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Yesterday we broke the story about how some slug rakes tried to ruin Christmas for underprivileged kids by robbing the Toys for Tots van outside of the Lucky Dog Music Hall in Worcester during a fundraiser Saturday night. We encouraged people to go down and donate at 5 PM Sunday to show these a-holes that good will always defeat evil. And the Turtleboy Sports Revolution showed the world that we are a force of nature that cannot be reckoned with.

Over 150 people ended up showing up, bearing over 500 toys. And not just crappy welfare toys that kids don’t really want either. We’re talking REALLY good toys. Way better toys than I ever had growing up. The Lucky Dog owners – Bill Luff and Erick Godin – even showed that panhandling can be put to good use when it’s not being done to subsidize the local heroine dealer. Local Worcester boob Ben Pultorak stood in the street for several hours, in the freezing cold mind you, collecting money from the good folks of Worcester:

Altogether they raised over $2,000. When it was all said and done they had collected FIVE TIMES the amount of toys they initially had. Ya got that? FIVE FREAKING TIMES!! That’s insane. Worcester gets a lot of shit because of stories like Busgate and idiot protesters who like to stand in front of traffic for no reason. But these are the types of stories that define what communities are REALLY all about. These are the people in Worcester who are making a difference.

The kids that get these presents are gonna have a Turtleboy Christmas to remember and it’s all because of you people. Words can’t express how proud I am of the turtle riders. Turtleboy gives back might just be a theme we put to good use more often.

And if you want further proof why Turtleboy Sports should be your go-to source for all takes on sports and local news, your local newspaper, the Telegram and Gazette, FINALLY reported this story in today’s paper…..24 hours late:

The reason we knew about this story is because people contacted us about it. I woke up yesterday and had four separate messages about it. So in the future, if you EVER have any information or leads on ANYTHING like this, then send us a message and we’ll cover it. The reason you wanna come to Turtleboy is simple – hot takes is what we do here. It’s why we exist. You can get news and lukewarm/timid takes from the mainstream media. But when you need to stay warm through the cold winter nights your only option is to ride the turtle.

So I went down to the Lucky Dog at 1:00 today to check out what the generosity looked like because the Marines were there to load up the toys. It was simply an orgasmic display of generosity. A lovely lady I met named Sharon Parlee had contacted Channel 4 so they were down there to get some video for the 6 PM news as well. For whatever reason the Telegram and Gazette was nowhere to be seen. Apparently because they had to break the HUGE story about this idiot who stole cologne at the Auburn Mall:

Local nudnik steals cologne. Real hot take ya got there. Take a lap Telegram, you’re drunk. Meanwhile check out all these delicious toys!!

They just kept jamming the UHAUL with toys until the sucker was filled with Christmas Joy!!

Yankees fans have souls? I learn something new every day!!

Then they started jamming up the second truck with bags of toys, led by Bill Luff

Erick Godin

Sharon Parlee

and of course the United States Marines:

Oh yea, and the Lucky Dog girls are some bad ass babes; carrying boxes full of toys that were twice their body weight.

They lift things up and put them down. Safe to say they would be kicked out of Planet Fitness in five minutes at most. Diesel.

Oh yea, and you know who didn’t donate squat? Professor Sonya Conner, “community activists” like Robert Blackwell-Gibbs, the ACLU, and every Clark dingleberry that Occupied Lincoln Square two weeks ago. None of them were there. Because unlike their idiotic protests, this show of generosity actually accomplished something positive.

It just proves what I’ve been saying from the beginning. The protesters are just selfish. They’re marching through the streets and blocking traffic because it’s the cool thing to do. None of them could give two shits about Eric Garner or Michael Brown. None of them have any goals or objectives or are willing to do something that ACTUALLY makes a difference for the community.

And they shit on Turtleboy readers and call us racist because we don’t want our streets jammed full of hippies during rush hour. Meanwhile the vast silent majority out there are good hearted people that want to help others, and it showed today. These are the people who are really making a difference. These are the people who ride the turtle.

P.S. It would be really bad ass if the Turtleboy Sports Revolution somehow figured out who robbed the van so these dingbats can be brought to justice. If you have any tips call the WPD non-emergency number (508-799-8606, NOT 911). Keep an eye out for places like Craigslist, but please, for the love of God, don’t go around accusing anyone on there of being the thief. If something looks suspicious just tell the police and let them do their jobs. They do it quite well, despite what the Clark hippies say:

Camilo, Paul, and Vaske – really good at calling people racist, not very good at helping kids have a merry Christmas.

Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.

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Check out more hot takes from Dubsism