All-Star Criminals

Danielson Queef Stroganoff Judge Judy Star Arrested Shoplifting For Billionth Time This Year, Tries To Get Away On Motorized Fupamobile

Danielson Queef Stroganoff Judge Judy Star Arrested Shoplifting For Billionth Time This Year, Tries To Get Away On Motorized Fupamobile

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You simply must see this Danielson grundle nugget:

The shirt. The face. The no fucks given attitude just oozing from her pores. The Connecticut corridor strikes again!! This was the best part:

The female fled from store employees of Putnam Stop & Shop in a motorized wheelchair before speeding off in a red Kia Sportage. 

Not only was she stealing hundreds of dollars worth of shit, she’s also one of those slopbuckets who rides around on a motorized scooter even though she’s fully capable of walking. Then of course she drove away in a Kia. She probably had a better chance of escape if she just stayed in the fupamobile.

Turns out this queef stroganoffroff is the most notorious bandit in the Connecticut Corridor, and that’s no easy feat. She frequently tries, and almost always fails at stealing thousands of dollars worth of merchandise by simply walking out of the store with multiple carts full of shit she didn’t pay for:

Fifty fucking six. That is what fifty six years of life in Danielson will do to the human body. Anthropologists get a boner just thinking about what can be learned about human evolution from this ratchtacular corner of the planet. God save the queen.

She reached the point where people began to recognize her and call the cops as a result of being WINY Radio famous

She was literally arrested two months ago:

Then there’s all the times she didn’t get caught:

You may also recognize her from Judge Judy:

Naturally she made her grand debut after being sued by her daughter after she tried to scam her by putting the electric bill in her name and then not paying it. Oh yea, and her husband, who of course just got out of jail, countersued the daughter because she was collecting his SSI when he was in the can:

Someone really, really, really needs to get us a copy of that tape. Please!!

The best part is she can afford the $5,000 bail, but she can’t afford to pay for her shit. What can you do? Some people don’t have the “disease.” They’re just old school and like to steal shit for the thrill of it. And why wouldn’t she? She’s been arrested five billion times just this year and hasn’t spent a night in jail. Because Connecticut is just as bad, if not worse than Massachusetts when it comes to judges just not giving a fuck whatsoever. Ya know, because she’s “going through a hard time” and she can “turn her life around” at the ripe old age of 56, which of course is 98 in Danielson years.

Anyway, safe to say she’ll be out again and getting arrested at a Lowe’s near you before the ball drops on New Years. Just watch out for her motorized scooter. That shit is souped up with a brand new engine and it don’t stop for nobody!! Beep, beep!!

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9 Comment(s)
  • don
    December 24, 2017 at 4:09 pm

    why would the courts let her out on only $5000 bond? she is a habitual offender and should remain in jail.

  • Turd Reversalist
    December 23, 2017 at 4:04 am

    Yet another that I shall pass up.
    With those planet-sized butt cheeks, I’d be afraid of their combined gravitational force pulling me in the black netherhole between them, never to wield the Rod of Justice again.
    Plus she has a face that looks like she was spawned by Grumpy Cat after it got screwed by that Muppet character, Beaker.
    Stunt Penis, this one is all for you and any other brave souls willing to go spelunking in that cheese hole.

  • Wally Greens
    December 23, 2017 at 12:50 am

    That’s what people want — Merchandise. Cleaning products from WalMart, Batteries & steaks from Sav-a-Lot, nighties from Victoria’s Secret. All them clothes from Tar-jghe. Quality stuff – Tractor batteries from CountryMax, Diapers & Baby formula from CVS & Walgreens. People WANT that “Merchandise”. Them stores have more than enough, they won’t miss one…. They Owe me. I deserve it. I’m entitled to it. They have, I need, I want. I take. All your Merchandise is Mine. I want a bigger TV, you got all kinds of TVs,,, I’ll serve myself thank you no thank you.

  • Steve
    December 22, 2017 at 11:21 pm

    Stunt penis would you. ?

  • IAMTHEWALRUS
    December 22, 2017 at 10:01 pm

    LMAO! This beast made such an impression on me when I saw her on Judge Judy that I took her picture from the show. They recently repeated this episode.

  • December 22, 2017 at 10:00 pm

    Oh deer…what a way to begin the new year, in court.

  • Loss prevention
    December 22, 2017 at 5:55 pm

    She doesn’t usually get caught because people look the other way when they see her. You know who would never get away with shoplifting? Destinee Morris

    • Mmmmmm destiny
      December 22, 2017 at 9:05 pm

      Because people would much rather pat destiny down for the goods than this fupasaurus

  • rosie O'
    December 22, 2017 at 5:50 pm

    Yep… that covers it … yep

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