Greetings turtle riders. Bret and I will be going live tonight at 9:00 for our regularly scheduled, award winning program. Click here to subscribe to our channel on our march to 7,000 subs. One of the topics we will no doubt be discussing is the video that Josh Abrams uploaded on Friday, in which he illegally wiretaps his own probation officer, and then pulled down shortly after realizing how badly he fucked up. You can fast forward to the 38:30 mark because all he does before that is bullshit and beg for money for his canteen fund.
The best part is that he thinks his probation officer Vanessa Banks is on his side. Bruh, she’s not your lawyer. She’s there to turn you in if you violate any aspects of your probation, which you did by illegally recording her on your live stream without telling her that. It started with this lie:
“I’m recording this, just because, for my records.”
No, you’re recording this so you can live stream it on YouTube and make money off of advertisements. You don’t have records. You have shit written on your hand in magic marker.
He called her up because people have been accusing him of lying about passing drug tests every day, since not even a degenerate like him would be tested every day. But unfortunately for him it turned into one of the greatest self owns of all time.
Bitch Tits: “Someone told me that I have to get drug tested every day now, and they said I had to pay for it or something like that.”
PO: “Who told you that? Why are you calling daily?”
Bitch Tits: “My number has been coming up every single day.”
PO: “You’re missing the no shows and everything. We call you, so.”
Bitch Tits: “Someone told me I have to pay for these tests.”
PO: “Don’t listen to people on the streets.”
Bitch Tits: “Besides the miss test, because I’m trying to combat some people saying that they have to be paid for and I’m not paying them, I’m failing drug tests. Besides the test that I missed in Chicago and you were notified, during my period of probation which has been for quite some time now, I have no failed any drug tests.”
PO: “Joshua come in, I’m not talking about this on the phone. Come in, I’ll be here Monday.”
Bitch Tits: “Could you confirm just for my records that I have not failed any tests.”
PO: Click.
Things that were confirmed from that conversation:
- He lied that he calls them every day – they call him when it’s time to get tested
- He missed a test to go to Chicago
- His probation officer hates him and is sick of his bullshit
Things the were not confirmed from that confirmation:
- Josh hasn’t failed a drug test while on probation
How awesome would it be if he goes back to jail for this because he violated his probation by wiretapping his OWN PROBATION OFFICER??!! I’ll have a lot more to say about this tonight, so tune in at 9 PM. See ya then!
Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:
Follow us on Youtube, SoundCloud, Twitter, and Facebook.
Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy:
50 Comment(s)
Great news; bitch tits was arrested last night:
I just don’t understand why no one has busted his face open on a regular basis, what an annoying fukwad
I wish these updates came with more substantial roasting. I think at this point it’s just beating a dead, faggy horse. If more fun information comes up then I’ll be reading, otherwise this c-sucking weirdo has to much real estate on this website.
#freemyday
i totally disagree. I love the updates. I also wish there was more substantial investigations and stories on Patrick & Earl, and the auditing community in general. Tboy said there would be a recurring topic of “Auditing the Auditors”, and i’m disappointed there hasn’t been more follow through on that both here and on Bristol’s show.
FanGirl: Yes, I am a fan of these as well, except when it’s just commentary on the transcript of a video. It is neither hard hitting nor entertaining and I stand by what I said.
Enjoy your week.
#freedownvote
Leave Mr. Bitch Tits alone!
“don’t listen to people on the streets.” this is a straight shot of good advice for all, and representative of Josh’s wasted breath, spent on helium-filled words in an enclosed space, where dewy farts flavor each exhalation.
A guy who has to take drug tests and report to a probation officer is making a living by posting videos of holding other people accountable?
This deadbeat loser might as well write a book on parenting.
What a fucking loser.
Best nickname ever: Josh “BITCH TITS” Abrahms”
Lmao hahaha haha haha
Tb writes: “Greetings turtle riders. Bret and I will be going live tonight at 9:00 for our regularly scheduled, award winning program.”
What, Bret will be joining you? Oh my word…You just administered the ‘Kill shot’ to your show, silly pants!
You need a reading comprehension course.
Then you can take a Logic course.
If I took your pants, shit in them, and then put them on your head, wouldn’t that be sillier? Shitty head,
I’m hearing through the grapevine that there may be a warrant issued tomorrow, due to live streaming his probation officer. Charges to follow. Things that make you go hmmmm.
Hey Mama Hey Mama Hey Mama Hey. Bwaaaabababababa. Bwaaaaabababababa. Shake it left, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam, Shake it right, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam. Ewwwwwwww. Badadadadadada. Boom.
You need help immediately
I see what you did there. Join him then Spitroast!!!!!! I like your swag.
If he was black or rican his PO would tell him where to find the snitches. No defending a Lasopa dope. But hey why are we so fucked?
I’m shocked that Josh can even stand up the fat heffer. fatass ripping a butt. When’s his mama’s next gangfuck supposed to be? Asking 4 a friend.
Whatever happened to the tow truck hooker? Wasn’t she arrested for felony fraud, or for something like that? Did I miss an episode? Folks like her usually can’t stay quiet for more than about 30 minutes…
Dress Josh up as female deer with horns.
Drop him off in Long Island woods during hunting season.
2019 Year of Pig, Lee. Josh Abrams a pig. That why I stop you today.
Ho Li Phuk, I think girlfriend is the PIG.
I hear an Oink coming from a tow truck.
Someone should fuck joshes mother for him. He could make a video of that. Hello bottom his old friend.
Im sick of hearing about this beefy faggot. I would fully support the police greasing him
“Beefy”? Fucks wrong with you fruitbasket?
I used to fuck guys like you, Josh, when I was in prison to show dominance.
His ship is sinking slowly for all of us to watch
Once you get tired of these Josh stories I think it would be great if you looked into the construction of Worcesters Polar Park and which State and Local politicians are getting rich on that deal.
Just like you used to do.
He doesnt fail a piss test because he is on suboxone/subutext/methadone which means he can do opiates without failing a piss test. Meth faggots get on ritalin to cover their meth use. The POs know this and there is nothing they can do, short of catching them red-handed.
That’s not entirely true. Depends on the test. Most, if not all, drug tests can differentiate between which drugs have been taken. Different markers for different drugs. Pretty basic for today’s tests.
Maybe thats how it was back in the day but not anymore
Josh remind me of my Chinese friend.
Ug Lee
Man who run in front of car tired
Man who run behind car exhausted
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Cheap prostitute offer more bang for your buck.
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
I love what you guys do, please keep exposing him.
Here I was, bored, watching the rain fall, and waiting for the Pat’s game to start. And then, this lovely nugget gets posted.
Awesome!
Josh tested positive for sperm in his ass, mouth and on top of his head
Stop lying.
You know I have loads blasted on my tits snd face.
I love a good pearl necklace.
Josh Abrams has you losers captivated. Not vice versa. I guess if it’s between Abrams vids and smelling mom’s ratpoon its not an easy choice. Josh’s ass could be a new hat for her. Hmm.
Captivated, I suppose. This little asshole has it coming to him, and I know I can’t wait to see it.
And if he it does it to himself, and I get a front row view, even better.
Something tells me we’re about to get a 5 to 10 year break from these two losers.
I hope you’re right. The only thing that will make that prospect even sweeter is a live stream of him going away.
And the sad thing is that someone who actually SHOOTS someone else gets less time.
Josh may be annoying, but he hasn’t put anyone in the hospital. Hasn’t bitten any cops…
And all we know is it was a female voice — who says it was his PO?
JA tried to hurt one of his former coworkers something fierce, some type of set up. TBS does have the details on this site somewhere, as slapnutz got caught in the act, and fortunately his former coworker got away.
He was arrested last night for assault. JA is not as harmless as you make him out to be.
Josh is transitioning into the ugliest bitch of all time but it is fortunate that when he gets pregnant he has plenty of tit for baby to suckle on.
He’s only self recording in some garage cuz he smoked mad meth; he didn’t want the smell to permeate into the area he was squatting around.
Hit the glass dick and light up a cig and film yourself for 50 minutes. Yah that to me sounds like a narcissistic meth head, faggot that pimps out of his leather faced wop hooker gf that brags about banging tow truck drivers.
The judge is working with international partners to have josh removed from the country (shipping container style) to China for organ harvest.
josh spent 40 minutes of his life making this video to prove himself to strangers on the internet. what a sad life.
i’m also amazed that he hasn’t come out of the closet yet to use his gayness as a prop.
It’s always a hoot when a chud that lives in mommys shitty basement says they have “records”. Bitch you don’t need records fat body, you need to clean the cobwebs that flew from your moms creeky old peachpitt into your porky face. Eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww.