Back in March, I had written a blog at the behest of a delusional bootleg pot dealer who was upset the cops broke up his highly advertised, illegal “free pot giveaway” and towed his unregistered vehicle for being parked on a public roadway. If you haven’t read it, you can do so for some context by clicking the link below:
He’s displeased because it didn’t go the way he wanted. Oh well, the funny thing about the facts are, they are impervious to the whims of idiots.
We haven’t checked in on him since, but he recently messaged the Turtleboy Sports fan page, which I happen to be an admin on. Spoiler alert: he’s still pretty fucking crazy.
Perhaps it’s contrary to my outward appearance, but I’m not that stupid, you guys. This is a poor attempt at intimidation because Andrew, definitely is that stupid. Obviously my use of the word “bribery” is hyperbole – a commonly used literary device, and one I lean on obviously. I can’t accuse this chud of bribing me, because I work in exactly NO official capacity. Here’s the MA General Law if you feel so inclined to look into it yourself. Andrew did not, because he is an abject moron.
If you feel compelled to message me with endless video clips of a video I’ve definitely already seen because my editor made it, I already know the game, Handy Andy. You perceive his current weakness as something to be capitalized upon. Regrettably, it’s not. And I’m playing on a slightly different field here, because I am not legally required to incur the cost of counsel. In fact, I incur no legal expense representing myself pro se, and any lost wages or expense I incur responding to a baseless, frivolous suit I will seek to recover in countersuit.
I vet my work very carefully and publish a copious amount of direct source material because not only do I not want to do any undue damage to anyone with my work, I also don’t want to leave myself legally vulnerable or damage my own reputation as a writer. Let’s please remember – Turtleboy is undefeated.
But hey, if someone is looking to litigate successfully down the line, Andrew has provided quite the effective playbook in what not to do. How philanthropic of him.
- Don’t send your own appeals paperwork via private message in a feeble and pathetic attempt to misrepresent yourself as having initiated a legal complaint.
I mean, really. You can clearly make out his name in the corner and “here comes the DEFENDANT” clear across the page. A burned out, seemingly mentally ill pot dealer has pending legal action against him? Breaking news! Cool story, bro.
Literally no one here is shocked, dipshit. Likewise, no one is scared. I’ll forgive it, though, because as an idiot your are propense to believe that everyone else is, too. It’s your frame of reference, so we won’t hold it against you.
2. Don’t send a bunch of screenshots of yourself communicating with the people you distribute the marijuana products you manufacture without proper licensing as proof that you are doing “amazing”.
Not only does that reinforce the conclusion that the previous blog conveyed, it destroys any future claim of damages because you just gloated, in text, that you don’t have any. Not that you were going to be able to prove them, anyway. You were a loser before I wrote the blog, a loser after I wrote the blog, and will remain a loser for the forseeable future, all completely independent of me. Also, if by attempting to end the non productive contact you tried to shove down my throat while you threaten litigation is equal to “legal advise” in your book, you may want to seek better counsel. I won’t even get into how poorly you interpreted the law, because that’s nothing new for you here.
3. Don’t brag about how you see the blog as vulnerable due to financial constraint, and make up criminal stature that doesn’t exist.
That’s called “bad faith”, and it destroys any claim. Also, writing a blog that you didn’t like isn’t harassment. I can’t believe that with your level of legal expertise you don’t understand this. Also, the creepy “correction and discipline” bit isn’t a good look. Ominously vowing to “teach me a lesson” could certainly be interpreted as threatening and harassing.
4. Don’t play the old “stop contacting me” card like an angry preteen on Xbox live.
Be more pathetic, you can’t. All one has to do is read the conversation in its entirety, kind of like what I just did there by publishing the whole thing – to see who contacted who first – repeatedly without response. Just because you say something out loud does not make it materialize into existence here in reality. But Andrew, from what I gather, is an infrequent visitor to reality. Smoke less weed, dude. It’s making you even more mentally incompetent. Not a good look.
But anyway, guys, I am quaking in my boots and really scared, blah blah blah. This guy is clearly a legal prodigy. He handles authority really well, and all that.
I guess I’ve met my match, and he sells weed from the back of a pickup truck and on Facebook marketplace, and looks a lot like he smells of patchouli and ass.
I don’t really feel like being dragged in to court, no one does. But if we’re gonna dance, let’s dance, Cheech and Wrong. Nobody puts Bristol in the corner.