Smiles And Sunshine

We Need Your Help To Trigger SJWs – Vote Turtleboy Best Local News Outlet So We Can Claim What Is Rightfully Our’s


It’s that time of the year again folks – time to vote Turtleboy Sports best local news outlet so that Walter Bird is forced to give us our award again. You can vote for us by clicking hereVotes can be placed between March 7th and March 28th. In order for your vote to be counted you go to categories and choose “City Life:”

Then scroll down to Local News Source:

And you know what to do from there.

We won “best blog” in 2015 and 2016, but they got rid of that category for 2017.

No sweat because we ended up winning because Local News Source instead.

Last year we didn’t really tell people to vote because we figured it was a foregone conclusion. We ended up getting runner-up to the Turtlegram and Gazette, which was obviously the result of our followers not caring, and the Turtlegram leading a campaign to stuff the ballot box. It was a real tortoise vs. hare situation. Obviously we didn’t accept it because we’re not the Colts and we don’t accept participation trophies, even though we beat Worcester Magazine in their own poll.

So whatever you do, DO NOT register multiple times using different email addresses so you can vote for Turtleboy over and over and over again. Please!!

In all honesty, we earned it, and we deserve it. We break news that no one else does. Biblowgate, Genduso, Greg Bates, Candy Dennis, Franklin Smollett, Juicin Jeremy, and so many others. No one else has scoops like us. They just report police press releases and other stuff that’s already been made public. They report what we’ve already reported and pass it off on their own. And we do it while being sued by a billion people, publishing books, getting constant death threats, and we all have real jobs too. We beat newspapers with hundreds of employees on stories that they really should have, but they don’t because we’re better than them at journalisming.

Usually there’s a requirement that says you have to vote for 20 different categories for your ballot to count, but it doesn’t say anything about that this year. Either way, you should still vote for 20 different categories, even if you don’t know who any of them are, just in case. Just think about how the SJWs will react and it will all be worth it:

Screen Shot 2017-04-20 at 8.00.05 PMScreen Shot 2017-04-20 at 8.00.16 PM


Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:

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Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 


25 Comment(s)
  • Me Likey TBS
    March 22, 2019 at 11:28 pm


  • Sushi
    March 22, 2019 at 10:59 pm

    Best news outlet? I’m not seeing any foodie reviews, no having sushi on Water Street in a plastic bubble.
    You call yourself a news outlet?
    For shame.

  • Raw Dog
    March 22, 2019 at 10:48 pm

    Sorry but I won’t do it.
    I’ve been following TB for years and kudos to TB for struggling on even after he lost his wife and kids, all his sponsors left and now I’ve heard his mom isn’t going to pay for his house and his bills anymore.
    That’s all character building I guess, the reason I won’t vote the site for best Worcester blog is because 99% of the stories aren’t about Worcester.
    I honestly don’t give a fuck about Conn. skanks, RI welfare pimps or Cape Cod coon criminals.
    Please, go back to what made your blog popular by being funny and covering WORCESTER issues again.

  • Pop-ups suck
    March 22, 2019 at 9:29 pm

    The content on your site is awesome, but the site itself is the most pop-up ridden website I’ve ever seen. I know you have to make a living but the pop-ups fucking suck donkey cock.

    • DQ
      March 22, 2019 at 10:12 pm

      “donkey cock”

      Randall Guy approves

  • Farting in your general direction
    March 11, 2019 at 9:07 pm

    Done it was my pleasure!

  • Big Wick
    March 11, 2019 at 7:50 pm

    I’m out of town, but you have my vote(s) (heh-heh). I’ll do what I can to make that SJW Gretta Prostate go nuclear.

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Elder Nathan Phillips
    March 11, 2019 at 6:01 pm

    Turtleboy Sports is fake news.

    • Heterosexual Seth MacFarlane
      March 12, 2019 at 5:59 am


  • Francis Sidebottom
    March 11, 2019 at 4:11 pm

    Uncle turtle turd is a social justice warrior and wants you to fund his campaign of shame , uncle turtle turd is a hypocrite

    • dball31211
      March 11, 2019 at 7:33 pm

      Can someone please get Francis a tampon preferably super plus! His gash just keeps spewing.
      Randall must keep some in his purse.

    • Francis Sidebottom's Brain
      March 11, 2019 at 9:33 pm

      I assure you. Francis does not speak for the both of us.

  • Y
    March 11, 2019 at 4:03 pm

    FYI, you can only vote once if you’re using the same browser on the same desktop, phone, etc.

    • werehereforyou
      March 22, 2019 at 11:05 pm

      Dear mister or ms or mrs y.
      You’re a twat.
      You have no comprehension of the ways of the …..what your mother calls ….the cyberpace tubes intergalactic ways of the internet.
      But we’re here for you.
      We’ll meet you at the Blarney Stone at 2 PM tomorrow.

  • Walter "I whack off alone" Bird
    March 11, 2019 at 3:59 pm

    It’s rigged. Vincent’s dumps listed over and over. And no choice for Konnie Lukes. Just the dipshits.

  • EmailSpamBot@50k.votes
    March 11, 2019 at 3:46 pm

    I swear I didn’t vote for you more than once; you should win by a mile.

  • Travis Rearick
    March 11, 2019 at 3:41 pm

    When registering, the gender section lists ONLY TWO GENDERS. What in bigotry is going on over at Worcester Magazine?!?!?!?!

  • Who wins??
    March 11, 2019 at 3:41 pm

    ……And the award for biggest douchebag commenter on TBS

    1. Randall
    2. Francis
    3. Wwy

    • Randall Fagman
      March 11, 2019 at 6:48 pm

      Randall sucks white cock

    • True Reality Speaks
      Give a Lib a Throat Punch
      March 11, 2019 at 7:29 pm

      Why would anyone care? Honestly? Comments from basement dwellers looking for attention because only Mommy knows they are alive? Don’t give any of them the satisfaction that someone actually reads their pathetic, hidden pleas for help.

    • randiguy2006
      Randall Guy
      March 12, 2019 at 12:49 pm

      Thank you! I win!!!!!!

  • Clitty Litter
    March 11, 2019 at 3:40 pm


  • Phong
    March 11, 2019 at 3:39 pm

    You should be under pest control with all the rats and roaches you take out.

    • TheCureForHope
      March 11, 2019 at 3:53 pm

      Epic comment!

    • Larry Hoover
      March 11, 2019 at 6:56 pm

      Were talking comment OF THE YEAR!!

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