Cop Block Famous Ratchet Lawyer Hits 2 People With Her Car After Keying Their Car Because They Wanted To Park In Spot She Was Standing In At The 99 Restaurant

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Earlier today, the Chicopee Police Department posted this story about a parking spot debacle at the 99 Restaurant on Memorial Drive.

If you’re from Western Mass, I already know what you’re thinking. Sounds like a Tuesday in Chicopee. Big whoop. Normally, I’d agree with you, but then an investigative turtle rider sent us a message and it blew my fatherfucking mind. The best thing about his message was, based on the comments from the Chicopee PD page (and her mugshot), no one would have known the wiser. Thank you anonymous, rider. I commend you.

Anywho, Rachel Rothman. Rothman decides she’ll save a parking spot on foot and parks herself. Car pulls up, Rothman doesn’t want to move, argument ensues, Rothman keys car, people in car approach her and Rothman flees… but not before hitting the people confronting her with her car.

Before I go on, let’s be honest. I’ve done this a time or two. Saw a great spot, jumped out to save it for a friend that was on their way and guess what? It always ends the same way. I see an actual vehicle and hope they pass by…. But if they don’t, guess who’s moving? You’re damn skippy I am. Because parking spots are made for cars to park, not for people to park. It’s pretty fucking basic. I’m not the only one who feels this way.

I think we all know parking spots are for cars, not furry-clothed fupasloths.

Where it gets really good is when someone tells you that this Rachel Rothman is the same Rachel Rothman that posted this video a few years ago.

Remember this? I don’t. But it went viral, prompted an investigation into police brutality and ended with the guy on the ground walking away with a mediocre settlement. No real details on why or how, just a bunch of people screaming “You’re racist,” and “He dindu nuffin!” Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. But I want to point out, it happened in Northampton where people are scared to have Coffee with a Cop, and where High 5 Friday was cancelled in elementary schools because the site of uniformed officers giving children high fives might offend illegal immigrants and black people as a whole. The same town Rachel made this video and then it ended up on Copblock.com. And, yes that website is exactly what it sounds like.

He didn’t get shot, he got peppered sprayed and cuffed outside of a bar. Who hasn’t? But that’s not why we’re here.

We’re here because people like this – the Rachel Rothman’s of the world – need to be dick slapped. Know how I know? Because if she hadn’t done anything, she would have stuck around to show those cops she knew her rights. She LOVES to state laws in legalese. But instead, she drove home, probably beat the piss out of her car and waited for the scary cops to show up – because she knows what a BOLO is and she knows how to react to one. She knew they took her license plate, she knew they would report her… so she had to get home as soon as possible so she had enough time to key her own car and plan her “I’m an attorney, I couldn’t possibly do that” story.

Her sole purpose is to push an agenda using her law degree as a crutch to show you her words and actions are more important and hold more weight than yours. She can’t possibly be wrong because she’s been educated and knows every single law and loophole. Her slogan is “I’m a lawyer, I know things you don’t.” I’m not buying her side of the story in the least. Even if I did, I don’t blame either of the people in the other car for confronting her. If someone keyed my car, they’d get more than a confrontation, and I drive a steaming piece of shit.

She’s not completely thoughtless because she already deleted her LinkedIn and Facebook pages (she must know she was at risk of being turtle famous). We can’t find a website for her or anything like that, but sh does have an Avvo page with one rating, and an address and phone number.

Don’t do it guys!! Seriously this time!! This is obviously a reputable lawyer!!!

She also knows that one day someone will catch on to her and years of law school will have been one big fucking loan payment with no real end game or government bail out. Good. I hate people like her. She’s the thunderpoon that can memorize the dictionary but doesn’t comprehend the definitions. Fuck her. The only thing she’s good at is helping shitbag tenants from being evicted.

If you hire her to legally represent you, she will put you on retainer and probably suck you dry. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.