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Source: A Trumbull woman is facing a felony charge for a series of actions against an ex-boyfriend from Tolland and the accusations include vandalism and strategically placing seafood in his home and car to create smelly situations, an arrest warrant indicates. The case dates back to Sept. 30, when a 38-year-old Tolland man went to the state police Troop C barracks to complain about what a warrant describes as harassment by his ex-girlfriend, 29-year-old Rachael Marinaccio, of Trumbull.

The man said their relationship had been deteriorating and they went on a cruise together regardless and things did not go well, according to a warrant. She allegedly told him she once put sardines in an ex-boyfriend’s car air conditioning vent for revenge, a warrant states. Two days before the complaint was filed, she had spent the night and the man woke up to a 5-five page breakup letter that made him nervous, according to a warrant.

On Oct, 2, he found a lobster tail glued to the wall behind the refrigerator, according to a warrant. Troopers then inspected the man’s property and found more lobster tails under the rug in the rear seat of his truck, according to a warrant. Damage to the man’s vehicles included key marks, a warrant indicates. The man secured a restraining order on Oct. 8, court records indicate. A warrant says the man met Marinaccio via the online dating app Bumble, which has the slogan, “Life’s Short. Make the first move,” on its homepage.

She was arrested on a warrant Feb. 15, appeared in court once and is due back on March 13, court records show.

This same exact shit happened to me sophomore year at UMass. Somehow they had lobster night at the dining commons. I thought nothing of it. Then couple days later me and my roommate started to blame each other for the room smelling like shit. This was a rather common occurrence though. I argued it was his disgusting unkempt grundle that was the culprit. He said it was my unwashed sorostitute sheets.

Then after a while it became unbearable. It was unlivable. So we tore the room apart, and hidden deep underneath the bunk beds were three rotting lobster corpses. As soon as we found them the kids who lived across the hall immediately came into our room bursting out laughing. It was one of the greatest pranks I’ve ever been a part of because they’d watched us blame each other all week and somehow kept their dirty little secret buried deep inside their soulless bodies. We had no choice but to respect the hustle.

My point here is simple – this is one twisted bitch. And this poor guy probably could’ve figured that out by looking at her Facebook profile picture collections:

When your entire collection of profile pictures are all selfies from that close range, you know you’re dealing with a crazy bitch. That’s just science.

Remember, this guy went to the cops on September 30 to file a complaint after she left what I would imagine to be an insane five page breakup letter where seafood was a recurring theme. Here’s the profile picture she posted on September 30:

Notice she specifically cropped out half of the guy’s face. That’s her sending a message loud and clear – crazy shit’s about to go down.

And just to throw off the cops, look where she checked into on September 30:

Havana. Now I know Cuba’s a communist, backwards country. But I to me that picture doesn’t look current. Maybe it is still 1959 in Havana, I dunno. But the timing is odd, especially since she was back at her place barbecuing the next day:

He found the lobster tails the following day, October 2. And I know from experience that it takes about a week before the smell becomes unbearable. Clearly this chick planned it all out, left her crazy breakup note, and walked away with a smile on her face knowing she had planted the crustacean bombs in so many different places.

Meanwhile Carrie Underthesea has a warrant out for her arrest and she’s flying around the country and running half marathons and shit:

So the lesson here is simple – don’t date any woman you meet online who only posts up close selfies on Facebook. Because chances are she’s skilled the art of the seafood breakup and things will not end well for you.