Get a load of this Herpesauraus out of Chicopee:
That’s obviously a mistake. They meant to put the 4 before the 2. Because there’s no way in hell someone who has been alive for a mere 24 years could possibly look this grizzled.
But then I realized it’s Chicopee. And she actually looks 19 in Chicopee years.
That bitch right there done seen some shit. You don’t look that cocky, wearing a chain like that over your tittoos, with big ass hoop earrings, if you didn’t just smuggle a pack Newports inside your fupa rolls into county jail.
Mind you, it was Easter morning at 4 AM. Lots of normal people were trying to get some sleep so they could go to church in the morning because they think it makes up for skipping the rest of the year. The cops were called to this hoodbooger hole in the wall 6 times in the previous 48 hours! And somehow she was not arrested any of those times!!
But this cocky cockswab ran out of fucks to give a long time ago, so not only did she keep having loud parties, she got a freaking DJ. No. Fucks. Given.
Here’s what her neighbors have to deal with when they walk up to the FRONT DOOR of their apartments:
There are squirrels that live in that trash pile. They make sweet passionate love and feast on bounties of backwash Heineken, blunt roaches, and used condoms.
LOL. Just kidding. I think we can all agree that no one who has ever stepped foot in that apartment has ever considered using a condom.
Here’s audio of the Herpesauraus and hoodrat patrol attempting to negotiate terms of surrender with the police.
And here’s another normal occurrence living in the same apartment as the Chicopee Herpesauraus – hearing rival hoes show up to challenge her to step outside to fight after finding out that the Herpesauraus has been treating their man’z mutton dagger like a beat up 80’s atari.
People we spoke with who live near her describe it as hell. She broke the front door that everyone uses so now anyone can walk into the building. The landlord can’t keep up with maintaining the place because it’s impossible to get rid of people like this, and she just ends up breaking and destroying more stuff. There are constant cars up and down the street for semi-nightly parties, and fights usually break out in the streets afterwards, waking everyone up. I think we can go out on a limb and assume that this snatchbeast doesn’t have to worry about going to work in the morning which is why she gets to live life like section 8 Paris Hilton.
Oh, and she’s a mother too (ca-ching), but luckily the poor crotch fruits don’t seem to live there. Don’t worry thought, I’m sure she still claims them as dependents when the welfare fairy comes knocking. She ditched the kids to live her best life, which of course looks like this:
That right there is a metaphor for Chicopee.
Not sure if the Herpesauraus has Facebook, but if she does and you know what it is please feel free to send it over to TBNews.
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