Social Justice Warriors

Barstool Sports: Dude Who Won Women’s Cycling Race Is Brave And So Is Rihanna For Not Singing Super Bowl National Anthem To Support Colin Kaepernick

Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Returns, and TB Rider to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:







Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship.


Last week we published this blog about some Barstool Sports diversity hire who made a video after the Red Sox beat the Yankees in which she pretended to give a shit about sports by ranting and using vulgarity in a really edgy manner.

Predictably there was a lot of this kind of commentary:

“Turtle fucker wishes he was Barstool. They’re valued at a billion dollars. You’re just jealous.”

Of course I’m jealous of a billion dollar company. I’m jealous that the Huffington Post makes bank and Occupy Democrats still has a Facebook page. Doesn’t mean we’re not gonna call out bullshit when we see it.

One thing I can promise turtle riders we will never, ever do, is sell out like Barstool has. Don’t get me wrong, I greatly admire what Dave Portnoy built brick by brick over there. I used to love Barstool, but since they got bought out by the Chenin Group they’ve become Huffstool. It’s all SJW takes all the time. If they blogged 15 years ago about the garbage they’re blogging today, no one would know what Barstool Sports was. Here’s two headlines from yesterday:

One blog from “Gay Pat,” shitting on a woman who was mad that a man beat her in an athletic competition, and another blog from their token diversity hire Liz Gonzalez kissing Rihanna’s ass for refusing to sing at the Super Bowl over Colin Kaepernick. Let’s check out Gay Pat’s blog first.

It starts off with a tweet from the WOMAN who finished in third place, behind the dude:

This woman’s beef is completely legitimate. “Social justice” almost always comes at the expense of women. Because of this insanely illogical idea that it’s fair for men to call themselves women and compete against real women in sports, women now must suffer as a result. The only thing that matters are this man’s feelings. It’s all about him. He has to feel good about himself, and everyone else can fuck off. That’s the politically incorrect take. Here’s Gay Pat’s take:

She may not have come right out and said she didn’t deserve to lose, but that’s what she was alluding to. She was upset she lost to a trans woman, so instead of being a good sport and taking it on the chin, she bitched about how unfair it was on Twitter.

No, she was upset that she lost to a dude. She shouldn’t have to be a “good sport” and take this sitting down. She bitched about how unfair it was, because it was in fact unfair.

The good news is that Rachel saw all this coming and has not only maintained a positive attitude throughout, but also stood up for herself in the process. Whether or not you agree with her stance, you have to respect her balls.

No, I don’t have to respect his literal balls. Any dude could do what he did. The idea that I’m supposed respect a man who beats up on women because he’s got a mental illness is so PC it hurts.

Luckily, the vast majority is focusing on the positive side of this story.

Oh good, the mainstream media thinks this is a positive thing and Barstool agrees. Meanwhile, Barstool rose to prominence by fighting back against PC culture. Now they’re officially part of the PC mob.

So much so that Jennifer has issued an apology via Twitter.

See that? That is what actual suppression of women looks like. This lady trained her ass off to get where she is. She put in her blood, sweat and tears, and then at the last moment a dude said he was a chick and took it from her. And not only is she not allowed to be upset about this, she has to apologize for being mad about it and not congratulating the man who beat her.

Here was Gay Pat’s take on her apology:

Thanks, but no thanks, Jenny. Train harder next time and maybe you won’t end up in third place. And congratulations to Rachel on the win. Keep doing what you’re doing.

Good point Gay Pat. The woman should just “train harder” to beat the man. Who knew it was that easy? We’ve been separating biological men from women in sports for so long because we thought men were bigger stronger and faster. Turns out women are all just losers who don’t work hard enough.

At the end of the day what just happened here is a dude “mansplained” to a woman why she’s a bad person for being upset that another man beat her in a women’s athletic competition. This isn’t being liberal. It’s radical leftist insanity, and what Barstool is really all about now.

Oh, and if you vote Yes on Question 3 in two weeks, this is coming to a high school near you.

Here’s the Rihanna blog about the pop star refusing to sing at the Super Bowl to show solidarity for a backup quarterback who started a protest for reasons he knows nothing about, but only after he was demoted to backup duty:

This isn’t about politics. It doesn’t matter what side you’re on or how far you lean left or right: this is about staying true to your principles, regardless of the consequences. It’s tough to stand your ground when everyone around you disagrees with you, when everyone is telling you you’re wrong. I can’t imagine it’s easy to give up the prestige of performing at the Super Bowl halftime just because you disagree with the NFL’s stance on kneeling. Most people would be quick to shut up and sing in order to reach million of households in one night.

Not Rihanna, though.

Rihanna is a woman of principle, and even if you don’t agree with her, you have to respect the hell out of her. Most of us don’t have that kind of discipline or loyalty to our beliefs.

This is literally the Huffington Post. You could get the exact same take there. She was two seconds away from saying, “speak her truths.”

I have to respect a millionaire for not singing a song? The only thing this fraud Rihanna hates is America, the country that enabled her to make millions of dollars while sounding like a tree frog being finger-blasted in a vacuum cleaner.

Newsflash Diversity Debbie – Rihanna never roots for America. That’s why she’s not singing our anthem. During the 2014 World Cup she literally rooted for every single team that the USA was playing against:

How stupid do you have to be to believe that everyone around Rihanna disagrees with her decision? These are celebrities. They live in an echo chamber. They gave Bruce Jenner a courage award for putting on a dress. She will be lauded for her wokeness for years to come. This is what they do – they constantly try to out virtue signal each other.

The funny part is how Portnoy still acts like they’re the bad boys of the Internet, standing up to the PC police, when in reality they are the PC police.

I wanna laugh when sites like Deadspin attack Barstool for being too politically incorrect. Everything they reference in their hit pieces is shit that he tweeted ten years ago. Huffstool is the new Barstool. Portnoy knows that, and he thanks the good lord every time one of these SJW websites goes after him for being politically incorrect because it makes people believe that they’re still doing the same shit they were doing 10 years ago.

I really believe that Portnoy just doesn’t care anymore because he’s so loaded, and that this is all part of his plan. He does the pizza reviews and cares about the podcasts. The blogs themselves are written by a bunch of millenial SJWs I’ve never heard of before, and there’s only one reason people click on them – to shit on the bloggers in the comments. It’s genius actually, because Huffstool makes the same amount of money from hate clicks that they did when people clicked on the blogs to read actual entertaining content.

18 Comment(s)
  • Too Tall Tim
    Too Tall Tim
    October 23, 2018 at 3:31 am

    Attention Social Justice Warriors!
    Where is the justice for the actual woman who (should have) won the Woman’s Cycling Race?

  • Akihito
    October 21, 2018 at 2:28 am

    Gay pat? Isn’t that something that gets fags arrested in airport mensrooms?

  • That’s what Barstool is?
    October 19, 2018 at 9:02 pm

    I’ve heard all about barstool over the years but I never read any of it until now. I was convinced that I was missing out on something but I only have so much free time and I pretty much blow that free time between here, liveleak, and zerohedge. I’m so happy that I never got invested in something that turned into the shit I just read.

  • Lily White
    October 19, 2018 at 6:15 pm

    Now I am not speaking about all black youth. A few of those deaths were not called for, but most were unpreventable. If you attack or threaten the police, they WILL use their weapons. If they do not (for fear of losing their job, pensions, and freedom,) unfortunately, they may very well end up dead like Officer Chesna who chose to avoid using his gun most likely for the reasons mentioned. White cop. Non-white criminal. Do the math.

    As for Rihanna. She’s a millionaire who has to maintain her blackness to be relevant. So screw her AND Beyonce. As for Colin Kaepernick. If he didn’t suck as much as he DOES, he’d be relevant, and wouldn’t have to take a knee to get on camera and have his name in the news. Fuck ’em all.

  • Polar Bear
    October 19, 2018 at 4:37 pm

    Liz Gonzales needs to shut the fuck up and get back in the kitchen before she gets a pimp hand sandwich that’ll knock the hair off her lip. Know your role, puta.

  • Sir Wilfred Death
    October 19, 2018 at 4:29 pm

    Barstool is on the way down. TBS is on the way up. That’s clear by the quality and honesty of the content on TBS.

    Big companies used to be ruthlessly agnostic about making money. They never shit deliberately on their stockholders or customer base. That has changed over the years. Now billionaire leftists have grabbed hold of some of the biggest corporations, including mass media, and have decided to use them for their political propaganda. Profit and margin are willingly sacrificed in their crusade to marginalize us. Barstool is not the first. Look at The Washington Post.

    It sucks that they have funding levels and diversity hiring that rivals NPR. It’s not fair. But you are a light in the darkness. Despite the technical problems and the occasional fuck up like the dog day care fiasco. You took down the MSP for fuck’s sake. Huge social contribution to a terminally sick state.

    Get over Barstool. Don’t let your bloggers steal from them like yesterday. It undercuts the argument. They suck and are just the CNN of blogs. Let them dry up an blow away on their own. Barstool is the new Air America.

    Now get out their and flog Gregg Bates, find some more politicians banging in meth parks, and find us the next Ginger Gumby.

  • Seneca
    October 19, 2018 at 4:20 pm

    Back in the day, the comments section of Barstool was 300,000 times better than Barstool itself. The comment guys would totally bust on the actual writers – “blog island” or something like that.

    True story.

    TB is different, though. TB could actually become the antidote to major market news outlets. Your partnership with Howard Lawrence Cahhhhhhhhhh was an outstanding step in that direction.

    If you keep on busting the layabouts and the cheaters and the a-holes who deserve to get called out, you’re going to be far bigger and more important than BSS.


    I don’t know what platform you built this site on, or what your strategy is, but the former sucks and the latter is going to end up costing you return readership. It ain’t rocket surgery, lads. Get some UX bubbas on this thing.

    • Sir Wilfred Death
      October 19, 2018 at 5:16 pm

      This has gone on long enough. I think that Uncle Turtleboy owes his readers and donors an explanation of his plan to fix this web site. It’s really not that complicated. If necessary have a drive and I guarantee a lot of us will kick in. This is not just a small issue. It is clearly driving people away.

      We all deserve better.

  • Big Lou
    October 19, 2018 at 3:22 pm

    Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side.

  • Maggie the Cat
    October 19, 2018 at 3:13 pm

    So if a race is supposed to be for women but only trannys show up, is it still a women’s race?
    Or will the tranny bitches have to conduct a hair-pulling contest to see who really won the race?

  • Paul
    October 19, 2018 at 2:58 pm

    You need to worry about TB not Barstool. Taking shots at them only makes you look desperate. You have a different angle all together than they do and there’s room for you to succeed on your own merits.

  • Alyssa Kleinman
    October 19, 2018 at 2:56 pm

    Hi, I do not know how else to contact you, so I hope you see this. Can you please help me find the best home for my dog? I can no longer take care of him due to a combination of my disabilities and life stress, obviously I wish I could keep him forever, but that’s impossible. He deserves to be in a happy home with kids that will be playful with him.

  • sjw-alpha females and cuck males
    October 19, 2018 at 2:53 pm

    Slowly slams head on kitchen table in slow rhythmic motion.

  • Y
    October 19, 2018 at 2:44 pm

    Barstool is way too commercialized and PC.
    The only good bloggers are Large and The Wonton Don.
    Yes, I spend my time there to shit on the other liberal cucks and to look at the Smokeshows.
    I would spend more time on TBS, but you only release 1-3 stories a day.

  • randiguy2006
    Randall Guy
    October 19, 2018 at 2:30 pm

    Must kill you that you’re such a Portnoy wanna be.

    • King Kong Kock
      October 19, 2018 at 4:38 pm

      Hang out as long as you want. Your hatred is fucking delicious as your daughter’s fresh little pussy.

  • Beam Me Up
    October 19, 2018 at 2:24 pm


    At Birth

    Penis = Man
    Vag = Chick

    We are doomed

    Ps Barstool has sucked for years starting when the paper boxes ended

Comment on this Post


Angry White Folk Are Calling This UMass Basketball “White Water” Video Reverse Racism
Jesse Jackson: Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson Is Worse Than Rosa Parks Bus Driver
Did Minnesota Vikings Fire Chris Kluwe Because He Supported Gay Marriage, or Because He Was a Liquored Up Idiot Punter?