New Hampshire Boob With “This Guy Needs A Beer” Shirt Was Destined To Crash Shitfaced In Front Of The Police Station

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Meanwhile in New Hampshire………

NECNA New Hampshire man was wearing a shirt expressing his desire for alcohol when police arrested him in a drunk driving crash. Police say 29-year-old Joshua Tackett of Seabrook drove his Chevrolet Cruze off Amesbury Road in Kensington just before 9 p.m. Friday. Tackett was going south when police say he went across the northbound lane, off the road and through a stone wall and a granite post. The car then slammed into a utility pole in front of the Kensington Police Department.

When police arrested Tackett on a DWI charge, he was wearing a T-shirt reading “This guy needs a beer,” with two thumbs pointed up at his face. Tackett’s car was badly damaged. He suffered what police are calling minor injuries and refused treatment. Speed and alcohol are both believed to have been factors in the crash.


This guy needs more than just a beer. He needs a lawyer, an Uber, a new set of teeth, and a less conspicuous haircut. Seriously though, the stupidity of some drunken drivers never ceases to amaze me. I understand that many people out there have had a couple beers and driven home, often illegally. But it takes a special kind of dooshnozzle to crash your car directly in front of the police station. Seriously, there’s a million and one things you could’ve crashed into, but the guy with the “This guy needs a beer” shirt just HAD to crash into the utility poll in front of the police station. I feel like it was destiny. I mean, he’s 6’4″, has a mohawk, is so drunk he can’t open his eyes, and is wearing a shirt that says “this guy needs a beer.” There was a 99% chance he would eventually crash into a pole in front of the police station.


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11 Comment(s)
  • Publius
    April 25, 2016 at 7:16 pm

    It’s all shits and giggles till this asshole kills some innocent. Too bad he wasn’t ejected and be done with it.

  • Dgaf
    April 25, 2016 at 3:46 am

    That is one old looking 29 year old

    • Techy911
      April 25, 2016 at 12:45 pm

      Rose hard and put away wet one too many times…..

  • Sal Monella
    April 24, 2016 at 10:14 pm

    Drunk Lives Matter! Lay off him!

  • jmac
    April 24, 2016 at 5:52 pm

    It’s sad they fifn’t stop him before he reproduced

  • FiestyLawyerLady
    April 24, 2016 at 12:17 pm

    Really sad that this man would choose to drink and drive especially since he has 2 kids and a wife. Clean up your act, you have 3 people in your life who depend on you. Be the man you would want your daughter’s to marry one day. Set an example for them before it’s too late.

    • BobnMic
      April 25, 2016 at 2:18 am

      FiestyLadyLawyer I describe you as the following:

      1. Fiesty: Lively, determined, and courageous. Spirited, spunky, plucky, gutsy, gutty, ballsy.,

      2. Lady: No explanation required unless you are an alien.,

      3. Lawyer: A person whos profession involves the dissemination and interpretation of the United States Constitution as it pertains to matters of civil and criminal law ( local, state and federal) as well as being a sworn officer of the court.

      How did I do?

      • BobnMic
        April 25, 2016 at 2:38 am

        I forgot case law.

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          April 25, 2016 at 1:01 pm

          I have some bad qualities we can throw in there to even it out!

  • Reddog
    April 24, 2016 at 11:47 am

    How the hell did he fit in a Chevy cruz? Must of looked like Shaq in those Buick commercials a couple years ago.

    • Sterling Turtle Rider
      April 25, 2016 at 12:21 am

      I clock in at 6’4″ and test drove a Cruze and fit well enough… wasn’t as comfortable as the Equinox we eventually got, but yeah, it did kind of feel like Shaq in those commercials.

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