All-Star Criminals

Mike Cadena Is About To Finally Learn Why You Don’t Poke The Turtle, Because I Found The Smoking Gun In The “Help Us Save Mikey” Saga

Mike Cadena Is About To Finally Learn Why You Don’t Poke The Turtle, Because I Found The Smoking Gun In The “Help Us Save Mikey” Saga

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I’m going to keep this short, because it is very, very sweet. In the course of my never ending battle against professional gullible vagina wrangler Mike Cadena and his deplorable child exploitation/smear campaign I found even more proof of his unchallenged moral bankruptcy – and it’s looking pretty criminal. Back in late October he did this:


Organizations that apply for tax-exempt status must fit one of the applicable purposes for a nonprofit organization. Corporations may not have intent to profit, so they can’t privately benefit any person or entity. And who is benefiting from all this, openly and admittedly?



Oh, that’s right. The listed “president”, Michael B. Cadena. Whoops!

And he also signed this little number under the pains and penalties of perjury….

“I/we, the below signed incorporator(s), do hereby certify under the pains and penalties of perjury that I/we have not been convicted of any crimes related to alcohol or gaming within the past ten years.”

2015 was within the last 10 years, dumbass.

Because Facebook is perpetually too preoccupied with arbitrarily taking down pages that hurt soft gooey liberal feelings and/or post pictures of Christmas trees to recognize actual fraud, Help Us Save Mikey has been published again. For the love of God and all things holy, whatever you do, DON’T go there and post the link to this blog. Mike Cadena’s son is his world paycheck, and we wouldn’t want to upset him with clear evidence of his criminal racket, or let him know that I totally already reported this to the authorities. That would be mean.

I guess this explains why he was using his libel machine of a Facebook page to cry over “someone” taking donations, and plotting to find a way to keep receiving them undetected. Even a moron of his proportions has to understand this is fraud. Even if he doesn’t…. stupidity is not a legal defense, Mikey Mike.

And hey, Mike? Don’t have Sniffany and the gang tell Turtleboy to find evidence of fraud unless you really aren’t committing fraud – because we WILL find it. That was really pretty fucking stupid, wasn’t it? Don’t. Poke. The. Turtle.

I’ll probably be checking in with you after your arrest on here, Money Mike. I still hate you like I hate Monday morning traffic on I95.

24 Comment(s)
  • Judge dread
    December 22, 2018 at 9:09 am

    as you turtle riders know the judge doesn’t really fuck around. i’m going to keep the funding at bay for the whipping posts, but i will fully fund this dude to go on a boat in international waters, dump it, bait it, and let mother nature take care of it.

    case closed. total to the taxpayers maybe a boat ride plus market diesel price.

  • Mark Bell
    December 21, 2018 at 3:14 pm

    Sorry my original comment was not T-worthy and deleted. I questioned/criticized some items in the post…and still do. I’d appreciate your reposting if you saved it. I’ll have to remember to copy and file in order to repost….in case it was done in error. You know how to reach me to discuss anything.

    I hate to see such one-sided slamming of a father who is one of many who screw up, or not, who still are among parents deprived of seeing their child… That, in itself, is screwing the kid.
    ….and I still wonder if OUIs are relevant under the ‘alcohol and gaming’ statutes when incorporating… I’m not sure they are….

    • Shut Up
      December 21, 2018 at 6:03 pm

      Hey Mark, it’s cool if you’re in favor of fraud. Pretty sure the FBI, IRS and AGs office is not. Mike doesn’t have contact with his kid because of his own narcissistic, toxic manipulative bullshit. People like you will see every shitty criminal thing he does and shrug and say, “but he had a video of a crying kid and was wearing a polo”…..thank God the courts aren’t as dumb as that.

    • December 25, 2018 at 10:38 pm

      Ok, so let’s take the MULTIPLE DUIs out of the equation, if that satisfies you. We’re still left with a self centered chudstuffer filing for tax exempt status solely for his own benefit. HUSM isn’t a charity – it’s a racket set up for one idiot who couldn’t be bothered to show up for court, who essentially kidnapped his son and took him 1,000 miles away from his mother, grandparents and sibling. I see you like to tout father’s rights, Mark. Is this the face the father’s right movement should have? A violent ex con who is so vindictive he fabricated abuse allegations to alienate his child’s mother and smeared them all over the internet, to his own financial benefit? If he was a chick you’d all be losing your minds. How soon you all forget, we have the PRC report he loves to reference? Have you read it? I have. Not one of his claims is substantiated in there. NOT. ONE. Maybe you missed the first few blogs I wrote on this subject – I conferred with experts on the subject of parental alienation and all concurred, Mike is guilty as fuck. This isn’t a case of the courts depriving a father of his child – this is a case of a father attempting to deprive his child of his mother – half of his identity, in the most unconscionable manner imaginable, and failing, then crying when he’s forced to play by the rules. Deceptively garnering donations, using the internet to threaten the mother of his child and the judge who dared hold him to any sort of reasonable expectations. Mike doesn’t have the authority or right to terminate his ex’s parental relationship with their child any more than a vindictive mother would, were the roles reversed. No rhetoric you try to attach will change that fact. Why would you even want to support that sort of precedent being set? How does that help Father’s rights at all? Sorry that we wouldn’t play to his agenda, that’s not how things work here. If he was half the concerned father he played on the internet, he’d take down that vile slander machine of a Facebook page, go get a job and stop begging for donations from bored gullible housewives, and comply with the courts. Children deserve access to both parents, it’s unfortunate his kid got stuck with a sperm donor that lets his resentment and ego get in the way of, you know, actually being a parent. FYI, from what I understand, Mikey is doing well where he is, as well as can be expected after what his father did to him. Amber Buck has remained silent, not so much as a peep disparaging Mike, and her attorney gives very limited comment, as is appropriate in a custody case, and no matter how much he tries to push the contrary, this IS a custody case. And a nasty one, thanks to Money Mike! I think this has played out as well as it could, given the circumstances. When Mike ends up in jail, and the pants sued off of him for libel and defamation, it will be a well deserved end. That child was never abused, and to try and attach that stigma to him at the tender age of 4 is appalling. See that 501c3 application up there? With or without the DUI factored in, it’s fraudulent. Mike, and only Mike, benefits from that money – it’s NOT nonprofit. Great guy you’re going to bat for there. Take off your tin foil hat and go find an actual father to defend, leave this mess alone. Or don’t, it’s your credibility.

  • Y
    December 21, 2018 at 11:07 am

    Don’t forget to donate to get the border wall built:

    • Mark Bell
      December 26, 2018 at 7:38 am

      Thanks for the reply Bristol. I have a time issue right now. Please allow me a short response.

      This is not tin foil hat stuff, and I don’t feel Mike went about all of it correctly. I’m more concerned about the lawyer he had representing him and why she went as far as she did in the direction it seems she did. It’s hard to imagine you did a better job checking it all out than she did. I’m into “fair” being the bottom line. This has not been to either parent, and certainly not for Mikey…and it still seems not. The true alienating parent lasts a lifetime for the child… I guess in time we’ll see who that is.

      I’m also interested in who you sourced for parental alienation. Seems MA, and other states, put a lid on anything to do with that after Gardner killed himself, back when. I love the fact that you are researching in that direction, though.

      More later. And again, thanks for the response.

      • December 26, 2018 at 10:33 am

        I didn’t source anyone from the State of Massachusetts, with the exception of one family law attorney practicing in MA. – I spoke to a tenured professor at Vanderbilt university and two child psychologists all of whom are sitting members on a national panel on the matter of parental alienation. Our conversations revolved around the documentation sent to us by Shannon Hines and Lisa Boudreau, as well as court documents (including transcripts) from the case. I have since expanded my connections to several study groups and family rights activists, nationwide. The general consensus has been that Mike took calculated steps to alienate the mother of his child that are clearly reflected in the documentation surrounding this case. Most notable to me from the beginning was the fact that Ms. Buck was not initially pursuing custody, as Mike suggests, but instead was simply seeking parenting time, which Mike actively avoided at all costs, going so far as to subject his child to needless exams (Mikey had NO injuries whatsoever at the time of the PRC exam, as is documented in the report), constant invasive recording of his life (a MA pediatrician seeing Mikey testified in court that she had to advise Mike to stop recording his child while he undressed for an exam), and what appears to be a great deal of brainwashing. The police station video, in particular, was largely concerning to unilaterally every expert source I conferred with, as the circumstances surrounding the transfer were extremely unfair to the child, needlessly chaotic and appear to be purposely placing him in fear. This assertion was further corroborated when we discovered conversation between Mike, Shannon and other “supporters” planning to videotape Mikey’s reaction. Very disturbing stuff.
        There has never been any evidence to corroborate Mike’s claims that he fled Illinois out of genuine fear for his life, as there are not police reports, orders of protection, etc. related to Ms. Buck, or anyone, for that matter, outside of an ex girlfriend of Mike’s who resides in Massachusetts. Furthermore, Mike’s assertion in court affidavits that were he to return to Illinois his “PTSD” would “return” is so deceptive it’s laughable – that is simply not how trauma works in the human brain, there is no geographic cure.
        Although I wouldn’t venture to assess the thoroughness of counsel’s “checking” of the situation/case, I would point out that at the end of the day counsel works for the client, and is obligated, and paid, to represent their expressed interests. Even if the abuse allegations Mike has platformed his entire legal case and public appeal on were substantiated (and they are 100% unsupported, per the documentation provided by his team), no competent attorney would ever advise publicizing a custody case and its details on social media – quite the opposite. From what I understand, as we do have court watchers observing this case at this point, Mike is experiencing any “deprivation” of his child are his own actions and the damage they have caused to said child. He still refuses to comply with the court, choosing to continue his efforts online, despite the expressed concern of the current judge at the last hearing, instead. Mikey was connected with a therapist immediately upon reuniting with his mother, and even phone contact must be approached gently, as Mike has demonstratively shown little to no insight into the psychological effects his actions have had on his son, ironically enough, given Mike’s stance on the issue. I’ve spoken to members of his family as well, who have further illuminated the issue, and given their description of Mike’s character, background and apparent motivation in this, I can’t say that at this time I see barring him from contact with his son much of a tragedy at all. From all I have read, seen and heard – and it’s a lot, from many different sources – I’d say that this is best until (unless) Mike is able to resolve his own internal issues, reflect on the consequences his poor choices have had on his child, and proves himself able and willing to truly put his child first and his own ego and needs aside. It 100% requires a tin foil hat and some extremely complicated mental gymnastics to arrive at the conclusion that Mike Cadena is somehow a victim of the courts, he simply is not. He is a victim of circumstances he himself created in his efforts to spite his ex. There is so much I was constrained from publishing – but I assure you, my assessment of this situation was not come by quickly or without merit. I think if you are able to objectively read through the volumes of writing I have done on this subject, you would easily be able to read the evolution in tone from simple skepticism to utter disgust. I believe in parent’s rights, therefore, I am appalled by Mike Cadena. Cases like this bolster the negative public perception of the Father’s Rights movement in particular, which I find to be extremely unfair, because not every father who fights for the rights to his children operates like Mike Cadena.

        • Mark Bell
          December 26, 2018 at 2:03 pm

          I’m amazed and impressed with the quality of your journalism and research.
          Why it’s “styled” as deprecating story, it’s characteristic and at the level of the best MSM brilliance. Sometimes when people are in tough circumstances, I tell them to just let the info make the story. While a lot of your conclusions may be over many heads, you certainly did the work to substantiate them. There are a lot of lessons in all of this with Mike….good lessons for all. It IS an amazing case study.

          I’ll add that you seemed to do a lot of research on BOTH sides. Especially in corrupt court cases, a lot of background stuff that is part of cases and their context never makes it to records….in fact, a lot of information gets ignored or buried and lives only in context of charges that are built on false accusations and settlements. As I’ve always maintained, our system fries Rubin Carter and vindicates OJ, and it goes downhill from there with many areas of brilliance that truly protect many. Aside from that, it’s political on the average day. Both sides’ analysis shows the difference.

          Thanks for your attention to this story. Thanks also for responding to me so completely. Seems the Turtle was right, right off the bat, and now I see dozens of reasons why.

          • December 26, 2018 at 2:52 pm

            Absolutely no problem at all. I can be reached at if you have any other questions related to the veracity of my coverage.

  • Hugh-Bo Mont
    December 21, 2018 at 10:40 am

    Well done, BT!

    • ThisIsMySarcasticTone
      December 21, 2018 at 8:08 pm

      Aren’t the mongolians– I mean mexicans supposed to pay for that, oh great emperor Huang?

  • Maggie the Cat
    December 21, 2018 at 10:24 am

    Another great expose! Thanks to TB and all concerned.

  • Ungawah
    December 21, 2018 at 8:06 am

    Normally, I’d be making a joke about this, but he played the kid against the system. All he ever cared about was winning against the wife. He didn’t care about the kid. The fact that he used the kid makes it even slimmer. Im sure he didn’t dream this up on his own, he’s too stupid for that. He had help. A lot of help. I hope they all pay the price. I hope the mom is giving this kid the best Christmas in the world! He deserves it. Big Mike deserves a beating and a stint in jail.Any chance we can get an update pn the kid and his mom sometime?

  • Exit 69
    December 21, 2018 at 7:56 am

    Smoked! What a fucking dope. Well, there’s a light atctgevendvif the tunnel, cause he will be going away soon….

    • Lol
      December 21, 2018 at 6:41 pm

      Hey now, Strokey! The light what tunnel? Dang tiny phone keyboards!

  • The original old school goalie guy
    December 21, 2018 at 7:42 am

    Please remind me to NEVER piss Bristol off. When are these idiots gonna realize that once the turtle has you, it ain’t gonna be pretty. Why would you double down and continue? Mikey gets what he deserves, that poor child, not so lucky. Merry, Merry Bristol, nice work, f him.

  • Noseface
    December 21, 2018 at 6:55 am

    You do realize that anyone viewing this story on a mobile phone can’t read any of those documents because they are too small and blurry right? The hundreds of pop up ads are crystal clear though.

    • z
      December 21, 2018 at 5:52 pm

      But the twitter tweets are in 300 point so it all balances out.
      You aren’t reading it on 65 inch flat screen?
      I am and had to blow it up 4-500% to read it.

      Still, good work BT. In a normal state, crap like that would get him in more trouble.
      But, this isn’t a normal state.

    • E
      December 22, 2018 at 5:05 am

      Throw it on airplane mode with wifi; no pop ups

      • E
        December 22, 2018 at 8:59 am

        I stand corrected i got that annoying one that kicks you right back to the top of the page but only a couple times

  • The Vorlon
    The Vorlon
    December 21, 2018 at 5:59 am

    That picture of Mikey? It looks like someone plugged his anal probe into 480 Volts and turned it on full.

  • Blahhhhhhh
    December 21, 2018 at 3:31 am

    Pic of the bill or it didn’t happen.

    He’s got money to pay for his business ventures and overpriced lawyers because of his own fuck ups. But you can’t gofundme for that, who would donate for that? But clever! Put your kid’s mental health on blast. “People eat that shit up”, he mischievously considers. So transparent.

    My heart hurts for his son.

  • Mike Cardenas gaping ass
    December 21, 2018 at 2:53 am

    That’s incriminating. Someone is gonna get it rough in prison….ouch!

    • Top TurtleFan
      December 21, 2018 at 3:26 am

      I can’t wait to see the spin his peeps try and put on this little nugget! I have a feeling Good isn’t the only one that can ‘judge’ on this one Mikey. Merry Christmas!

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