All-Star Criminals

White Trash Hero Wears T-Shirt With His Mugshot On It From Last Time He Was Arrested At Latest Mugshot Photoshoot

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(Source) 19-year-old last week posed for a jail booking photo while wearing a t-shirt with a reproduction of the mug shot taken of him after a June arrest for drunk driving. Robert Burt was busted for operating under the influence and driving without a license. Burt, a resident of the central Maine town of Pittsfield, posed for a June 14 booking photo (seen below) at the Somerset County Jail. He was wearing a white t-shirt and held a slate in his right hand. After copping a drunk driving plea, Burt was ordered to spend two days in custody, beginning August 8 at 6 PM. “Going to do my 48 hours whoo,” Burt announced on Facebook two hours before surrendering. When he later arrived at the jail, Burt was searched, directed to pose for a mug shot, and shown to a cell. He was especially prepared for the booking photo session. As seen in the above mug shot (click to enlarge), a coworker of Burt’s at a Pittsfield restaurant created a shirt with a reproduction of the booking photo taken following his mid-June arrest. The t-shirt photo was captioned “Burt Family Reunion 8/8-8/10/2014” and “sponsored by Bud Light and Somerset County Sheriff.”



I don’t care that this kid is the definition of Maine white trash. I don’t care that that is the ugliest Worcester Voke-stache I’ve ever seen. I don’t care if that stache is a giant clump of hair that feel off of his unibrow. I don’t care that this kid is allergic to shampoo and conditioner. I don’t care that he’s using the alias “Robert Burk” and his real name is Shane. I don’t care that he most likely can’t read and lives in a trailer. I should care that a 19 year old just got busted for DUI and apparently gives zero fucks about it.

But I just don’t. And it’s all because of that t-shirt. This is easily the greatest power move in the history of the mugshot game. Because let’s be honest, my boy Shane here definitely knew he was gonna do a little time in prison at some point in his life. I would’ve guessed that his first stint would come from not paying child support, or beating the bag out of his girlfriend for overcooking the squirrel. But DUI was a strong third. So he’s pretty much been planning for this moment ever since he realized that the drunk tank was gonna be his second home.

A lot of people know they’re on a crash course with prison, but none of those dooshnozzles made T-shirts with their mugshots on them in anticipation of their next mugshot. So for that reason, we here at Turtleboy Sports salute you Shane. Never change.

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