Bone Ride

I Would Rather Die Than Pay 10 Cents For A Paper Bag At Big Y So That SJWs Can Feel Good About Themselves



Allow me, if you will, to rant for a moment.

I’m a Market Basket diehard. I would have my children in Market Basket if they had doctors. They have the best selection, the best prices, and the friendliest employees. It’s like shopping at Aldi’s or Price Rite, except you can’t find a guy in aisle six who will sell you his food stamps for half price. The only places I’ll go grocery shopping if I have the time, are Market Basket and Walmart. But the problem is that I live in Holden, both of those places are in Leominster (2 towns away), and finding a spot in Market Basket’s parking lot is like finding your Dad in Fitchburg on Father’s Day.

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and go to your local town grocery store, which in our case is Big Y. Shaw’s, Price Chopper, Stop & Shop, Big Y – it’s all the same shit. They’re all overpriced and terrible. None of them deserve to exist, and it should be illegal for any town to allow any grocery store that isn’t Market Basket to set up shop there. But when you’re out and about, and Mrs. Turtleboy needs you to pick up a bunch of shit because she has both crotch fruits and you owe her a favor, and you gotta be quick because you got a lot of crap to do, sometimes you have to suck it up and go to Big Y.

Well, sometime last month Big Y decided that they’re no longer doing plastic bags. I vowed I’d never go there again, because plastic bags are the greatest thing ever invented. I was born and raised in Worcester. A plastic bag was your best friend and life partner. They were your gym bag, your lunchbox, and your bathroom trashbags all rolled into one. I guarantee that every single person from Worcester who is reading this blog right now has a STASH of plastic bags that are easily accessible in their house. It’s just science.

I went in there today with a somewhat small shopping list and wanted to get in and out. They now give you the option of paying for paper bags, or bringing your own bag. So this is how I roll now when I grocery shop at Big Y, which is never.

I would rather DIE than pay $0.10 for a paper bag. I would fill this thing up and unload them into my trunk one item at a time over giving them the satisfaction of paying this de facto tax.

More than anything this is about principle. The principle of standing up to idiot liberals who are naive enough to believe that if Big Y stops using plastic bags we’ll fix global warming. That’s all this is – a stupid SJW idea about saving the planet.

Newsflash – banning plastic bags isn’t going to do dick. The reason climate change is a thing is because of carbon emissions. The largest polluters in the world are China and India. Any plan to combat climate change that doesn’t involve invading both of those countries, seizing their factories, and imposing environmental regulations on them, isn’t a real plan. It’s just fell good bullshit designed to make soccer moms in Northboro feel like they’re making a difference.

Also, since when did using exclusively paper products become a good thing? I remember growing up as a kid that saving the rainforest was all the buzz. I was told we were cutting down too many trees, but now I guess we have too many trees because they won’t stop pushing paper on us. Have you tried one of these paper straws? You literally eat half of it by the time your drink is done. I hate the people that made this happen with a passion.

A lot of people will say, “Uncle Turtleboy, you can just bring your own bags.”

Yea, and we could’ve written Al-Qaeda an apology letter after 911 too. When I’m out and about, I don’t have time to go back to my house and grab my grocery bags. I live in the middle of nowhere, far from civilization. This now requires planning ahead, which I never had to do before. Plus, those bags get disgusting too, so that’s one more chore I have to do that I didn’t have to do before. And all so that some SJWs can get the feelz. I’ll change my lifestyle and/or pay an extra tax if it means we’re actually fixing the planet. But this ain’t it chief.

Anyway, the rumor is that they’re building a Big Y in Rutland. If that happens it will be the greatest day of my life. I don’t know why they don’t have one already. Turtle riders living in Hubbarston, Oakham, Rutland, Paxton, Princeton, New Braintree, and Barre (that fake grocery store in Barre doesn’t count) don’t have a grocery store in their town, so they all have to shlep to the Big Y or Price Chopper in Gardner. Build it and it will eventually force the Big Y in Holden to go out of business and the Market Basket empire will spread as it was destined to do from the beginning.



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57 Comment(s)
  • BeenJammim Franklin
    September 6, 2019 at 10:32 am

    They checked me out then said I needed another bag.
    11 cents I put it on PLASTIC….

  • Kim Wescott
    September 5, 2019 at 10:00 pm

    What I wouldn’t give for a Market Basket up here in Littleton NH !!! Our folks would KILL for a MB and you would never hurt for business.

    I come from MB community, but all we have up here is Shaw’s, is for 75+ miles !!!

    PLEASE! PLEASE PLEASE Bring MB up here! With or without bags! We don’t care!

  • Kim Wescott
    September 5, 2019 at 9:36 pm

    The ridiculous stores that are eliminating (what they call ‘one time use’) plastic bags and forcing you to purchase paper bags (decimating forests) don’t realize that those ‘one time use’ bags also then function as lunch bags, pet pooper scooper bags, wet stinky gym bags, sneakers bags, dirty laundry bags, bottle/can 5 cent recycle bags, clean our car bags, clean the park bag, beach trash bags, apres bike bag, who knows what else /. My point is that no one ever just uses these bags once!

    I appreciate lately the recycle bins at stores to recycle your plastic bags. But to believe they are ‘one use?’ You are a fool.

  • Samuel
    September 4, 2019 at 5:35 pm

    I voted for Market Basket. My favorite is Wegman’s but it’s not on this list. They have locations in Cambridge, Burlington, Medford and Westwood. If you ever have the chance, I reccommend that you go there. It has all of the good things about Market Basket, Shaw’s and Stop and Shop combined. Market Basket is my 2nd favorite though.

  • marilu
    September 4, 2019 at 2:14 pm

    I worked at Big Y for six long yrs as my first job. This new no plastic idea wouldve made my job a little easier, i kind of wish they did it back then. I’m all for saving the planet in easy ways, but as a regular consumer now, I always forget my reusable bags, & im not paying for a stupid impossible-to-use paper one bc big y is expensive enough anyway. But I can only WISH there was a Market Basket anywhere near my town, 50 minutes away are the two closest ones, the only thing i drive about that far for is BJs every few months. Everybody tell them to build a MB out here on the edge of the 413!

  • Fuck Big Y
    September 4, 2019 at 6:17 am

    Here’s what you do to fuck these ass wipes over.

    Fill a cart proceed to check out. Leave when they charge you for the bags without paying. They can put everything back.

    The paper bags should be free. Fuck these assholes. I’ll keep my 10cents

  • Chip Prancer
    September 3, 2019 at 8:49 pm

    I also hate the Big Y because of this. They have signs claiming that they are “green” now and saving the planet. Who are they kidding? They stopped paying for plastic bags, and charge us and make money for their shitty reusable bags made in Vietnam.
    And they have gone “green?” They sell more brands and types of plastic straws then I ever knew existed. Some if them cost .25 cents for a pack of plastic straws. If they were really concerned, couldn’t they survive without selling cheap plastic straws?

  • More plastic please
    September 3, 2019 at 8:11 pm

    I refuse to recycle. I don’t see the point, its a waste of time and its giving into the sjw agenda. Fuck that. Trash is trash is to me. I love plastic bags from the grocery store. Like most people. they are used for an abundance of things and prevents me from buying trash bags. On a side note, i was listening to the jim and mush mouth show today and trenni the tranny was on as a guest host for a bit. She was gloating over her recent trip to south africa and mentioned that she brought back a present for jim. It was a black metal straw. Jim was moaning with enthusiasm and couldn’t wait to get his lips around that black pipe. Jim and mush mouth weekdays 11-2 only on 89.7 fm

  • Also Market Basket Diehard
    September 3, 2019 at 3:26 pm

    Market Basket hires at 14 . Checking out I overheard young cashiers fired up about having their own debit cards . this is more of what the world needs ! Market Basket is also Amazing because
    -Rotisserie Chickens
    -Hi – C Juice boxes
    -Paper in Plastic Bags

  • Christopher Lettiere
    September 3, 2019 at 12:05 pm

    We need more Wegmans in MA.

  • Fill the ocean with straws
    September 3, 2019 at 12:04 pm

    A couple of weeks ago they found the Titanic was literally disintegrating in the ocean, more and more each year, and they said in twenty years it would probably be gone. So if the friggin Titanic can dissolve in the ocean, why exactly are we sweating a few straws and bags?

  • I can deal with this
    September 3, 2019 at 9:02 am

    “I don’t have time to go back to my house and grab my grocery bags”
    Everytime you unload your groceries, put the empty bags in your trunk. Simple.
    “This now requires planning ahead, which I never had to do before”
    Keeping reusable bags in your trunk is “planning ahead”? Wow, you’re easily overwhelmed.
    “Those bags get disgusting too, so that’s one more chore I have to do”
    I’ve been doing it for years. I use canvas bags that can be tossed in the laundry. I can handle this simple task. Those bags are sturdier, hold more, and are easier to carry. It’ a win-win.

    • I can deal with this
      September 3, 2019 at 9:04 am

      P.S., I’m as conservative as you can get.

    • Ogden Sonin
      September 3, 2019 at 9:33 am

      Plastic bag bans encourage people to buy more plastic bags. The free plastic grocery bags are typically used a second or third time – to bring your lunch to school/work, empty the cat box, store small items, packup leftovers, etc. A million different uses. Now people have the buy separate plastic bags to fulfill these needs.

  • Cheezee Rider
    September 3, 2019 at 2:04 am

    This blog reminds me of Seinfeld. Much ado about nothing.
    Anyway, here’s my $0.02 on this mundane subject…
    Shaw’s down my way has these reusable plastic bags you can buy for $0.10 that are worth it.
    Really durable, they have handles, pretty decent overall. Honestly the first time I’ve paid the money for any kind of bag where it didn’t piss me off.
    When I pack for a bike trip like Laconia or whatever, those come in handy.
    Fukkin price chopper, big y and all the others out in the berkshires (Lee, specifically) forcing you to buy shitty paper bags can suck it. Next time I’m out there, bringing those Shaw’s bags and going to enjoy watching the hillbilly bagger’s head explode.
    My preference for shopping is MB in Bridgewater (Brockton as a second choice) and Hannaford’s, especially when I’m up to Meredith and Laconia. Wally world is ok up there, too.

  • Malph
    September 3, 2019 at 1:11 am

    Once they get plastic bags banned, then they’ll move on to the paper ones. Only the stupid cloth ones that fit nothing will be allowed. Or you can carry it home on your yellow bicycle or balanced on your head like they do in the 3rd world

  • Cheddah
    September 3, 2019 at 12:13 am

    1. Market Basket really is the best overall, no complaints whatsoever..
    2. Whole Foods is good except they’re a bit pricey and half the people that shop there are stuck up assholes..
    Oh, and anyone else notice how awful Stop&Shop is now after they settled their contract?!! That never happened with MB.

  • Jeff J
    September 2, 2019 at 11:33 pm

    Anyone who travels more than 10 minutes (unless absolutely necessary) to go to the grocery store needs to so some reevaluating. Throughout the WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR, what do you save like $40 bucks, one nickel at a time?? Your spending more in time and gas…..WAKE UP!!

    • The Vorlon
      Kosh Naranek
      September 3, 2019 at 1:20 am

      I see you have never shopped at Market Basket.

      • Jeff J
        Seriously Tho.....
        September 4, 2019 at 10:37 pm

        Lol……I live 7 minutes from one.

  • Berkshire girl
    September 2, 2019 at 10:45 pm

    We don’t have market basket in western mass but I am curious on account of all the hype. When vacationing in Maine we head to Hannaford. Convenient and not super dumpy. Fuck Big Y, that place is a cesspool. I don’t mind the bag thing, as I’ve grown accustomed to having a stash in the car for unexpected stops. UT, the the chagrin makes sense, but… slow news day?

  • Your mom
    September 2, 2019 at 10:32 pm

    Hey ill gladly buy you a bag if you promise to suffocate yourself with it so you don’t write bullshit like this. Deal?

  • Jackie
    September 2, 2019 at 10:26 pm

    They all want to ban straws and bags yet no mention of crotchfruit waste plastic wraps (disposable diapers) there’s way more plastic in the making of those then bags and straws and they take up way more space in the landfills. Hmmmmmm I wonder why?

  • politely disagree
    September 2, 2019 at 10:05 pm

    paper bags suck, like really really suck, and the only thing I hate more than them is paper straws. However, while I think you’re completely right on emissions having a greater effect on CLIMATE CHANGE, the massive amount of plastics in our ocean keep killing all our sea friends, and I really like them 🙁 I wish there was a less sucky alternative to killer plastic or piece of crap paper, though.

  • The Vorlon
    Kosh Naranek
    September 2, 2019 at 9:41 pm

    I try, real hard, not to shop in forced paper towns. PAY for bags? Homie don’t play that game. When and if the SJW’s win, I’ll roll up to Wally World, and let the drone bring it out.

    The first time the 2L soda goes through the bag and breaks my toe, they are getting served.

  • boston is a shithile
    September 2, 2019 at 9:29 pm

    i am not going to pay for paper bags
    and i am not bringing reusable bags around LIKE A GODDAM FUCKING HOBO BUM

    all my shopping is online
    grocery online shopping is a little more challenging, but i am moving that direction
    amazon and walmart is getting into the grocery delivery business
    i am now looking at pickup grocery

    for decades i use to go to portland maine, falmouth maine and southportland maine for shopping trips
    they banned plastic bags, now i NEVER go to those communities. i shop online

  • Kill the ocean
    September 2, 2019 at 8:55 pm

    I agree, I feel the more plastic that blows into the ocean the better. If we don’t kill all the sea life the sharks will eventually get us. I usually throw my straws and other plastics into any water source I can find. Its only a matter of time before the turtles are going to get us too!!

    Remember…..F the ocean and the environment!!

    • SnarkySharky
      September 2, 2019 at 10:21 pm

      Save a seal. Swim on Cape Cod.

  • z
    September 2, 2019 at 7:36 pm

    The D’Amour’s (who own Big Y) have patted themselves on the back for their whole existence.
    Sort of like Mini Bill Gates.
    They fuck you over on the price, then give to charities in their name for a tax write-off and they will
    let you know about it.
    Big Y is a supporter of a farmers coop group that wants illegals to be able to have drivers licenses in Mass.

    Not saying the charity causes are bad. Just give the fucking money and shut up.
    Someone commented on MassLive months ago over this bag issue, “But they give to the D’Amour Cancer Center at BayState!! They are such nice people!!!” Nothing stops you from saving a dime somewhere else and donating your savings to the charity of your choice. If you itemize you get the gov. to pay part of it on their dime. D’Amours are getting that with your money.

    Years ago, it was school computers and tutors on call where a student could call and get help. Again, worthy. The customer paid for it.

    I shop at ALDI. Food is food. If ALDI owned Big Y, Big Y would be a rounding error on the balance sheet. That’s how big the difference in the size of the companies are. Everything is fine but the chicken wings. The chicken wings suck. Try their frozen Cuban style pizza. Imported from Germany.

    My local Price Rite in Westfield is fine. Some Price Rites have armed security at the door (Boston Rd, Springfield + South Scranton PA).

    Is the selection fantastic? No. But who cares if it tastes good. For the stuff they don’t have, I go to Stop + Shop. Then WalMart. Then Big Y. I rarely have to go to Big Y. I’m not a fan of getting bent over at the checkout.

  • Flat brimmed hat, fat, black socks, flip flops
    September 2, 2019 at 7:13 pm

    Hey all look at me, a fat dood wearing sox with flip flops. Yup, I’m a douche.

  • Boston Resident
    September 2, 2019 at 7:02 pm

    Welcome to the life of a Boston resident . We havent had platic bags at any store since January . We have to pay for bags at every store in the city , not just the super market . Everywhere !!!

  • juror seven esq.
    September 2, 2019 at 6:45 pm

    I do the self checkout at Walmart. Help my self to the plastic bags. Double bag just about everything. Also take a fistful of the bags prepped on the rack. Have no use for them, but will wait for a windy day and hold them up to the wind and let go. I’m prepared to ask for empty card board boxes to have the bagger load my groceries into. 50 years ago worked in a market and we did this for any customer that asked. Also back them we carried the bags or boxes out to the customer’s vehicle. Just thinking, when I’m in Walmart I see their employees picking orders for customers. Going up and down the isles filling plastic bags. Something is going to have to change with that. Cardboard will become king again. Every kid will have unlimited cardboard available for use in the winter to go sliding down hills. Too bad kids don’t know anything about fun like that now a days.

    • Say no to self checkout
      September 3, 2019 at 3:12 am

      Self checkout has you doing a cashier’s job and it eliminates a paycheck for someone willing to do the work.
      Part of the price of your goods goes to payroll. Do they give you a discount for the self service?
      Personally, I’d rather wait in a line for a person to ring stuff in than take someone’s job.
      You can always grab extra bags off of that carousel thing they use.

      • juror seven esq.
        September 3, 2019 at 12:18 pm

        Small sample, but the people I see in Walmart picking orders are the same people that use to work the front end as cashier’s. Retraining is a wonderful undertaking.

  • Second knuckle
    September 2, 2019 at 6:35 pm

    Want to have fun in towns that ban stores from using plastic bags? Bring your own plastic bags and hand them to the bagger. They won’t know what the hell to do! I’ve been doing it since Looneyburg banned them. The poor kid bagging looked like he was given the choice of either eating a horse turd or rimming Whoopi Goldberg.

  • Hate the Environment
    September 2, 2019 at 6:01 pm


  • KellyMae
    September 2, 2019 at 5:58 pm

    It’s a town thing. My Market basket got rid of the plastic bags too. Only paper now. Don’t know if they’re charging for them though… could buy a resuable plastic one though….

  • BagMan
    September 2, 2019 at 5:57 pm

    Trick question, same assholes want to ban both.
    The same assholes tell me I should be concerned about my carbon footprint, when merely expressing doubts about the ban. Yet, single plastic bags have the lowest carbon footprint. The problem with plastic bags is they “end up in the ocean” and “clog recycling machines”. It’s like religion to these people, facts done matter.
    And for the record, I’m not using a smelly old hemp bag a thousand times, or carry some viscous, hardened stainless steel assault straw.
    The only reason the ban might actually help is because I’ve been hoarding half of the Earth’s plastic in the form of straws in my glove box. Before you ask, I only deal with people I know.

  • Vladimir Lenin
    September 2, 2019 at 5:39 pm

    Yes comrade. BIg Y and such stores are tools of the bourgeois to oppress the proletariat. Unite with the workers! The burgeois want nothing to do with the people and keep them out through high prices. It is time for us to control the prices! Collectivize the food stores for the united workers!

    By the way you have brought this through the central planning committee yes comrade?

  • Publius
    September 2, 2019 at 5:11 pm

    bought 500 bags on amazon for twenty bucks. never worked in grocery store so it takes me a long time to load the bags. express self checkout! enjoy the wait.

  • Value Village
    September 2, 2019 at 5:09 pm

    I go over to the produce section at Big Y and grab plastic bags and bring them up to the register.

  • Joe S
    September 2, 2019 at 4:58 pm

    The Holden Big Y was recently selling bags with Yankees players on them.
    They must be stopped.
    They must be eliminated.
    There is no joy in having a Big Y in town. Hannaford or Market Basket all the way.

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    September 2, 2019 at 4:29 pm

    I wonder if India China and Russia have banned plastic bags too – if not, the whole idea is basically useless

    Then again, SJW’s are basically useless

  • Social Justice WARRIOR
    September 2, 2019 at 4:29 pm

    I bet you wont like it when i cover you face in one of those bags.

  • Said Everyone
    September 2, 2019 at 4:22 pm

    What about BJ’s? Great place to buy stuff and the name is always funny

  • whatevuh
    September 2, 2019 at 4:21 pm

    And, what do we do with the paper bags after they are, dirty, ripped, wet, etc . . . . throw them in the trash anyway, ya know, like we did with the plastic bags . . . dumb

  • Caitlyn Jenner
    September 2, 2019 at 4:18 pm

    Wow you’re so brave.

  • tim Fenton
    September 2, 2019 at 4:12 pm

    Just look at California. Banning plastic straws while a needle goes through your sneaker, you grab your shoe in pain and face plant into some alky dude’s diarrreah from yesterday. We’re aspiring to be like that. “Teach your children.”

  • Taxman
    September 2, 2019 at 4:07 pm

    Those lawsuits must be taking a toll if you can’t even afford a fucking paper bag to lug that 3/4 empty cart.

  • Francis sidebottom
    September 2, 2019 at 3:39 pm

    Uncle turtle turd I too would rather you die than buy a paper bag for 10 cents , your contribution of death would make Massachusetts a better place

    • Kenneth powers
      September 3, 2019 at 9:18 am

      You still read the blog tho

  • Judge dread
    September 2, 2019 at 3:18 pm

    They have the same shit in Somerville. No plastic bags at any store. A hand full of delis and liquor stores still use them but that’s because they probably haven’t been fined. It chaps my ass, paper bags fucking suck.

    I bet $1 that some liberal sjw policy maker was stuck in traffic and saw a plastic bag stuck in a tree and had a complete mental break down. They probably had to engage in breathing exercises and took a fist full of anti psychotics because it was so traumatic.

  • J
    September 2, 2019 at 3:13 pm

    Dying laughing! I too live in Holden and actually travel all the fkn way to Leominster to shop at the basket, place is the bomb. Also grew up in Worcester and wouldn’t you know, one half of my under sink cabinet in the kitchen is chock full of plastic bags, what can’t you do with them?? Anyhow, the other day I had to get a few things while kiddos were at school and had no choice but to go to big y, drop $100 and still be able to hit up the express lane, unloaded each item one by one from the cart to my car since they weren’t bagged, f it. Spags had no bags and we dealt just fine without feeling like an asshole when checking out.

  • Isn't Grocery Shopping Fun
    September 2, 2019 at 3:08 pm

    Almost everything in your shopping cart is packaged with plastic. In the future, will the person behind the counter just hand you the raw ground beef? This will get interesting.

  • Screw Snowflakes
    Paper or Plastic?
    September 2, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    These sjw’s are the children of the sjw’s who wanted plastic bags offered to offset use of trees to create paper shopping bags. Why don’t these betas and anti razor people find a Jonestown and go away to live in harmony?

  • Ya
    September 2, 2019 at 3:00 pm

    No one from hubbardston in their right mind ever goes to big Y. If they do they’re fucking idiots that should probably not reproduce.

  • ace
    September 2, 2019 at 2:56 pm

    You want us to pay $10 a month to avoid ads on your crappy blogs, but you cry about 10 cents for a paper bag. Yah, that makes sense.

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