Jack Kanoff On Bad Commeters

Commenter Of The Week: Queef Pancake Not Happy About Our “Grammer,” Wrong Pronouns, And Misunderstanding Of Diseases

Commenter Of The Week: Queef Pancake Not Happy About Our “Grammer,” Wrong Pronouns, And Misunderstanding Of Diseases

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The Turtleboy Sports Facebook page, the Lost Boys of Turtle, AND the Turtleboy Sports Fallout Shelter have been unpublished. While we fight to get them back please make sure to like and follow the Turtleboy Refugees Page page by clicking on the image above, as well as our other backup pages the Turtleboy Sports Safe Space, and Turtleboy Smiles And Sunshine.

 

 

 

 

 

The best part about the Turtleboy Refugees Facebook page is that it allows reviews. Here’s this week’s butthurt commenter of the week……

Wait…..what?

Yup, Amanda Crofutt is pretty much anyone who has ever disliked Turtleboy, ever.

She’s right though.

  • Here at Turtleboy we believe that things like cancer and the flu are a disease. Turns out diseases are when grown adults make the conscious choice to stick a needle in their arm in order to get high.
  • We’re awful with pronouns. Huge microaggression. When we see a woman who looks like a woman, talks like a woman, and has woman body parts, we have a tendency to assume they are a woman. Very hateful.
  • Our “grammer” is messed up! And if you think that’s bad, weight intil you see are sbellin!!
  • We need to leave people who are “down on their luck alone.” So all those wonderful people scamming the system, lying about their circumstances, and breaking the law should be given a free pass because it hurts this random white woman’s feelz.
  • The people we “target” receive “death threats.” Not Turtleboy though. We never receive death threats.

Screen Shot 2017-02-12 at 12.15.47 AM

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Screen Shot 2017-03-29 at 12.04.24 PMScreen Shot 2017-03-29 at 12.04.33 PM

Ever.

Hey Amanda, here’s “am” idea – if you don’t like our blog, maybe just stop reading it? I know, I know, it’s a crazy concept that millenials don’t understand. But back in the day people used to have what were called, “differing opinions.” One person viewed the world one way, and another person viewed the world another way. They both agreed that the other should be able to speak their mind, and that neither was required to change their mind as a result of that. I know, it’s fucked up. What did people do about speech that was arbitrarily deemed “hate speech?” 

Sorry Amanda, but we’ve considered your review and decided not to write the blog on our spelling errors. Better luck next time.

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21 Comment(s)
  • BlackandWhite
    December 30, 2017 at 10:22 am

    grammer

    LMAO!! That’s perfect.

  • Jojo
    December 30, 2017 at 2:21 am

    She’s the least of your problems, you gotta watch out for the neck bearded, been to jail, rackin up the street cred by breaking into cars, getting free turtle boy advertising, hard core, gangsta rapper. And lets not forget the guy who’s literal name is Mass Deztruction who is the CEO/Manager/Owner & lead artist at HEAVY Hittaz Productions! This guy is basically the white Dr. Dre and Death Row Records of the Northeast. He uses Z instead of S and says gangsta shit like he’ll have you merked, which I’m guessing is gangsta white boy speak. Anyway, if you do get merked by the heavy hitta, at least you’ll get to see what your insides look like.

    I hope he doesn’t take that trip since you don’t watch your lip.

  • TJB
    December 29, 2017 at 5:25 pm

    Try a salad once and awhile you fat pig.

    • Flatulence
      December 29, 2017 at 7:19 pm

      Wednesday Addams ate 100,000 too many Twinkies

      • well..
        December 29, 2017 at 8:30 pm

        she looks more like Pugsley!

        • none
          December 30, 2017 at 12:22 am

          Come on Turtles, if that is not Uncle Fester, I do not know who is.
          stan peese you are a sick boy dude. guess a hero maybe to some, but god damn

  • 3rdgradelesson
    December 29, 2017 at 4:32 pm

    This dumb bitch never heard of “i before e except after c. Wonder if she “recieved” her grade school diploma.

    • 4th grade lesson
      December 30, 2017 at 2:28 am

      i before e except after c
      or when sounded as ‘a’ as in neighbor and weigh.
      also except when the vowels are sounded as ‘e’ as in ‘seize’
      Or ‘i’ as in ‘height’
      Or in exceptions such as ‘science’, ‘forfeit’, and ‘weird’.

  • Pound town
    December 29, 2017 at 3:44 pm

    The scary thing is some dude is probably hitting that.

  • Puddintaine
    December 29, 2017 at 3:38 pm

    Why is the only comments that are ever interesting on TB are the ones that get the most thumbs down? I gotta scroll through a bunch of sycophants in there echo chamber just to see something interesting. An also, fuck didi whoever she is. Seriously no one wants to read anymore about that fat cunt. Nobody cares!!

    • moan and groan
      December 29, 2017 at 7:02 pm

      you,,,,,,,,, really don’t have to scroll through anything at all.

      you just like to moan. *hugs for your hurts*

    • Puddintaine
      December 29, 2017 at 8:00 pm

      Lol “there” was on purpose. Had a bet with a friend about how long it’s taken some grammar Nazi to show. So predictable. Irony is the title of the article. Lol played like Sega.

      • "there"?
        December 29, 2017 at 8:35 pm

        i don’t even know what you’re referring to, child

        are you the kid who always posts as Bogglesnort to make fun of tbs but constantly reads and comments it? are you twelve and had an older sis featured here or something?

  • Local real local
    December 29, 2017 at 1:32 pm

    Dear Amanda,

    I’m hiring a different lawyer other than R N Vulva Esq. She is a sensitive lawyer and will get to the bottom of your case.

    Please contact Teets Inaface Esq. She is a big lawyer out of Canada, but comes to the states on SJ issues, aclu and civil rights claims.

    I think you have a good claim against the entire operation. All the best.

  • Edjamacated
    December 29, 2017 at 12:00 pm

    Oh PLEASE let her “contiously” post!!! Obviously irony is not lost on her. SUCH a douche!!

  • stan peese
    December 29, 2017 at 11:34 am

    Amanda is actually a freakazoid in the sack. Riding the trolley is cool, but do not, i repeat, do not go Reverse Cowgirl with Amanda Crofutt!! Your thighs will come out of it bruised and you’ll have leg cramps for weekz! I had to drink fucking gallons of water to fix the issues from that train ride. Making out is ok, if you don’t mind feeling the 3 day manly beard stubble. Cleaning the carpet is fine, really really tangy, but I don’/t think it’s a dirty don’t wash tangy, I think it’s more of a walking around with a pickle tucked tangy. It does go away boyz. Lastly, agree upon a pet name, like peaches or moby. During orgasmic pinnacle I was screaming at the top of my lungs Crofutt, Crofutt, Crofutt, but sounded like Crowfuck, Crowfuck, Crowfuck. It was weird to say the least, and it got worse when she just laid there and gurggled. Not gigled, gurggled. Fark Riston, tell that wannabee pimp to go back to chasing grade school gyrls. peese out playa

  • Im offended WAAAAAAAHHH
    December 29, 2017 at 11:22 am

    Hahahaha….sbellin errors….. Seriously though these millenials are truly a bunch of pussified bitches …you get a trophy you get a trophy oh you didnt play but still want a trophy ok you get a trophy too … The real world is going to eat these butt hurt pussy ass bitches alive

  • AgingCynic
    December 29, 2017 at 11:11 am

    Not to get too granular here but “bad commeters (sic)”? Ironic, no?

  • CUNTWAGON
    December 29, 2017 at 10:46 am

    She’s just pissed her head is shaped like an egg,has a receding hairline, pig like nose, and 2 marbles smashed in her doughy face for eyes.

  • Screw PC
    December 29, 2017 at 10:18 am

    Riston Borges did not feel like being a “pussy ass bitch made whiteboy (sic)” himself when he threw that insult, since he didn’t happen to be going to court or filling out a job application at the time.

    Nah. He decided to go full non-white gangsta on that one, because as everyone knows, when Latinos are hoodrats, they can become Caucasian at will.

    He’s also obviously no stranger to the fact that chinstrap goatee facial hair is good for covering up the stretch marks he got from getting thousands of man-chowder tonsil baths on the floor of Greyhound bus station bathrooms.

    I’ll translate that in case he’s at the predictable third grade reading level and sees this:

    “Riston, you suck cock, and so does your dad right now, if he isn’t already dead after getting caught sucking cock.”

  • #dicksR4chicks!
    December 29, 2017 at 10:09 am

    Damn that’s a manly beast, I best she’s a he, Amanda is really Adam and its momma got the “disease”. I bet she’s a college student majoring in Women’s Studies and wears a pink pussy hat cuz she thinks(never happened but did in her fat head) that she was sexually assaulted by a passerby on the train or some shit when they brushed by her, like so many of these feminist terrorists claim. There’s no rape culture, no one cares about your period, and most of us could give two craps about your pronouns. It’s like a bunch of 18-25 year old retards running around changing their sexual orientation because it’s trendy. Keep that shit behind closed bedroom doors where it belongs and quit shoving it in our faces, we don’t care that you eat snatch lesbo.

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