Hoodrat Heroes

Rockland Cops Called On Eddie Porkchops After He Showed Up In A Pink XXXL Muumuu To Confront Citizens Trying To Recall Him For Bobbin For Boners

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Just when you thought we’d heard the last of the Rockland Bobbin for Boners saga Eddie Porkchops shows up to add another chapter to this bootleg 50 Shades of Foreplay….

Police were called to Rockland Town Hal on Wednesday to respond to reports that Edward Kimball was arguing with residents who were collecting signatures to support the selectman’s recall. Four police cruisers responded to town hall at about 4:45 p.m. Wednesday for reports of a “possible assault in progress,” according to the police log. The officers said there was no assault but that Kimball got into a verbal argument with someone standing outside with a group collecting petition signatures in an effort to force a recall election for the veteran selectman.

“My understanding is that some adults got into a heated argument which ended prior to our arrival,” Rockland police Lt. Nicholas Zeoli said in an email. “There were no charges filed.”

Residents took the first step toward recalling Kimball when they submitted an affidavit with 500 signatures to the town clerk Tuesday. The clerk then issued an official recall petition. Supporters have two weeks to gather roughly 1,800 signatures before a recall election can be scheduled. They were trying to collect the signatures when the confrontation occurred.

Oh man, it’s just raining After Davids in Rockland these days!! Gotta give it to Eddie Porkchops, he is not going down without a fight. Any normal person would be so embarrassed by the fact that they were revealed to have had an affair with the town pass around/selectman, who then cheated on him by forcing the town manager to give her a DNA slurpie to get revenge on Eddie Porkchops’ wife, that they’d just resign. I can’t imagine the job pays much, if anything at all, so why put yourself through it? Everyone in town hates you and no one takes you seriously.

But clearly this glutton dumpster THRIVES on being the villain. He loves it. And when the citizens come together legally to petition the government to remove him, he shows up in his pink XXXL muumuu, with the wife he was cheating on in tow, in order to harass and intimidate the people who don’t want their town to be run by this sweat donkey.

Can’t wait to see what happens when he’s finally recalled. I bet when he is he still shows up to the next meeting and sits in his chair. He won’t leave until the police bust out the forklift and drag his fat ass out of there.

13 Comment(s)
  • TheBigOldDog
    July 31, 2018 at 10:08 am

    Kimball resigned this morning.

  • Kevins 9 Iron
    July 29, 2018 at 2:23 pm

    There is one more story to be written. Town Accountant / IT Director still on admin leave. Hint: did the town administrator have dirt on him and leveraged that knowledge?

  • Leonard Washington
    July 29, 2018 at 10:08 am

    “Eddy Pork Chops” has got to be the best name ever. May it follow him to his grave. (From the look of him a massive coronary is not far off).

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      July 31, 2018 at 10:14 am

      Fall River Gutter Muppet is the GOAT of Turleboy monikers.

  • TheBigOldDog
    July 28, 2018 at 11:50 pm

    Does anyone know where to go to sign the petition? This POS is not only an egomaniac degenerate he’s also mentally ill and needs to go ASAP

  • Josey Wales
    July 28, 2018 at 10:10 am

    Whoa there everybody!!! We are forgetting one HUGE important fact that we may not know. Pork Chop may be swinging some serious meat and Bobbin for Boners just loves getting her fart blaster stretched open to a point where she has to shove a tampon up there to stop the anal leakage. We all saw the video and the way she walks…this is a woman who loves it in the shitter.

    • Clitty Litter
      July 28, 2018 at 5:19 pm

      She looks like an ATM chick

  • mopey63
    July 27, 2018 at 7:45 pm

    Maybe he’ll leave after David does. Lmao. 😉 Hey Eddie, give your pork chop bones to veggie lady for her dog, he’s freaking starving! Maybe you can get a little piece from her too! Kill 2 birds with one pork chop.

  • Dave Lind
    July 27, 2018 at 7:01 pm

    Obviously she has a sex addiction. Who in their right mind would even want to see him naked, or even touch him She move to Montana yet?

    • Uncle Randy
      July 27, 2018 at 7:34 pm

      Imagine that guy pulling his cock and balls out and getting the Wheelabrator Waft as it fills your face.

      Smack them lips, there be work to do!

  • vicxh
    July 27, 2018 at 6:14 pm

    How was she able to give pork chop fellatio? His gut is hanging down to his knees lol…
    The hubby is like a ripped athlete and movie star compared to Pork Chop.

    • pushitaside
      July 27, 2018 at 9:59 pm

      I assume that’s a rhetorical question, like how manys licks does it take to get the middle of a Tootsie roll Pop

    • z
      July 29, 2018 at 11:28 am

      I hear he does great handstands. But you have to be fast. If it takes too long, the blubber could suffocate him

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