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The Only Thing Funnier Than This City Of Worcester Parody Facebook Page Are The Morons Who Think It’s Real

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A million people have messaged us about this City of Worcester parody Facebook pageTo answer your question – no we had nothing to do with it. But it’s pretty freaking hilarious, so tip of the cap to whoever the anonymous purveyor of satire is. We don’t expect it to be around much longer though, as the Facebook police are no doubt mass reporting it. Because no one is ever allowed to have too much fun on Facebook. Very serious stuff. We screenshotted some of our favorite posts for when this page inevitably gets shut down:

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There’s stop signs at Kelley Square?

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Whoever made this account, first round at Smitty’s Tavern is on Turtleboy just for those posts.

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I am Turtleboy.

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HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! Funny cuz it’s true.

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LOL.

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It’s true. Now all we need are people to go to these places.

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I know this is a joke, but all kidding aside, that’s exactly what the city of Worcester did last summer when they opened up this chain restaurant in the place of another failed chain restaurant.

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Oh. My. God. Best post yet. Anyone who understands what a joke Worcester Magazine has become under the “guidance” of Walter Bird, has to appreciate this one.

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Once again, funny because it’s true. Does anyone NOT have a key to the city at this point? If so, give Joe Petty a call and he’ll hook you up!!

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That’s the least of Kirsch liquors problems.

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Yea, but most of the time it’s just Rick Rushton.

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For real!!! Sorry about the redirects everyone!! We’re actively working on fixing them. In the meantime enjoy your free iPhone that you just won and message that hot Russian girl who is looking for a boyfriend!

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Shots fired!!

The only thing funnier than some of these posts are the people who haven’t figured out that this is a parody account:

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Spit out my coffee when I read that one. Well done sir or madam. Well done indeed. Some people didn’t think it was so funny though:

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Right. The person running this parody account is the “retarded” one. I love irony.

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LOL. Speaking of dumbest things I’ve ever read, awesome post Sersie!! Apparently they don’t teach common sense and general awareness at the Spa Tech Institute Schools of Massage, Esthetics, Polarity and Beauty.

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I don’t even know where to start with this poor guy.

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He’s just so lost.

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I don’t know what is sadder. The fact that this grown man actually believes the city of Worcester is going to imprison the thousands of people who have carved their names into Coney Island booths, or the fact that all these geniuses liked it:

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Me thinks the joke went way above your head!!

And finally there was this:

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Oh for fuck’s sake. Can we make it a law that old people can’t use the Internet? Or maybe they should just have their own separate Internet. Somewhere where they can’t hurt themselves. Although this guy has an interesting theory on the Roberta’s of the world:

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Unfortunately it is all too real. People really think

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Wait…..this guy graduated from WPI and he can’t figure out what a parody page is? I thought you had to be smart to get into WPI. The parody account even replied to him and said, “ugh,” as in “ughhh this poor mother fucker doesn’t understand what satire is.” And he STILL didn’t get the message. Then again when you look at his Facebook page it starts to make sense. He literally sits on Facebook all day, looking for things that offend him so he can report them to Facebook. Unfortunately it hasn’t worked out well thus far:

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Hey Andrew, I know a guy from Fitchburg (who shall go unnamed) who can help you out. He’s got nothing but time and the skill set you’re looking for is literally the only thing he’s ever been good at.

Oh, and Andrew also finds it offensive that Super Markets don’t want ratchets stealing baby formula:

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Because people who don’t want people to steal from them “don’t care about whether babies are adequately fed.”

I love the Internet. Long live the City of Worcester parody Facebook page!!

 

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10 Comment(s)
  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    October 30, 2016 at 8:21 pm

    Neurotypical? Sounds like poor Andrew has some weapons grade autism going on.

  • Ashamed Atholian
    October 30, 2016 at 4:38 am

    I just hope that Andrew’s page is also a parody.

  • Fed up
    October 29, 2016 at 7:21 pm

    Well, the final straw Turtleboy, l have really enjoyed most of the posts but the rise of your most prolific commenters (primarally “BobnMic”) trolling and not even commenting on the article in question plus the incessant “http://appsurveygo.com/surveynow.php?c=giftcard.en&p=770be25df2ce7853b73a348654bf430e&subid=M16127226461477782435469842&t=1477782435” has finished me off. If that’s what you need to make money, good luck cause I’m gone. I have a feeling that I’m not the only one……

    • Jay
      October 29, 2016 at 8:01 pm

      google “ublock origin” if you think the ads are such a problem

      you’re welcome

  • Talisman
    October 29, 2016 at 7:12 pm

    Here’s an idea Glandrew Megut. Maybe if people can’t afford kids, they shouldn’t have them. I know that’s a foreign concept to a turd snacker like yourself, but that’s how people with common sense used to approach starting a family. I hope you read this right before your computer cremates you, you worthless sack of dumbass.

  • JRod
    October 29, 2016 at 6:50 pm

    That Andrew guy has never heard of boobs feeding babies, his mom won’t let him hear about things like that. Most ratchets can’t use them though since they are pierced and covered in scabby tats.

  • Fatfingr Lou
    October 29, 2016 at 5:02 pm

    Good stuff! I had a couple of belly laughs there.

    Now, if only they could make some good school closing/winter snow ban announcements…

  • Turtleboy Customer Service
    October 29, 2016 at 3:41 pm

    For those of you reading at home the “GUY” from fitchburg is none other than the famous Turtleboy villan Kevin’s 9 iron Lynch! Ooh you don’t know who he is….Google his name…………BTW he used to live in Boston! Hint Hint!!

  • Jay-B
    October 29, 2016 at 2:58 pm

    FYI Andrew if you are truly poor and in need with children in the great state of Massachusetts they will provide you with WIC to get it for free! The ppl stealing it are selling it! But you wouldn’t know that living in your safe bubble maybe you shouldn’t talk about shit you know nothing about God I hate ppl! Lmfao love the city of Worcester parody page!

    • Ribbon Cutter
      October 30, 2016 at 9:39 am

      Baby formula is stolen to cut with drugs. And sold Black Market as well.

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