WTF

Sesame Queef Mom Names Her Kid Abcde Then Whines On Viral Facebook Post After Southwest Employee Laughs At Terrible Name On Facebook

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I cannot stop laughing at the latest viral Facebook post:

The two biggest crimes committed here were, 1) the airline employee who posted those pictures has a shared Facebook account (which one do you think cheated?), and 2) this basic Becky named her raw dog trophy ABCDE.

Bitch, who gave you that idea? The Jackson 5? Elmo? What’s her brother’s names? LMFAO and GTFO? She seems like a nice girl though. Maybe when she gets older I can introduce her to my son FGHIJ.

Of course she has to mention that her kid has epilepsy, which has absolutely nothing to do with the reason this employee laughed at her kid’s name with their friends on Facebook. Mom did this to try to subliminally stick it in your head that her kid was extra victimized by this, when in fact she would never even see it since five year olds aren’t on Facebook. They weren’t laughing at your kid’s epilepsy, they were laughing at her name. Because it’s terrible. And YOU gave it to her. You’re the one being mocked here, and you totally deserve it.

Comment of the day goes to Craig.

I’m not gonna lie, if I saw that ticket the first thing I’d think was that the company fucked up when they printed the seat on the boarding pass.

How da fuq you gonna name your kid ABCDE and not foresee this problem happening? God, I hate these people who treat their crotch fruits like they’re the changing room at Macy’s. This ain’t experiment time. This is a human being we’re dealing with here, and they get one name for life unless they’re Apple Daddy’s kids in which case they’re forced to become transgender. These are the same people who go to Pearl Jam concerts and tell them to play Leatherman so they can do something to prove they’re deep thinkers. Meanwhile everyone else is drunk and just wants to here Alive.

Just give your kid a normal name so they can lead a normal life and not constantly be made fun of. If you have to explain the pronunciation of your kid’s name because for some reason the vowel doesn’t come until the last letter of their name, then you’re an asshole. Instead of naming your kid Bohemian Absidee, just call her Jessica so she can grow up to become a stripper like everyone else from El Paso. You gave your kid that name for you, not for them. YOU wanted to feel special and brag to your friends about how you came up with an original name that no one else named their little tax breaks. You didn’t once think about how they’re gonna have to go through 13 years of schools without meeting anyone who doesn’t instinctively sing their name.

In fairness, it’s kind of fucked that this employee is taking pictures of people and posting like that, but on the other hand, free speech. That shit is funny. Where would we be without People of Walmart and the Jersey Shore? We need shit in our lives to laugh at in order to be reassured that there are other people out there more fucked up than us.

I’m a free speech absolutist. When someone isn’t working they should be allowed to post whatever they want on their own Facebook page because they’re acting as a private citizen. I’m aware that this is not the world we’re living in, and that private employers have the right to terminate you for whatever reason they want. But if I’m dictator of the world this is the first rule I’m instituting – no one can get fired for shit they post on Facebook.

Either way, the irony of this all is too delicious. Here we have an attention seeking mother, who claims she’s totes not an attention seeking mother, and says she’s upset that her kid’s information is out there. So what does she do? Posts her kid’s information on her public Facebook page and encourages strangers to share it. Makes sense.

The comments on the post got funnier the longer it was up, but at first the angry mom mafia was all fired up.

A disgrace to humanity!! Can’t you just feel the LUV?

This Internet lawsuit brigade was out in full force.

Stuped workered!!!

What are you gonna sue them over? Posting your kid’s real name on the Internet? They didn’t post her medical information, just her stupid name that her stupid mother gave her.

Evidently this is “bullying” and “harassment” of a child, even though harassment involves making actual contact with the person who is being harassed.

HAHAHAHHA!!! Seriously, I laugh out loud every single time one of these Angelina Holy’s refers to the child as ABCDE all casually. How can anyone type that with a straight face? I have a hard time not capitalizing them all when I write it. Then again, from writing for Turtleboy for a while now I’ve noticed that one of the first signs that you’re dealing with a ratchet is when they think “lose” is spelt “loose.” Bitch, loose is what your morals are when you grow up in Lawrence. Lose is what you do when you grow up in Lawrence.

Then came the HIPPA patrol.

Good point. Because working in the medical field and being the chick who rips your ticket for Southwest Airline are the same thing. Good point.

The bottom line is Mom is an attention seeking chick from Texas who gave her kid a horrible name without thinking ahead and realizing the inevitability of this eventually happening. It’s only gonna get worse for poor ABCDE from here.

43 Comment(s)
  • Stunt Penis
    November 30, 2018 at 10:28 am

    I want to name my kid with a 3-D bar code.

    What law states we are required to use the roman alphabet when it comes to names?

    BTW: Wood, in a heartbeat.

    • YOLO MA
      December 1, 2018 at 12:01 am

      When I first saw this story I thought it was some foreign name
      and knew people would be screaming racist.
      Now I realize it’s just a stupid made-up name.
      Get used to it lady, your kid will be dealing with this for a LONG time.

  • North west, Chicago, stormy. RETARD
    November 30, 2018 at 6:42 am

    Mommy all over the news. She still don’t get she is the asshole here, who is the reason her child will be laughed at forever

  • DJ
    November 29, 2018 at 10:33 pm

    Lol just another dumb mother trying to be all cute with their kid name but in reality is just a dumb fucking idiot. Like naming your little baby girl Female pronounced fe-mah-lay…. Or Nevaeh which us heaven backwards..fucking dumb. I hate people that try so hard to be different and then get pissed when people make fun of them. Dumb bug eyed ratchet whore.. Abcde dumb dumb dumb

  • ... --- ...
    November 29, 2018 at 10:23 pm

    Reminds me of the kindergarten teacher who’s student was named La-sha.
    Big momma had to come in and explain that “the dash don’t be silent”.
    True story.

    • juror seven esq.
      November 30, 2018 at 8:53 pm

      When I first saw the lead on this I thought the woman had five kids and named them A, B, C, D and E. After reading the article that was not the case. However, that would have made more sense than what this woman did.

    • juror seven esq.
      November 30, 2018 at 8:57 pm

      Laughed for 5 minutes over this comment, the dah don’t be silent,

  • I like to fuck crazy but...
    November 29, 2018 at 8:32 pm

    This is one broad that I may consider using a condom with even if she showed me a clean std test and proved she had an iud.

  • Lee Kingsnatch
    November 29, 2018 at 8:30 pm

    My japanese parents gave me an american name upon moving to america! And even changed my last name to appear more American! God bless Absidee!

  • Me
    November 29, 2018 at 6:08 pm

    Meh to the name. Sadly, it isnt uncommon. 328 people found with the same name… poor kids.

    The employee did it on the clock, which is wrong. I love the pics and shit, but dont do it while on the clock. That’s dumb.

    So we have 2 dumass’s

  • Jim
    November 29, 2018 at 4:47 pm

    Why not name her 12345?

  • Stupid mommy
    November 29, 2018 at 2:51 pm

    She is a cruel mother and did not think at all about that baby when she named it. Disgusting. As Frank Rizzo said, I hope she is smart enough to call herself Abby also.

    • Jim
      November 29, 2018 at 4:48 pm

      She needed a way to remember her email password

  • In ten years
    November 29, 2018 at 2:45 pm

    What a piece of shit! Get to the town hall and change your child’s name. Your child will hate you if you don’t.

  • United
    November 29, 2018 at 1:40 pm

    I have Chron’s. Do I get to preboard too?

    • You idiot
      December 3, 2018 at 11:59 pm

      Yeah, sure you do.
      Can’t even spell it right, you twunt.
      Wouldn’t it be a karmic delight if you developed Crohn’s?

  • Chanda Lear
    November 29, 2018 at 12:39 pm

    Perfect example of why some nations have laws banning certain names and can force dumb asses like this one to legally change them.

  • Noname
    November 29, 2018 at 11:58 am

    No public assistance for you.

  • VWXYZ
    November 29, 2018 at 11:42 am

    If you’re considering giving your kid stupid names because you need the attention then you better do the following:
    *Get therapy BEFORE you name the child.
    *Assume people will make fun of it and put yourself in the kid’s place having to put up with that. Most parents are bummed when their kid is teased. Try to not be selfish for a minute.
    If you do go through with giving a stupid name:
    *Get therapy.
    *Get thicker skin.
    *Get that kid into therapy.
    *Get the kid into martial arts so they have the confidence to stand up to the relentless taunting. Because we know that won’t learn survival skills from you.

    When you are inconsiderate enough to do this to your kid you don’t get to complain about anyone making fun. You are the one who made them a joke.

    And why does anyone fly SW? It seems like a nightmare anyway. When flying a budget airline don’t expect 1st class service.

  • Hai Rykunte
    November 29, 2018 at 11:11 am

    What’s wrong with Abcde?

    Now, Abcdef would be stupid.

    • Stu Pidphuk
      November 29, 2018 at 11:14 am

      Your write. But, Edcba.

      • Stu Pidphuk
        November 29, 2018 at 11:16 am

        Oopsies.

        forgot the “is wurst”.

    • Lala
      November 29, 2018 at 11:03 pm

      Ok you had me till you starting knocking Southwest!! Come on man?? Southwest is the bomb!!! You know how many times (all the time) I have flown round trip to south Florida for under $200? 2 free.bags (checked) , plus a carry on, flight date changes are free. The seats are the same as Delta.

      I would call Southwest midline honestly. If I didn’t mind paying $400+ (on a good day) to fly; with my two suitcases and change my date when I wanted I’d fly Delta, I guess just kidding…No I wouldn’t lmao I’m not stupid! I’ll keep flying Southwest and pocket the extra $200.
      Seriously though, you must not fly to Florida or you just got it like that, in which case more power to you my friend.

  • Ess Jay Double U
    November 29, 2018 at 10:36 am

    Another attention seeking moron bitch. Great job naming your kid mommy blogger, SJW protest alert.

  • meep
    November 29, 2018 at 10:11 am

    If you pronounce it like she wants (ahbeesidee) it sounds like Obesity, which im sure was actually what she meant to name the child after she looked into the foggy magic ball that is her future and saw the fat fat mc fatty future, Fat ass.

  • Randall Guy
    November 29, 2018 at 9:56 am

    I just sent an email to her work to get her fired.

  • Frank Rizzo
    November 29, 2018 at 9:28 am

    hopefully the child will be smart enough to start telling people her name is abby

  • Bitterman
    November 29, 2018 at 9:10 am

    That she would fly Southwest with a young child says everything. No I will not give up my window seat in row 6 so that cheap bitch can sit next to her kid.

  • Wallace J Bird Esq.
    November 29, 2018 at 8:24 am

    Like a screen door in a hurricane

  • FGHIJ (Fuh-GEEDGE)
    November 29, 2018 at 7:32 am

    Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Don’t be surprised when people laugh because you needed to feel special by giving your poor kid a ridiculous fucking name.

    I’m so glad my parents had enough foresight to give me a solid, classic American stripper name instead of this bullshit.

  • Independent Thinker
    November 29, 2018 at 7:17 am

    Before naming your kid, you should think about what impact this name will have on his life. Will others in school make fun of him because of his name? If so, then it is probably the wrong name. When he is applying for a job, will recruiters pass over his resume because of his name? If so, then it is the wrong name. Unfortunately, selfish, SJW’s, will not look at things in this manner.

  • WeAreFukd
    November 29, 2018 at 7:09 am

    Dumbest name ever. Abcde & that couple on Seinfeld that named their kid “Seven.”

    But I don’t think the employee should be posting pictures that are mocking passengers of her employer. Sure, do it on your own time, at your own activities.

    Can you imagine if Walmart had a Facebook page featuring all the funny shit the store cameras see everyday? Great entertainment, but not good for business.

  • Ellem N. Op
    November 29, 2018 at 6:25 am

    I see nothing wrong with that name

    • Frank Rizzo
      November 29, 2018 at 9:26 am

      ellem n op hahaha

  • I see dumb people
    November 29, 2018 at 6:18 am

    Anyone else notice this bitch has the same crazy look as the MOTSS Cult ( mothers of the south shore) Freak? ? Crazy does have a certain look to it hahhaha

  • Whensilencefails
    November 29, 2018 at 6:01 am

    I actually like the name 

  • WTF, over?????
    November 29, 2018 at 5:51 am

    Hey NSTB……loved this article…..when I saw it on Barstool.
    Coincidence they posted it just before you did????????

  • M
    November 29, 2018 at 4:27 am

    Just wait till this kid starts school, then she will know what real bullying is. Poor kid.

    • Yuck
      November 29, 2018 at 7:30 am

      Gonna add an interesting twist to those youngsters learning their ABCs!

  • The Vorlon
    November 29, 2018 at 12:44 am

    You know how they say “see something, say something”?

    I see stupid parents.

    The poor girl’s only hope is to look the bullys in the eye and inform them “We pronounce it ‘Amy'”

  • Bob
    November 29, 2018 at 12:26 am

    Stupid name and if the employee just laughed, then that would be perfectly normal. But to then post online as well as post numerous other pictures, making fun of other passengers. She should be fired. It’s freedom of speech, so she shouldn’t be arrested, but she has no business working at an airline, dealing with customers.

    • Y
      November 29, 2018 at 12:47 am

      Murchison?

  • Y
    November 28, 2018 at 11:33 pm

    I thought I saw it all…that is until I saw this virtue-signaling Can’t Understand Normal Thinking excuse of a mother.
    Aye dios mio, did she honestly think her fuck trophy would go thru life unscathed with a name like Absinthe?
    Where’s the cuck husband?
    Dumb question…he’s at Sweaty Betty’s begging Ms. Behavior for a snail trail.
    Everyone involved will be on GoFundMe and seeking legal advice from Atty. Richard N. Vulva, Esq. just in time to (atypically) beg for Christmas handouts.
    Fuck this world.
    We need a ratchet tax.

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