Angel’s Restaurant in Palmer is a family owned small business that like many has struggled to get by due to the unconstitutional lockdowns on private businesses by Governor Charlie Parker. But to make matters even worse some raw dog ruffians pulled a chew and screw the other day, which they posted about on Facebook.

She tracked the license plate number and it came back to a chick named Heaven Germain. I shit you not – Heaven. That’s like being a pedophile named Chuck E Cheese. You can’t be named after a place you’ll never get into. The owner then messaged Heaven.

Shortly after the post was made this guy showed up in the comments to defend their honor.

His name is Will Mosely, and I quickly noticed that he’s Facebook friends with Clarence Woods Emerson and had messaged me in the past, trying to get TB to roast some of his enemies.

As you can see here we have some pubestache on pubestaches crime going on. And since all parties involved live in Palmer, they are required by law to rock a pubestache at all times. Pro tip – if you’re gonna try to weaponize Turtleboy to go after ratchets for doing ratchet things, don’t defend ratchets when they do ratchet things. And that’s exactly what Willie Whiskers did – claimed that they left because of hair in their food, not because they pulled a chew and screw.

Keep in mind, he was not at the restaurant when this happened. These are just his friends, and according to him he was with them at the police station filing formal charges against a restaurant because they were the victim of a chew and screw.

So the Palmer Police told them after the confessed to committing a crime that they would’ve done the same thing. That definitely happened. Definitely.

Now he says they’re being charged.

The fact that this woman is being so nice to this worthless piece of shit is enraging. She’s a lot nice than I’m gonna be.

He also believes that restaurants “should understand that some people lose appetites over certain things,” therefore they don’t have to pay for food that they ordered.

Oh look, they didn’t just walk up and leave because of a hair in their food, nor did they alert management. They ate half their meal and walked out because that’s what you do when you’re a trashbag from Palmer.

Then Heaven showed up in the comments section of the Facebook page belonging to the business owner who she stole from, to once again accuse them of having hair in her food.

They eat out all the time. Does this look like a couple that has to buy food at the grocery store?

The baller lifestyle in Palmer is real.

But Volunteers in Heaven probably should’ve gotten her story straight with Willie Whiskers, because he claimed there were exactly 12 hairs in the food which she denied.

She don’t need to show proof of the hair! We should just take her word for it. If you can’t trust a face like this then who can you trust?

She was obviously raised right.

“I wouldn’t be the person I am without him.”

You chew and screw at family owned businesses in your small town. That’s the person you are thanks to your Dad, who clearly failed you as a father.

Then the the guy who’s pumping her full of Palmer love juices showed up to defend her honor, claiming that he showed up at the restaurant.

And he posted a video of the encounter.

Of course he has a pubestache too. This is Palmer after all.

Just to review, he stood outside of the restaurant for 45 seconds, didn’t alert them that he was there, baselessly claimed he went to the police station and had hair in his food, and thought this all proved something.

The man just oozes sex appeal. No wonder Heaven on Girth can’t get enough of his bologna baton.

Hot.

You’d think that Chew and Screwbaca would’ve paid their bill with their savings from the prior day when coffee at Dunkin’s was free, thanks to Willie Whiskers.

But I guess not.

You’ll also notice that they walked out with a coffee too. Don’t worry, another local guttermuppet has an explanation for that.

Yea, bringing an outside drink into a restaurant to avoid having to order a drink there isn’t a trashy thing to do at all. Wonder what the odds are that Smitty here is rocking the pubestache?

If your life goal is to get Post Malone to see your bathroom selfie, and you urge people to share it, and then you don’t get a single like or share, you should probably just give up on life. Just sayin.

If you actually got a plate full of hairy food at a restaurant it would be natural to be revolted. The appropriate response would be to bring it to the attention of the server, who would then bend over backwards to make it right for you. But of course that obviously never happened, and these assholes just didn’t feel like paying money for their food, and since they produce nothing of value for society it’s hard for them to understand the struggles of owning a small business. But in the name of fairness I messaged “Chase Sin” to get his side of the story and see if he had any pictures of the hairy food. First he wanted to make it clear that he should be off limits because he’s only 20, and if he wanted to he could’ve afford to purchase a $100 meal. Also, they’re racist because he’s Spanish.

The word is Latino dipshit. If you’re gonna pretend to be a minority for pity points at least get the verbiage down.

He was very excited when he found out I was from Turtleboy, and told me he had been praying for my intervention.

He said he looks up to me.

Something tells me this is not how he envisioned the blog going.

According to him he has the very Spanish name of Jason Bravo.

And him and his cum pinata girlfriend (who he calls his wife) go out to eat every day.

He loves supporting local businesses. And by that he doesn’t mean actually paying his bill, he means liking their Facebook page.

It’s just so enraging because they hurt this business owner, who is clearly a very nice person already being unfairly harmed by the government’s reaction to a virus with a 99.9% recovery rate. Then these maggots add onto the misery by pulling a stunt like this. And when they had the audacity to post about how they were robbed by these worthless bags of baby dicks, the ratchets attacked them some more, played the victim, and made up lies to justify their own shitty behavior.

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