen posts about it killing children
    Not all cases are severe , I am one of the lucky people who does only need once a year visits . But as a kid I was awful in gym and I’m bow legged , have the benign tumors in a few places, and really sick with numbers . Do some research nf1 can really be awful and this blog saying is nothing could screw a family who really needs help down the road !

    That being said, this woman is awful

    • Sheila
      February 27, 2017 at 2:34 pm

      I agree. There is no doubt this woman is scum – but nf1 is a very serious disease and should not be minimized. My sister-in-law has it and has had several different tumors with cancer. She has thousands of tumors within he body putting pressure on her spinal column and organs.

      This woman clearly abuses all kinds of services and it’s disgusting. I’m glad this blog is here to call out those who do but please do not minimize a disease that you don’t know about. This blog has a big following and I would hate for people to think nf1 is no big deal.

  • Sheila
    February 27, 2017 at 12:49 pm

    Who is the blog person? I need clarify something that you wrote.

    Can you contact me at iwalk4nf@gmail.com, I need to let you know that what you have said about NF is incorrect, I can explain to you the facts. It is NOT easily taken care of with a single year appointment. Please contact me so I may discuss with you exactly what NF entails. Thank you. And, please post this website if people want to learn the facts. http://www.ctf.org. Thank you. FYI, my son has NF1 and I’m a educator and representative for the NF Community.

    **She’s got a handful of kids, who all have the same minimal genetic defect called NF1, that causes them to have benign tumors in their brains. It’s easily taken care of with a single yearly visit to the doc, but the idea of your kid having brain tumors was just too rich for Scamerico to let slide. She parades her kids all over her 9+ GFM pages, weeping about how they have these debilitating brain tumors, crying about how they need to raise money for medical expenses. **

  • Kevin Lynch
    February 26, 2017 at 7:51 pm

    The correct Massachusetts pronunciation for Dana Farber is Daner Fabah… Get it right, Scamerico!

    • Lynchburg
      February 26, 2017 at 9:23 pm

      Hello, I just wanted to ask, how is your 20K GoFundMe working out? I saw it on some Fitchburg site recently. I tried to donate but GFM does’nt accept pennies. Good luck with that!! FORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! w

  • Flupasloth Squared
    February 26, 2017 at 7:02 pm

    You can take the girl outta Dorchestah…. TRASH!!!!!!!!! How old is this “woman”?? She has how many rug rats and her high school mentality is “raising” them. Good God!! Just another reason this world is so effed up! Let’s hope her daughters are so ashamed of their “mother” that they go the opposite way.

    Maybe you should have suggested a “handle” of Vodka. You know, from the “packie”. This is part of the reason I moved from the suburbs of Boston. Give me country living NW of the city garbage any day!

    • Brian Albrecht
      February 26, 2017 at 7:56 pm

      Don’t talk about my mother like that you fuckin faggot. I’m fuckin the Queen of Weymouth and me and my boyz will suck your cock for being an asshole. That’s right I’m so fuckin tough I’ll even let you cum all over my face you faggot. You better not get any on my pink Red Sox shirt otherwise I’ll get mad at you.


  • Kim's Nails
    February 26, 2017 at 6:16 pm

    Victoria Secret screams counterfeit and as usual they always have enough of cash to do their nails.

  • Wwy
    February 26, 2017 at 5:52 pm

    You gotta feel bad about this Brian Albrect he’s still mad his father left his mother for a guy but that’s gaymouth for ya. This kid should of been aborted thats why we have planned parenthood,poor kid has 5 fathers and one mother he’s a sad victim to BET.

    • zephyrcat
      February 26, 2017 at 5:56 pm

      I’ll admit it guys im obsessed with Brian Albrecht. Weymouth is a better city than mine and I CANT STAND IT! I wanted to see if he was for real or not so I went to the starbucks in worcester. the one on east central street at noon. And there he was in his red sox t shirt just like he said he’d be. I had my twink boyfriend who I had just finished blowing in my toyota priu. He came all over my face and i guess i ddint get it all. Thinking he wouldnt know who i was i went up and ordered a venti coffee. THEN I SAW HIM STARING AT US! I got out of that mother fucking starbucks as fast as i could with a busted asshole.

      • ZephyrCat
        February 26, 2017 at 7:27 pm

        How did my asshole get busted in such a short amount of time? Tell me more.

      • Kevin Lynch
        February 26, 2017 at 7:47 pm

        Nice try, Brian! It’s so pathetic, its fucking hilarious

        • ZephyrCat
          February 26, 2017 at 7:56 pm

          At least he’s trying now! Isn’t it better to bust balls & have fun than get all twisted cuz someone “talked shit”? Although I’m thinking it’s still not in fun for Mr Albrecht!

          • brian albrecht(the real one)
            February 26, 2017 at 11:01 pm

            HAHA Kevin lynch HAHA im laughing at you and your sad excuse of a family. YOURE AN ALCOHOLIC you fucking degenerate

        • Brian albrecht(therealone)
          February 26, 2017 at 10:53 pm

          What are you doing here you inbred fuck? I thought I told you to take that pack of mutants you call a family And to crawl back under that rock you ugly cunts crawled out of. BE GONE YOU FUCKING PUSSY! Come to weymouth. I FUCKING DARE YOU!

          • ZephyrCat
            February 26, 2017 at 10:56 pm

            Haha Brian’s a fag. He thinks weymouths tough. I went there once. Made it out fine. That’s how you know I’m tough Brian. #iworkoutsometimes

          • KevinLynch
            February 26, 2017 at 10:58 pm

            Shut your mouth brian! Can an admin ban this guy? He’s been personally attacking my family he doesnt even know them! what the fuck!!!!!!!! I googled Brian Albrecht weymouth. A BUNCH OF ARRESTS COME UP. COme on turtle boy! we dont need that type of garbage around here.FUCK YOU BRIAN ALBRECHT FUCK YOU!!!

          • Brian Albrecht (REALLY the real one not a fake one)
            February 27, 2017 at 12:24 am

            The guy above me is fake he didn’t use enough #’s


  • MAH
    February 26, 2017 at 5:17 pm

    What I don’t get about GoFund Me’s, is why would you post them on a town site? If I ever needed a GoFund Me, hopefully never, I would post on my page only. Why put your business out there to strangers? I have supported 2 GoFund Me accounts of 2 friends. I know their requests were legit. People who abuse other people’s emotions with their twisted pleas are sick and it makes everyone question the legitimacy of a GoFund Me. BTW, if my child wants to participate in an activity, I will find a way for them to do that, like offering to volunteer for organization or something. If, it ultimately turns out, I can’t afford it, then my child can’t participate. If this lady truly can’t afford a cheerleading outfit, then YouTube some cheering videos and take her kid to the park and practice cheerleading. Start saving for next year.

  • Jack Mehoffer
    February 26, 2017 at 5:15 pm

    I like to pretend that a great flood will rid us all of people like this, BUT LETS BE HONEST, THEY WOULD BE SCAMMIN IN A FLOOD AND WE WILL NEVER BE RID OF THEM. THANK GOD FOR DA TURTLE.

  • Glugslug
    February 26, 2017 at 5:11 pm

    What a disgusting slug. Report her.

    • Glugslug
      February 26, 2017 at 5:11 pm

      *Report her gofundme

  • Swallowed my vomit
    February 26, 2017 at 4:23 pm

    That’s one ugly fucking piece of shit! Who the hell would ever want to fuck that cave bitch?? That trash belongs in a landfill!!! Never to be seen or heard from again!!!

  • WHAT?
    February 26, 2017 at 3:50 pm

    My God! Is Stephen King writing for Turtleboy now?

    That looks like something you would poke with a long stick.

    Is it real?

  • Brian Albrecht
    February 26, 2017 at 3:37 pm

    Yo, that’s my aunt and current lady! I told you I fuck the heavies of Weymouth!

    • Brian Albrecht
      February 26, 2017 at 3:54 pm

      Yo Man, I can’t lie anymore. Word, that’s my mom yo. She ain’t as bad she looks tho. She makes a mean sausage burrito. She also takes a mean sausage burrito too. Y’all nowatimsayin! Anyway lay off the fat bitch. Dats my mom yo.

        February 26, 2017 at 4:16 pm

        What a horrible attempt at a joke. Shut the fuck up, yeah you’re real cool using my name. Just another queer who jealous of me. YOUR MOTHER WEARS COMBAT BOOTS YOU FUCKING PUSSY. WANT TO MEET UP? FOR REAL COME MEET ME IN WEYMOUTH 100! IM TIRED OF YOU FAGGOTS RUNNING YOUR MOUTH. fucking internet trolls. Everyone knows you’re not really me

          February 26, 2017 at 4:31 pm

          Aw man, y’all see what I’m sayin? Thats the hormones talkin! Damn I’m sorry y’all. I’m gonna lay down for a liitle bit and masturbate to calm me down. Damn thing so small though and I can’t find my tweezers. I don’t even know if it’s a little dick or a big clit! Y’all feelin’ me?

          • Brian albrecht
            February 26, 2017 at 4:38 pm

            zephyrcat youre a fucking clown. YOU pussy bitch. Suck my cock i know you want to you faggot. COME MEET ME. TRULY A FUCKING JOKE YOU DONT HAVE TO REGISTER A USER NAME ON HERE. WHENS THIS SITE GOING TO STOP BEING A BARSTOOL JR?

          • Brian's Tiny Penis
            February 26, 2017 at 4:54 pm

            It’s like an okra tip, but I totally rock this bush.

        • BrIAn aLbReChT
          February 26, 2017 at 4:50 pm

          The guy above me is a fake.

          • BRIAN ALBRECHT
            February 26, 2017 at 5:04 pm

            Motherfucker, now I’m upset and shit again. Guys, underneath this angry exterior I’m really just a vulnerable SJW. My mom abused me. She’s used to hit me with the strap on when I wouldn’t clean my room. That leaves scars y’know.

        • Brian Albrecht
          February 26, 2017 at 5:33 pm

          Yo I’ve really been to jail so don’t fuck with me yo. I sucked so much cock in there I developed a lisp and a hatred towards people. They used to run trains on me even so I only ever took one cock at a time until I went to the Starbucks in P-Town on Sunday. I am so proud of who I have become.


  • ZephyrCat
    February 26, 2017 at 3:26 pm

    Anyway, this tankbeast is obviously a sociopath. Nothing a good punch to the throat won’t solve.

  • Doc
    February 26, 2017 at 3:15 pm

    Such shame brought to the family name, it’s enough to make one quit his promising pro wrestling career to run an orphanage in Mexico.

  • Eyebrow city
    February 26, 2017 at 3:09 pm

    How much money has she cost the taxpayers in the last twenty years ?

  • Brian Albrecht
    February 26, 2017 at 2:52 pm

    Yup! Someone told me she sucked dick for cash multiple times. Just a total slampig pill head drunk. TRUE TRASH, OF COURSE WE GOT SOME DORCHESTER HOE BAG RUINING THE GOOD NAME OF WEYMOUTH.
    I run weymouth, yeah i’ve caught a couple cases out’chea but its all good. I still FUCK WITH WEYMOUTH HEAVY.
    and all you #worcestercountypussys can stay the fuck off the south shore. wouldnt last a day before i caught you and pressed that cold steel to your dome. Or I steal from you to fund my xanax and dope habit.
    if anyeone has a problem with anything ive said on the other blogs or doesnt believe me I will be in the south shore all week. If any of you worcester Launchpads feel like swallowing ur teeth, just come in my general vicinity.

    • ZephyrCat
      February 26, 2017 at 3:24 pm

      This is a joke, right? It’s gotta be. Nobody in real life acts like this. Not the fupasloth. No, this Brian Albrecht character. Funny as shit though. If you’re for real, you’re living in fantasy land. No doubt if this isn’t a joke you’re the biggest pussy in real life.

    • MrSmiley
      February 27, 2017 at 3:54 am

      SSTG and TBS own Brian’s braaaain.

  • Homo Brian Albrectum
    February 26, 2017 at 2:50 pm

    I bet straight Brian would pop a xanax in her drink and get him a piece of that weymouth milf’s ass.

Comment on this Post


All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It