All-Star Criminals

Gardner Goatee Gangsta Kidnaps, Assaults, Tries To Extort An Elderly Guy Who Parked In His Spot So He Could Pick Up Meds At Greenfield Store 

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Here’s a winner out Gardner, who just so happens to be a well known business owner as well….


Bad ass!!! Anyone can assault an able bodied man in his prime. But it takes a special kind of dooshnozzle to assault a 74 year old simply because he wanted to go home and didn’t feel like paying you $20 for the temporary inconvenience of parking in your spot for a couple minutes.

And this is Greenfield we’re talking about here. Not New York or Boston. Greenfield. You don’t have to drive around for an hour to find a spot. You’re in the middle of nowhere. Park across the street.

This is the scene of the crime:

As you can see, the Franklin County hipster market is directly next to the Mattress Outlet on Route 2A. I can understand if you own a store and you see someone in your spot that you get pissed off. You earned that spot by opening a business, no doubt about it.

But the second you see that the guy who took your spot is a 74 year old man who is APOLOGIZING to you because he took your spot while he was inside getting medicine that might prevent him from dying, and has offered you a few bucks for his unforgivable crime, you just gotta take the L and find a new spot. There’s plenty of spots on both sides of the street.

But nope, the Gardner Goatee Gangsta had to let the 74 year old guy know just how big his schmenzer is. And instead of just taking the apology the guy offers, or accepting the generous offer of $5 for the temporary inconvenience, he tries extorting this elderly man who was out and about to pick up his meds.

Think of all the time he wasted letting this poor old guy know that he was the Alpha male in this situation. All he had to do was just park across the street and walk over. A fifteen second delay. Instead he wasted all this time trying to extort some poor guy who parked in is precious spot in Greenfield.

The best part is that the Gardner Goatee Gangsta is the one who called the cops. He just assaulted a 74 year old guy who was being held against his will and wanted to go home, and he went and cried to the cops like he was the victim. Reminds me of a certain former City Councilor out of Worcester. The ability of some people to victimize themselves is truly remarkable.

But of course it backfired and now he’s on Turtleboy. Aside from diddling a kid, it doesn’t get much worse than getting arrested for hitting an elderly guy because he took your parking spot for five minutes.

Here’s another thing. The Gardner Goatee Gangsta lives in the furniture capital of New England. That’s literally the only reason to go to Gardner – to buy overpriced furniture and take your picture next to the world’s largest chair. But yet he opens his business 45 minutes away in Greenfield. In other words, he’s too chicken shit to compete with other businesses in his home town. His company doesn’t even appear to have a website or a Facebook page, but they do have assigned parking, so at least they’ve got that going for them. And they’ve been getting bombarded with one star Google reviews since this incident, but their reviews weren’t very good before that either:

I’d say that he should try to make amends for this by going on his business’s Facebook page and at least issuing a bullshit apology. Maybe bring the old guy in, give him some free shit, take a picture, and try to salvage what’s left of your reputation. But once again, that would require having a Facebook page or a website. And apparently the Gardner Goatee Gangsta is a VERY busy guy who doesn’t have the time to get with the 21st century.

The bottom line is that this guy is getting off easy. In my legal expert opinion he should be charged with kidnapping too. He went out of his way to make sure the guy could not leave. He moved his truck in closer to prevent any sort of escape. And then when the guy tried to move a sign in order to wedge his way out of there he got his ass kicked for it. Couldn’t think of a business that deserves to fail more than this guy’s bootleg crap happy mattress outlet. I’d rather sleep on a urine soaked junkbox baby making machine that I found by the railroad tracks between Canterbury Street and Main South.

13 Comment(s)
  • ms100
    March 2, 2018 at 12:00 pm

    Turtleboy is jumping the shark on this one. The hyperbole is over the top – “… he took your spot while he was inside getting medicine that might prevent him from dying,…” There is no evidence that the victim was in a frail state, if he was then he could have parked in a handicapped spot. By Turtleboy logic, this elderly victim could have parked on the opposite side as well. If you look at the satellite imagery of the location, there is a huge number of parking spaces in the back of the grocery store/food market building. We need to stop putting senior citizens on pedestals, they are no different than anyone else and there are plenty of assholes among them. This victim was probably being an asshole who wanted to park closer to the store so he wouldn’t have to walk so far. The store owner certainly shouldn’t have assaulted him but the victim had absolutely no excuse for parking in his space.

  • juror seven esq.
    February 27, 2018 at 12:39 pm

    Double checked this story after reading it earlier. Not questioning that Harry is an asshole, but from the police report the parking space was at the rear of the building. Didn’t involve any of the diagonal curb parking on route 2A.
    Unanswered is whether or not Harry had the right to install the sign that he had “dibs” on a parking spot to start with. Private lot or additional off street parking?
    Either way, Harry deserves this internet shaming.

  • z
    February 26, 2018 at 8:21 pm

    There’s a “Mattress Firm” on the other side of I-91 that has reviews going back 2 years most dated last year. Possibly a new business ( I know ,used to be Sleepeze? but maybe new to Greenfield) ?

    So maybe Harry is falling apart from the new competition. The bad reviews and behavior (discounting the post shove ones) seem to match the time frame of Mattress Firm.

  • Finn
    February 26, 2018 at 6:04 pm

    Yelp has some great (accurate) reviews regarding Harry’s behavior. This is a typical review on Yelp from a woman complains about service, the mattress, and it takes a turn for the worst.

    She (the consumer) writes (towards the bottom of her review) :

    “Today I got a phone call from one of the men who delivered the mattress telling me I was being sued by his coworker for sexual harassment on the day they checked to find out if the mattress wasn’t on the level. That was so ridiculous that I choked and said something like “what! you’ve got to be kidding me!” He said I told the other guy that I was going to get nude and that he was going to sue me for sexual harassment. He told me he was a witness, he was one of the delivery guys. He said that the owner of Gold Bond Mattresses had approved reimbursement of half the purchase price of the mattress and that they’d be here at 6pm tomorrow to pick it up. I told him I didn’t want the money and that they couldn’t take the mattress if I hadn’t accepted the offer. He said he was giving me a warning that I was going to be sued. There’s more to the story but I’m sick of it. All I can say is Buyer Beware.”

    Harry writes back :

    “Harry F.
    Comment from Harry F. of Mattress Outlet
    Business Owner 1/14/2018 Karen, be honest by showing proof of your story to be true. We did everything possible to please you, delivered the mattress you personally selected. We shoveled your walkway the full length. We carefully worked around your collection of empty beverages in your bedroom. We also went back a second time to your mobile home in an attempt to find any hint of a defect in the bedding which we personally and respectfully handled all your linens because you felt we needed to do that as part of the free service and we gladly did. It was when we said we found no issues is when you felt betrayed. I say BUSINESS BEWARE with your next purchase. Read less”.

  • Finn
    February 26, 2018 at 5:53 pm

    I really hope Turtle Riders put this POS out of business.

    I’ve personally had this happen in my family (except the victim was a bit older – 78). The scumbag that did it (in his 30’s) knocked him around gave him a couple of black eyes and various other bruises. He’s lucky I wasn’t in the state at the time. I’m lucky I wasn’t – I think I would have let my temper get the better of me (but at least I would have been on equal ground).

    Guys like Harry Foster are pussies who pick on the elderly, children and weaker women (I’m guessing there are a lot of women that would, could and HAVE DROPPED that clown on his ass) for no other reason than they’re just failures-at-life losers.

    Sink that battleship he calls “Mattress Outlet” and let him reap what he’s sown.

    • The Unraveling of a Snowflake in Real Time
      February 26, 2018 at 9:09 pm

      Evolving from a not clever, newbie drone to a poseur intellectual to a keyboard tough guy, now? This is really starting to get good. It’s a bit morbid, though – like watching NASCAR for the crashes.

      I enjoy observing the ever escalating ego propping and delusional fantasies to validate the self righteous and entitled, but ultimately shallow and weak minded. It’s like the hoodboogers being corralled by the MSP or how the Left and Democrats are self-destructing and eating their own right now. Some have an inkling what is happening, but they just can’t stop it – they have to protect their egos at all costs. The karma is epic, but I promise I’ll go easier after you finally crack. It’s not sporting to kick someone when they’re down – no matter how much they deserve it.

      Soon you’ll be like Old Balls, getting banned from sites but continuing to rant wherever you can get some attention that you’re superior to everyone else and that you’ll kick all of our asses if we step on your lawn, blah, blah, blah.

      But do keep them coming, junior. Your stuff, like O.B.’s, is like reading clinical observations in the DSM. It’s gold, Jerry, gold!

  • TortugaNino
    February 26, 2018 at 3:57 pm

    well, now I know where to park when I’m in greenfield.

  • z
    February 26, 2018 at 3:11 pm

    Why the fuck does everyone take selfies of just themselves?

    We should be glad though that he didn’t do the trout lip pucker. Also, men, selfies are never a good look. Are you trying to be hipster ironic? The only time I ever use the front camera is for video calling and even then as rarely as possible.

    For what it’s worth, have you ever driven through Greenfield on a Saturday. The traffic sucks. One reason being the nose in parking. You might pack more cars in, but you take up a lot more road in doing it.

    For an added bonus, drive by when the SJWs are having a demonstration downtown.

    • z
      February 26, 2018 at 3:25 pm

      I wonder what his official response in court will be?
      “He parked in my spot!!!”?

      That should go over well.

      A bunch of Yelp reviews Pre-Shove show he’s got some issues. It also looks like some of his employees are worse than him.

  • Brian Allbitch
    February 26, 2018 at 2:52 pm

    He bess noht cum ner me, or I’ll sukk his dikk

  • GraftonHillGirl
    February 26, 2018 at 2:17 pm

    I like that you used schmenzer, the only other person I’ve ever heard use that is Mike Felger.

  • edward young
    February 26, 2018 at 2:09 pm

    Hope this POS goes bankrupt.

  • Stan the man
    February 26, 2018 at 2:08 pm

    Close the business Harry.
    You just fucked yourself.
    And it’s gonna be impossible to un fuck yourself.

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