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Today’s insane conspiracy theory appears to have been deduced by a learned young scholar who goes by “YungDrae”, so you know it’s bulletproof. According to YungDrae, and countless other gullible morons on Reddit, there is a definitive trail of breadcrumbs leading right up to the startling revelation that Donald Trump is a time traveler.
I will give credit where credit is due, because the mental gymnastics required to arrive at the conclusion that the 45th and current President of the United States is a time traveler cruising around in secret technology made by notorious loon and internet cult superstar, Nikola Tesla, are impressive to say the least. I was honestly slightly tired when I was done chasing down every crazy lead.
I’m going to debunk the shit out of this one, anyway.
It all centers around a couple late 19th century books written by a guy named Ingersoll Lockwood that nobody has ever heard about and otherwise no one would ever have heard of. He was a lawyer who “dabbled” in writing shitty books that commercially flopped and were critically panned, a fantasy type novel called “Baron Trump’s Marvelous Underground Journey,” and a work of speculative fiction titled, “1900, or, The Last President”.
Actually, it’s “Barron”, but OK. We’ll just count it phonetically.
They don’t look like the same person, YungDrae. That’s a drawing of a potato in a Pope robe.
…Might as well tie in a more accepted conspiracy. How much weed did you smoke, Yungdrae?
So, “Baron Trump’s Marvelous Underground Journey,” is an actual book, but it is actually the second Baron Trump book, written four years after the first, “Travels and adventures of Little Baron Trump and his wonderful dog Bulger”. Both are whimsical stories that clearly rip off “Alice in Wonderland,” about the magical adventures of a young German baron named Wilhelm Heinrich Sebastian Von Troomp. “Don” is a Spanish title, and is used as such in this 124 year old shitsmear of a novel. The book is full of alternate dimensions, monsters, giants, demons, and a long trip into the land of “Queen Galaxa.” It has nothing to do with the President’s son outside of the name.
In 1896, Lockwood again tried to write something that wouldn’t be savagely ripped to shreds by literary critics, and failed yet again with “1900, or The First President.” It’s not a sequel, and has nothing to do with either of the Baron Trump books. I wouldn’t expect YungDrae to understand the definition of a “sequel”, so we’ll give him another mulligan.
Oh, a book about a wealthy, Fifth Avenue-dwelling tycoon and political outsider whose populist “common man” rhetoric and massive reform of the monetary system inspires violent protests and eventually a full-on civil war that brings down the country! Spooky! It’s almost like a speculative piece of political fiction has never appeared eerily prophetic in retrospect before!
Oh, for fuck’s sake…..
It wouldn’t be a real tinfoil hat internet conspiracy, though, without an appearance from this guy:
Do you understand how WRONG the physics is that we are taught?
Do you understand the realities of zero-point energy and antigravity, how it’s been suppressed, & how advanced we’d be right now if it wasn’t?
Your worldview understanding won’t be ahead of the game until you do. pic.twitter.com/kVLbuNSIxy
— Jordan Sather (@Jordan_Sather_) June 10, 2018
“Alien” = not from the US, you shit for brains.
Well, Yung, actually it’s his uncle, but don’t let silly little things like “facts” and “reason” get in your way here. Although this is otherwise factually accurate, Nikola Tesla was a most likely autistic nutjob who over promised and under delivered to the point of delusion, his notebook full of ideas was total useless dogshit, and John Trump knew it.
If you’ve been able to follow this line of nonsense so far, in summation some tinfoil hat wearing hoodbooger “figured out” a late 19th century failed author either had some kind of divine vision about Trump becoming president or that Trump somehow went back in time himself to write them, thanks to technology invented by Nikola Tesla. And naturally, he’s been hiding this time travel ability ever since. And he presented his well researched and reasoned thesis on Snapchat, of course.
And just for good measure…..
Jesus fucking Christ. Stop the ride, I’m getting off.