Hoodrat Heroes

Salty Slamhog Scores Own Goal By Identifying Portagee Porridge Pumper Fiance On Dartmouth Police Facebook Post Looking For Him, Says He’s Not Turning Himself In Because Dindu Nuffin

 

Loading...

The Dartmouth Police put out a APB for a thief today on their always entertaining Facebook page:

LOL, “Hans.” So good.

A Facebook group called “South Coast Live” shared the post.

And then we witnessed one of the greatest ratchet own goals of all time. It began when this woman showed up.

This salty slamhog’s name is Krissie Costa, and she decided to post this:

Keep in mind, at that point he had not yet been identified. But clearly she knew him, and a quick click on her Facebook page revealed…..

Being engaged since 2014 to this Portagee porridge pumper is the most Fall River thing ever. Ninety five percent chance he fell in love with her the moment she showed him how to take off his ankle bracelet on their first date.

But just in case it was unclear who the guy the cops were looking for was, she made it clear for those who hadn’t clicked on her page.

 

“fuck you and the rest of the rats you are.”

Ummm….pretty sure no one would know who Portuguese Sinbad was until you showed up and led us with a breadcrumb trail paid for with bartered food stamps. The only rat I see here is you hun.

Nevertheless she persisted.

Ain’t no way he’s turning himself in. She’s gonna get as many rounds of him burying his broomstick in her battleship cove as she can before the Dartmouth Police come and get him themselves. Until then she remains a Fall River legend.

 

Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:




Follow us on Youtube, SoundCloud, Twitter, and Facebook.

Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 

 

Loading...
26 Comment(s)
  • House of cheese
    June 18, 2019 at 12:30 pm

    Haha, these two are something else! Two useless pieces of shit. Krissie talks shit about every single person she knows. It’s pretty funny because she doesn’t realize that everyone knows it and she is the topic of most of their conversations. She is as shady as they come. She claims to be “a ride or die bitch” and calls other people “rats” although she has talked to the DTs and snitched on plenty of people. Lol as you can see ratted on her own man. She is as Dumb as a box of rocks!

  • Dick Scratcher
    June 18, 2019 at 9:45 am

    Limerick of the day.

    A fat, salty slamhog called Kris
    Had a boyfriend whose life was amiss
    But he’s no need to quiver
    In the courts of Fall River
    “Let ‘Em Walk” always moves to dismiss

    Dick Scratcher, (aged ninety one and three quarters).

    • Big Wick
      June 18, 2019 at 10:33 am

      Nice one, Dick! You’re raising your own bar pretty high! I dub thee, the Official TBS Limericist. As TBS’s general purview is eastern Taxachusetts, sooner or later you may a chance to revisit the man from Nantucket.

      • Dick Scratcher
        June 18, 2019 at 10:40 am

        I am moved by your kind words.

        And I fondly remember the wonderful journey by bucket of the old man from Nantucket. 🙂

      • Hugh-Bo Mont
        June 18, 2019 at 1:48 pm

        True, but margaret had some good ones, too.

  • Dont knock
    June 18, 2019 at 8:41 am

    There is only 1 solution to the issues in the New Bedford/Fall River area: Close all the schools and shut off EBT and Section 8. Starve these slimy Cape Verdean rats into extinction!

  • ncfoothillbilly
    June 18, 2019 at 6:23 am

    You’d better not answer that knocking on the door, useless thief. I suggest hiding under the bed with a blanket over you for protection. No one likes a damned thief. Cut one of his hands off. You know he’s done this before. Another probable junkie stealing for his habit; we have plenty of similar shitbags down here in the foothills.

    • Y
      June 18, 2019 at 10:29 am

      Read his FB page; he’s definitely done this before and a whole lot more.
      His daughter posted this to his FB page on Father’s Day:
      “happy father’s day dad, i know things been rough lately but thank you for getting everything together for me and my sister.”
      He replied, “Thank you baby I know honey I know that you and your sister are grown up and I wish I didn’t miss part of both of your lifes and I know I cant change what happened but I know that I can be the father that both of you need and I’m so grateful that you two never looked at me any different and both of you grown to be smart beautiful girls at least I did something right lol I love you so much and miss you I can’t wait to see you and kyleigh next Sunday at your graduation party.”
      So, uhm, yeah, he’s definitely a model citizen…

      • Heather
        June 18, 2019 at 12:43 pm

        From what I gathered from what he said to his children , was that he was and is a dead beat father. Probably never paid child support and most likely beat up on their mother. Probably Went to jail and their mother most likely raised them alone. Sounds like she did a good job and now that they are all grown up, he is ready to step up, probably cause he knows now that they are GROWN (key word) he can be the father they need like he said. Hahahaaaahaha!!!!!! Omg This guy! Fuck him!

  • Well, No Shit
    June 18, 2019 at 5:54 am

    Bold strategy. Let’s see how that plays out.

  • Disclaimer
    June 18, 2019 at 5:46 am

    Plus, I’m sorry, but if you’re an anonymous shitposter in the comments and you’re too stupid to use a VPN, then Darwin was gonna get you eventually. I have no sympathy for the anonymous shitposters either. People who come on the site and write anti-semitic or racist nonsense, or things about dog trackers having sex with dogs, are not adding anything of value to the website. They’re not participating in discourse, they’re just being incendiary for the sole purpose of being incendiary. Let me be perfectly clear – if you’re doing this, I would give you up in a heartbeat. I would feed you on a platter to Jamie’s attorney in order to save myself. People like you damage our brand and our image, and if you died in a fire tomorrow the world would be a better place without you.

    So if you have a problem with me giving up commenters’ information, you can blow me.

    • PACO
      June 18, 2019 at 5:57 am

      A little “Blast From the Not-So-Distant Past” this morning?

      Seemingly random, but thanks for the reminder.

    • F*U
      June 18, 2019 at 8:45 am

      UMM. A bit touchy here Skippy. Shitposting on the stupidity of the lesser is so personally rewarding. Out me and I burn your house down. Got it?

    • Another anonymous shitposter responder
      June 18, 2019 at 8:50 am

      TRIGGERED!

      Nice try, Jamie, trying to insinuate you’re UT. You’re even making a comment having NOTHING to do with the previous comments on this particular ratchet deserving her moment of internet fame (and her “alleged” thief of a fiancé). Go find a freakin’ dog, that’s supposed to be YOUR specialty.

    • Awww
      June 18, 2019 at 1:51 pm

      Did you just learn how to copy and paste? You did a great job 🙂

  • Sick of these Ratchet Fucks
    June 18, 2019 at 5:01 am

    Stupid…. What else can you say? That’s what a 6th grade education gets you. Well at least she didn’t post his cell phone number…..

  • Hate Dindus
    June 18, 2019 at 4:56 am

    Looks to be white, so not a dindu, but still, this is gold.

    • Manheim
      June 18, 2019 at 8:46 am

      Dindus are all black on the inside.

  • With GF's like this, who needs angry exes? lol
    June 18, 2019 at 12:55 am

    I can imagine his reaction.
    Her: “Baby, they tried to talk mad shit about you but I fuckin set em straight! Those bitchass hoes don’t know nuthin!”
    Roidtard Robber Guy: “You did WHAT?!?!?” (Grabs some clothes, stuffing a Market Basket bag, muttering, “what the fuck what the fuck shit, fuck stupid cunt fuck I’m fucked Ohhhh man fuuuuck…”)

    Yes, this young lady is an absolute blessing. Winner of the dry snitch of the year. What a catch.

    • TortugaNiño
      June 18, 2019 at 1:07 am

      Lmao! All im picturing is the scene from Boondock Saints when Rocco busts into the apartment and starts packing vinyl albums and kitchen utensils!!!

      • Y
        June 18, 2019 at 10:23 am

        • TortugaNiño
          June 18, 2019 at 11:08 am

          Thank you kind sir! The iron ended up coming in handy later too didnt it !? Lol

  • Klancy
    June 18, 2019 at 12:43 am

    Where do the Darwin Award nominations go?

  • Said Everyone
    June 18, 2019 at 12:20 am

    TBS gold. Well done

  • True Fall River Glory
    June 18, 2019 at 12:11 am

    Iconic

  • True justice
    June 18, 2019 at 12:08 am

    It’s amazing how many ratchets become tb famous who weren’t the original story. They just comment on social media and the fun begins.

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It