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Have you been following the trial of Steven West? The man who is being charged with murder after crushing his victim to death due to his own fatness during sex:
Not just one refrigerator – one and a half refrigerators!! You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you’re facing a murder charge and you’re being referred to as a kitchen appliance.
- Steven West met his ex-wife Caitlin Haden on Myspace and they got married when they were 20.
- For some reason Caitlin Haden thought a 400 pound man who she met on MySpace was worth purchasing a bus ticket to Indiana so that she could meet him.
- He had no car and no home, so they stayed in an an Indiana motel.
- Somehow she convinced him to move to Spencer in 2012, because apparently that town doesn’t have enough problems. They got married and he knocked her up.
- When he moved to Spencer he decided to sleep in a tent rather than move in with her. Ya got that? He traveled halfway across the country to sleep in a tent in Spencer.
- Then for whatever reason Caitlin Haden thought it would be a good idea to get knocked up by this fat bastard, not once, but twice.
- Soon afterwards her twin sister Alyssa Haden moved into her apartment, right around the same time the fat lardo ditched the tent and moved in with his wife and children.
- Steven West was really into 50 Shades of Gray and wanted to tie his wife up and stuff. She wasn’t into it. Hey genius, you weigh 400 pounds. You don’t get to be picky about how you have sex. You are beyond lucky as it is that you found a human being willing to fornicate with you.
- His wife said that she was attracted to him, despite all the blubber and fatness because, “His personality outweighed that.” Fantastic choice of words.
- The fat bastard must’ve gotten the impression that every woman out there lusts for his rolls, so he started making the moves on Alyssa Haden, which some contend were welcomed, but others say were pushed away.
- Alyssa Haden ended up dying after having sex with this big piece of Spencer love muffin. His wife Caitlin was in the hospital, pregnant with their second child.
- Steven West is set to take the stand in his defense, claiming gang members from Indiana drove to Spencer to kill Alyssa Haden.
That right there is a Spencer love triangle to remember. I don’t wanna make light of this because someone died here. But seriously, this is most amazing tale of white trash debauchery I’ve ever seen. And like I said, I’m most amazed that a 400 pound man has this much sex. It’s really mind-boggling when you think about it. When I see this face I can just smell the Ho-Ho’s from here:
That man right there was destined to one day live in Spencer and crush his wife’s twin sister to death while reenacting 50 Shades of Gray.
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