Dear Jason Marchand, Please Pay Your Bill At Compass Tavern So These Nice Girls You Conned Don’t Get Stiffed
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We published this blog at 9:30 on Wednesday, asking the public to help identify these two dooshnozzles who stiffed Compass Tavern out of a $143 bill.
Within 11 minutes we had a bunch of people all messaging the same name:
Jason Marchand. Check out his Facebook page before he inevitably shuts it down.
As low as this is, I think we can all agree that the real crimes committed here were, 1) grown men drinking $143 worth of Twisted Tea, 2) those God awful “I’m a California hipster who is so chill that I only shave my overgrown chinstrap once a fortnight” things they have on their faces, and 3) a grown man wearing a knit cap indoors. Skipping on the bill can be forgiven if they pay it back and apologize. The other three infractions are simply unforgivable.
As you can see from his profile, Jason is originally from Brimfield, and appears to be around 38-40 years old:
Which means chances are he graduated from Tantasqua somewhere around 1996. Evidently he moved to San Diego in 2014:
Because he has meatstick friends that he uses as “body bait” for chicks:
He moved to San Diego with a “different mentality” in 2014, adhering to the very strict code of “no drugs and no bottle rats.”
He likes to eat out a lot:
And he ironically was familiar with the job that these girls were doing, because he had a similar job himself while in San Diego:
So yea Jason, we highly recommend you get in touch with Compass Tavern. And maybe give us the name of your friend too. That’d be nice. Hate to see you take the fall by yourself.
What’s fucked up about this is that the whole thing sounds premeditated. They ran up an obscene bill for two guys out getting lunch. Then they invite two girls over to eat them, make it look like they’re all together, and then leave under the guise that the girls paid for the meal. That’s some devious shit right there.
And Compass Tavern, we highly recommend you stop wasting your hard earned money advertising in the waste of space known as Pulse Magazine, and advertise with Turtleboy instead. We understand that Paul Giorgio thinks he’s the boss of the Worcester Gay Mafia, and he shows up at your door when you open up and basically strong arms you into running a full page ad in his shitty free magazine that no one ever reads. But you’re probably paying an arm and a leg for that add, and no one is seeing it that isn’t already going to Compass Tavern. You advertise with us and we’ll send crowds your way. We promise your return on investment will be much, much higher. After all, it took us exactly 11 minutes to find this asshat who stiffed you on the check.
But please, tell me more about Turtleboy Sports doesn’t do anything good for the community.
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