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So many turtle riders have messaged us about this link they found on Facebook marketplace:
Yup. It’s her – the Fall River Guttermuppet.
And now she wants to clean your house for $10. Ya got that? For less than it will cost her in food stamps to Uber her way to your house, she will clean it for you thoroughly. Nothing shady about that price whatsoever. It’s not like she’s the kind of person to rob you blind or anything like that. The Fall River Guttermuppet is a morally upright, law abiding citizen.
This ad has appeared on people’s marketplaces all over the south shore, Rhode Island, Connecticut, and Worcester County. She’s like a disease that keeps spreading!! We just thought people should be aware that if you do end up hiring her because the price can’t be beat, she’s probably gonna end up raiding your medicine cabinet. Just sayin.
The best is her bio:
If you need your apartment or house cleaned in time for the new year. Please don’t hestiate to reach out to me. I offer professional, respectful, and great service all and all.
In time for the new year? The Chinese new year? Because I think it’s the year of the cheesehog. Nevertheless I’m sure her service is “professional.” And by that she means she brings her own paper towels that she just stole from Walmart.
She just won’t go away. I have been chronicling the Turtleboy Ratchet Madness runner up for over a year now. You can read about her greatest hits by clicking here, or just reading about her greatest hits:
Like the time when……
……she started a GFM because she’s a single mom, asked the entire city of Fall River to co-sign a loan for her because her car got repo’d:
Or when she went straight crazy, recording us a hysterical video diary, we found out her husband was a toddler rapist, and her mom sold her out to Turtleboy for being a pathological liar:
Or when she was searching for her estranged pedophile husband, with his 16 year-old girlfriend, because he allegedly got hit by a snow plow and was dead in a snowbank somewhere:
Or when she was scamming on yard sale sites by selling broken shit and blocking people when they wanted their money back:
Or that time she was looking to give her kids away for the weekend on a Facebook yard sale page because she wanted to go play hide the mushroom with her assumed-dead pedophile ex-husband. That’s when a bunch of Turtle riders tried to intervene, to keep the kids safe, by setting her up and calling the cops:
And the final chapter was when she was in a homeless shelter and the mandated reporters witnessed ungodly acts of abuse upon her children and DCF finally removed them:
I was asking Uncle Turtleboy if she was eligible for Ratchet Madness again this year. He told me no because she hadn’t done much in the last calendar year to justify making the tournament. But this might get her back in, she’ll just an underdog this time around. Either way, I’m counting on her doing something extremely ratchet before April to guarantee her slot.