• This Sad Welfare Fox Is What Living In Fitchburg For Two Months Can Do To Anyone



    This Sad Welfare Fox Is What Living In Fitchburg For Two Months Can Do To Anyone

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    A turtle rider messaged us about this sad little fox that’s been roaming around Fitchburg for a couple months now:

    It’s literally eating roadkill in the middle of the street and does not seem to give a shit that there are cars coming and people are watching him. In other words, if he ran for Mayor of Fitchburg he’d still probably get more votes than Kevin Lynch.

    He’s gotten progressively worse over time too. Here he is earlier in the summer:

    This is what a normal fox looks like when to grows up in the woods of Westminster, Ashby, or Lunenburg. Next thing you know it takes a wrong left hand turn and BOOM:

    Fitchburg welfare Fox. This is what two months in Fitchburg does to an animal. Next thing you know he’s gonna be selling food stamps on Facebook and wearing a flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hat. Just ask the sad Fitchburg moose from a couple years ago:

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    That poor gal was enjoying the great outdoors, drinking trout water and eating copious amounts of forest food. Next thing you know he wanders into Fitchburg and all of a sudden she looks like he’s ready to feed herself to a bear.

    Anyway, this thing’s clearly got mange or rabies so he’s probably pretty dangerous. The turtle rider who sent it to us told us that she called the city but they didn’t get there in time. Whatever you do don’t feed this thing or try to catch it. Message this lady instead:

    Or do this:

    Save the Fitchburg welfare fox!!

     

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    Discussion

    1. Poo


      Unlike most of the animals you report on, I actually feel terrible for this one.

    2. Johnny5


      I’d rather fuck that fox than the guttermuppet

    3. Kevin Lynch


      His name is David… and he is Fiiiiiine….

      1. kevi packs a mean 9 iron


        Love your swing baby.

    4. Emily


      That poor little thing. I pray someone can get him/her the help it needs. It obviously has mange. It looks like a baby too, not full grown.
      Heartbreaking

    5. Stunt Penis


      Is the fox on meth or heroin?

      I’m going to guess heroin only because I can’t see if it has meth mouth.

      1. bigdaddy


        I would say more like fentanyl

    6. Peckerwood


      Someone needs to put that thing down, its suffering. A .22 to the head would be painless, compared to what it going thru now. Either way, it’s going to die, how long must it suffer is the question.

    7. Walt Rogers


      Keep that foxes name out your mouth. You have no right to judge, you dont know what its been through, so gimme a break. Only god can judge that fox.

      If this post isnt taken down by 9Am tomorrow, the fox will be calling Maura Healey personally.

      1. Itsjustme


        FACKS.

    8. ElJefe72


      Free my boi!!!! 100% FACKS!!!

    9. Wannabe


      The poor Fox could possibly be nursed back to physical health however the summer spent is Fitchburg has surely caused so much emotional pain and suffering and irreparable damage to his or her mental state that the only merciful thing to do is to put down!

    10. Tony Orlando


      Clearly fox lives don’t matter

    11. Free Trapper


      Shoulda trapped that thing when it’s pelt was still good. Fuckin thing looks like roadkill now. Somebody’s gotta shoot it before it gets something else sick.

      1. HHH


        ” before it gets something else sick.”

        Remember, it is in FITCHBURG.
        Poor thing caught “Fitchburg.”
        It is probably the healthiest thing around.

      2. kevi packs a mean 9 iron


        Why all the down votes? Clearly you don’t get it.

    12. Sue


      Animals have no voice to ask for help, the sicker they get the more vicious they can become. Please help this animal get the help that he/she needs. animals are as innocent as children and just as helpless.

      1. HHH


        ” animals are as innocent as children”…except children are human, and animals are…animals.
        Time to call DCF – Department of Children and Foxes.

    13. chrissy


      OMFG the title of this post is too funny,
      and you scroll through the sad pics and get to the comment section and the comments are hilarious enough to keep you from crying:

      “The poor Fox could possibly be nursed back to physical health however the summer spent is Fitchburg has surely caused so much emotional pain…..”

      and Sue is right!

    14. HHH


      Have you seen those billboards with the before and after photos of meth users?

      The towns bordering FItchburg should put up similar signs with the before Fitchburg / after Fitchburg fox photos, as a warning.

      BTW – What, no Go Fund Me for the fox, yet?

      Best TBS column in a long time!

    15. whatevuh


      Christ, just shoot the fucking thing, what’s wrong with you people

    16. kevi packs a mean 9 iron


      “In other words, if he ran for Mayor of Fitchburg he’d still probably get more votes than Kevin Lynch. ”

      Just gold!

    17. wabbitt


      Things have sure gone downhill for Tod since the Widow Tweed passed away…

    18. Nancy


      My husband said its a fox that makes 5 dollars to much to be on welfare.. Because if he was on welfare he’d be overweight!

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