Hoodrat Heroes

Brockton’s Biggest Bitch Vanilla Lice Arrested For Assaulting His Own Mother and Mother’s Boyfriend While Wearing FUBU Sneakers

Anyone remember Thomas Scopa, Brockton’s biggest bitch and buttnut loser? He’s the chudnugget who once stole his girlfriend’s cancer GoFundMe. money

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And also challenged me, a female in her thirties, to a Dunkin Donuts parking lot to duke it out….

 

…And then promptly ran on Dunkins, right the fuck out of there and away from me.

Brockton’s biggest bitchtits.

 

Just when you think he couldn’t possibly be any more of a bleeding, slimy vagina, he pulls a Billy Mays

 

And gets arrested for drunkenly kicking the shit out of his own mother and her boyfriend. And the report is GLORIOUS. Let’s do the highlights:

 

1. Scopa was tanked at his mom’s house when the cops showed up

Getting shitfaced and beating the fuck out of your own mother in her own home. Oh, the city of champions.

 

2. Scopa was arrested wearing FUBU Sneakers

Because, of course he was. What else would he be wearing?

Of course we’re judging you, Scopa. We’ve always been judging you. I just love that the police included his 1995 gangsta footwear in their report. I feel like they wrote it for me. Thank you.

 

3. Scopa Attempted to Lie His Way Out Of Arrest/Jailtime And The Cops Knew It

 

Say it with me, once more, for the people in the back: “BITCHTITS.” If you drunkenly beat up your own mother and her vulvawarmer dejour in her own home, and then try to lie you’re way out of the consequences, you are the definition of a bitch. Look it up.

 

4. Scopa Beat The Shit Out Of His Mom And Her Boyfriend, Because Her Boyfriend Tried To Get Him Off Her Living Room Floor

I imagine he was yelling “You’re not my real dad!” The whole time, and his mom had to get him a juicebox and Fruit Rollup to calm down.

 

Well, there you have it, folks, another day in the pathetic, miserable, useless existence that is Thomas “Vanilla Lice” Scopa. What a lovable little loser scamp he is! As an added bonus, please allow me to share one of my most favorite moments from the “Scopa” game I was playing with my crew a few months back – when we trolled him in to calling the Dr. Sciencey show, and things got really weird, and really gay, fast.

 

Classic Scopa.

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21 Comment(s)
  • MarcEcho
    June 19, 2019 at 1:30 am

    What about the man who tried driving his baby niece off the road? nobody wanna talk about that?

  • Jaramillo'sDaddyDEE
    June 19, 2019 at 1:27 am

    okay but how dose this help the community? still got crackheads and heroin addicts nodding off and dying infront of the brockton mini mart. the man’s an alcoholic that’s his own problem.

  • Imetmyhusbandatthebrocktonfair
    June 17, 2019 at 2:49 am

    It’s not the the sneakers it what you do with them. Kicking your mother’s shitbag boyfriend in the head for trying to tell you shit in your own house is absolutley correct. Plus this kid is funny as hell. So what he hustled fools on go fund me. That’s their own stupidity, it’s like getting catfished at this point. You were warned. I’m from Brockton and I approve this message. Paid for for by the commitee to buy Carpenter’s son crack rocks.

  • Two Patch Crappy Jack
    June 16, 2019 at 6:08 pm

    FUBU? Puff Daddy would be so proud of him…

  • Bantam Draper
    June 16, 2019 at 9:27 am

    Getting stomped out by a FUBU has to be one of the worst feelings in the world

  • Ratchetsaurous Rex
    June 15, 2019 at 8:32 am

    Thanks to TB and friends, anytime I have seen this doucheberry amongst my travels here in Brockvegas…. I point and laugh. Every. Single. Time.

    And I mean, really Scopa, how cool do you really think you are tryna fight a girl by having her meet you at an establishment well known here as “Junkie Dunkies”?

    I do hope the mother and boyfriend are safe now.

    • Swing and a miss
      June 17, 2019 at 2:59 am

      Calling it brockvegas is wack. Your corny. You should move. Some small town full of boring people would be better for you. You sound old and dusty. I bet you got a dirty scrunchie in your hair and pajama pants 24/7.

  • Captain Trips
    June 14, 2019 at 8:57 pm

    I have the solution all figured out:

    First I’ll soften him up a bit, strip him naked, reverse hogtie him, draw a set of lips surrounding his asshole in red lipstick, write ‘celebrating gay pride month’ on his forehead, and leave him in Mattapan square at 12:30 AM on a Saturday

  • True justice
    June 14, 2019 at 7:47 pm

    He’s a good boy, a very good boy

  • Mr. Scopas’ Poop Chute
    June 14, 2019 at 4:20 pm

    I hate when he gets these calls because then he gets these ideas and I’m the one that pays in the end. If only he can just beat up his mother more…. infant where’s Michael Lindburg a.k.a. MAC at when you need em?!

  • able
    June 14, 2019 at 4:08 pm

    Can we get the stepdad on or something? He seems like the wildcard here.

  • What Now?
    June 14, 2019 at 3:57 pm

    I came here to see FUBU sneakers. Where the FUBUs at?

  • Lmfao....
    June 14, 2019 at 3:45 pm

    This kid IS a definite douche but that call was fucking funny as fuck!! He handled it like a pro.

  • hank
    June 14, 2019 at 3:43 pm

    He’s so sad his sneakers were a donation from a poor child in Africa.

  • MILFmanJack
    June 14, 2019 at 3:29 pm

    Bitchboy Thomas really isn’t a bad kid. I just think he got mixed up with the wrong crowd is all.

    • Bristol Turtlechick
      June 14, 2019 at 3:36 pm

      Listen, I appreciate him. He’s hilarious. It’s just that…he is the joke. But a great joke. Ya feel?

  • Liawatha
    June 14, 2019 at 3:04 pm

    Although I can’t condone Thomas’s behavior, those FUBU tennis shoes are pretty snazzy.

    • Bristol Turtlechick
      June 14, 2019 at 3:22 pm

      I want you to know how much I love your comments.
      It’s a lot. That’s how much.

      • Liawatha
        June 14, 2019 at 7:21 pm

        Oh my, Bristol, you have me blushing. What would Bruce think? I will just have to admire you from afar and imagine what might have been.

  • Mike D
    June 14, 2019 at 2:52 pm

    I did it like this
    I did it like that
    I did it with a whiffleball bat.

  • Said Nobody
    June 14, 2019 at 2:43 pm

    He’s a quality human being.
    I bet he does so much for his community

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