Smiles And Sunshine

Whiny Cunts Complain About Turtle Club Not Being Free 


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Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 


52 Comment(s)
  • Aidens Wife has YUGE shoulders
    September 24, 2021 at 10:07 am

    Aiden is a little big man who we all know was amd is a loner with no friends. It’s clear he is fucked up but sometimes is funny. That’s about it but in no way worth paying for. O friends. Period. That blog he writes ALL the time defending his removal as a teacher is a clear insight into his madness and the one about him being in every pic of every club in school shows his fringe reality. His wife is fucking freaky with those YUGE shoukders and neck but let’s face it…it’s the best either could achieve. His kids are going to have some reckoning to do as they grow up knowing their dad is was he she pronouns some weird alter ego. Shits on his readers and regularly declares himself both sad and mentally unstable then at the same time states he is built for defending free speech and some court warrior. Fucked up.

  • DudeRanchStripClub (me/mine pronouns)
    September 24, 2021 at 8:10 am

    At least you admit that its a pay wall, next step admitting you need someone to talk to.

  • Bill staxx
    September 23, 2021 at 11:07 pm

    Some of the turtle riders are some of the most pathetic dregs on society and they are the ones aiden wants as a listener. Bro, you are my boy but stop shitting on people who dont care about your income. Do you care about theirs?

    • Charlie Cracker
      September 24, 2021 at 8:09 am

      You need to improve your vocabulary, bro.

      It’s a drag on society. Or the dregs of society. Stop smoking so much dope and your head will clear up.

  • Billy Tibbets
    September 23, 2021 at 9:45 pm

    I’ve been on turtle boy plenty of times and it was always free. I wouldn’t be the man I am today if it wasn’t for this blog.

  • Turtle Rider Profile
    September 23, 2021 at 9:40 pm

    Yep, that woman in the pic right there is your typical “Turtle Rider” who has been donating her money for years and defending him hahahahaha!
    I feel so bad for these suckers but …wait a minute doesn’t she also go as Spic Tormentor/Orion?

  • Erin Thrown Underbus
    September 23, 2021 at 9:26 pm


  • Only in America
    September 23, 2021 at 9:10 pm

    So A middle aged unemployed guy who’s constantly complaining about getting banned from using free sites like Facebook, Twitter, PayPal etc. with all of his free fake accounts is calling people cunts for them not paying him their money to read his constant crying about being banned from free sites?
    Only in America

  • TwiichTv:\\Coolguygirlsloveme
    September 23, 2021 at 8:46 pm

    Peace Turtlebro I follow all 47 of your social media accounts you are as we say in the onlineosphere one jive Turkey.
    There’s nothing cooler on the net than a guy as old as you still layin it down clappin and slappin back and pretending like you’re still in college or High School wit sharp DM’s but what you really need is to start a TikTok dance.
    Maybe a TikTokTurtleTwist with that homoerotic sidekick of yours touching toes and slapping five!
    You go get em Tiger

    September 23, 2021 at 7:27 pm

    Get over it you assholes , where else can you post your demented drivel. If this site were closed you would have to send your posts to your mother via texts.

    • Sinking Ship
      September 24, 2021 at 1:55 am

      Nah, it’s just fun watching karma catch up with this queefbiscuit.

      Does Aidan towel his jizz off your face like a gentleman or is he more of a selfish lover? Your lips must be raw from all that dick suckin’

        September 24, 2021 at 3:44 pm

        If you are not blowing loads on every article on this site.
        You are attacking the Turtle.
        If you were no longer able to post on this site, what would you do with your sad pathetic lives.
        I will tell you what, you can go and sniff the ground on JaJa’s grave while choking your chicken while your mother videos it.

  • Genduso
    September 23, 2021 at 6:54 pm

    Aiden i love you bro but you are the one that looks like a douchebag right now

  • Evicted fuckin Neighbor
    September 23, 2021 at 6:46 pm

    So get this shit, this one time I paid for wifi. What a fuckin scam, you can just break into crackheads basements and steal that shit. Then it’s bonus points if the have a canoe and chickens in the backyard. Lube is optional bitches. Toss me them passwords

  • randiguy2006
    September 23, 2021 at 4:48 pm

    I guess your wife’s had enough, huh?

  • Torpedo Tom
    September 23, 2021 at 3:45 pm

    ‘It’s all for my fight for freedom of speech!” Fuck outta here. It’s because you couldn’t handle a real job. You failed as a teacher and you have no marketable skills. I guess you think your readers are that dumb that they can’t see through you.

    In a family full of successful, high achieving people, you’re an utter embarrassment. You’ve carved yourself out a little niche of shitting all over strangers for a shred of local “fame”, so you can compensate for your insecurities and feel like you’re not the absolute loser you are.

    You’re a textbook narcissist who has no idea what humility or empathy are. You loove the attention. Makes you feel like a big man. Dollars to donuts, you got bullied a lot as a kid.

    As far as paying for your club, I come here to read some blurbs about dirt bags while I’m taking a shit. Nobody wants to spend their hard earned money to hear your opinion on some dead president nobody remembers.

    Now get back to entertaining me with your blogs about dumpster fires. Dance for me, monkey. Dance.

    • Ppmass
      September 23, 2021 at 4:15 pm

      You buried him with that “taking a shit” line. Although this is not the end of Turtle-PanHandler, it is quite the diminisher. He has no idear how to deal with this community or any community!

      • Torpedo Tom
        September 23, 2021 at 5:30 pm

        I think a lot of Riders are starting to open their eyes. He’s a lying, phony grifter who got caught cheating on his wife. He has said more than once that Turtle Riders are “stupid.” All you need to know about how little respect he has for his readers is this article.

        Don’t wanna give him free money? You’re a “whiny cunt.” Oh yeah, I forgot it’s not panhandling because he provides such a valuable journalistic service like Ratchet Madness! My bad. He’s totally not at all like the people he blogs about.

        For someone who dishes it out, he is literally the most sensitive crybaby snowflake.

        Anybody who hurts his delicate little ego is the target of his rage. He even threw devoted fans under the bus by revealing commenter identities in court. Shit, look at Gaffney. They were butt buddies until Aidan had no use for him anymore, and we all know how THAT turned out. Wouldn’t shut the fuck up about him for 6 months.

  • Ordell Creatin
    September 23, 2021 at 3:42 pm

    I think all the cheetos, masturbating and raydon caused your blindness to all of your turtle followers and to being a proper provider as a father and husband!

  • Phil Osifer
    September 23, 2021 at 3:29 pm

    When you have to get an allowance from your own spouse to spread this manure about and not just charge for it but to plead with her every night that you’re contributing to your own familys needs by being a solid provider should leave one to believe they are on an acid trip. Give up while your still behind!

  • Alexander Rich-Shea
    Alexander Rich-Shea
    September 23, 2021 at 3:29 pm

    TL;DR: Fuck you. Pay me.

  • Boston Irish
    Boston Irish
    September 23, 2021 at 2:49 pm

    Shut it down and get out of the basement , it’s over. Go get a real fucking job

  • Charlie Cracker
    September 23, 2021 at 2:48 pm

    Aiden don’t just hate the folks who post comments and don’t bother with his TBDaily News. He hates everyone.

  • CalmWhiteDad
    September 23, 2021 at 2:32 pm

    In my defense, I never watched the free JewTube videos anyway because they were not good and the voice/face combo is insufferable. The articles have continued to decline in quality over the past 3 years and the misspellings/typos are frustrating to read. Beyond that, you’re very aggressive about your dislike towards your readers. There is literally zero reason to pay someone that dislikes me, just to read high school level rants on geocities-esque websites.. To this day, your site is choppy and not worth the frustration to scroll through. Comparing yourself to Glenn Greenwald is fucking ridiculous. Keep shilling about how great the vaccine is. Now, go get your fucking shine box hooknose.

    • Alexander Rich-Shea
      Alexander Rich-Shea
      September 23, 2021 at 3:22 pm

      I just shot a giant hot cock throbbing load of cum in my pants reading this nazi rant.

      • CalmWhiteDad
        September 23, 2021 at 3:47 pm

        Imagine if I didn’t self-censor…but the goblins are lurking around every corner ready to pounce and cry. 109 countries and they still won’t accept that just maybe the problem is them. I assume you are familiar with the Talmud and I don’t need to point you towards any of the many references in it describing their goal of completely removing Christian whites from the planet. But ya, the ones that own and control the media, banks and politicians are the victims.

        • Alexander Rich-Shea
          Alexander Rich-Shea
          September 23, 2021 at 8:09 pm

          Oh no, please, point me to the relevant Talmudic passages about this alleged Jewish jihad. I’ll take masechet and daf, if you please. If your citations are good maybe you can be my chevruta.

      • Get a room you two fudgepackers
        September 23, 2021 at 4:14 pm

        And leave the gerbils out of it, you know, as difficult that may be.

        • CalmWhiteDad
          September 23, 2021 at 4:30 pm

          Rabbi Shea hasn’t had his plate of foreskin this week so he’s a little amped up. The Devil is always hungry.

          • Alexander Rich-Shea
            Alexander Rich-Shea
            September 23, 2021 at 8:10 pm

            It’s Rabbi Rich-Shea

    • Nazi Hunter
      September 23, 2021 at 9:46 pm

      Losing your support is on par with winning power all.

    • Nazi Hunter
      September 23, 2021 at 9:50 pm

      Losing your support is on par with winning power ball.

  • Gino Plant from Quincy
    September 23, 2021 at 2:21 pm

    I read the article, hahaha Wow! Uncke Turtle claims to have “Millions” of monthly viewers!!! Now that’s quite a stretch! A very delusional, Trumpian over exaggeration of a crowd size haha… I mean cmon AK I love your blog, I really do! But “ millions” ???? I think you meant to write “ hundreds” but that’s ok, keep dreaming, haha.

    September 23, 2021 at 2:19 pm

    No way do I divert any money away from my Natzi doll collection, no way.

  • Death
    September 23, 2021 at 2:19 pm

    Why on earth would we want to pay to read about anything you write let alone read about your drama.
    Get it straight turtle man. I only come here to laugh at other people’s misfortune and blow off some steam. I will never pay to read your garbage blog that is full of repeat screen shots and grammar, spelling and factual issues.
    Sure you uncover some decent gossip, but at the end if the day it’s just that, gossip.
    And to all you whiney cunts that will down vote this comment go ahead. I’m not here for up or down votes. So you can kick turtle man’s crusty ball sack

    • Oh blow it out your ass
      September 23, 2021 at 2:47 pm

      You whiny little cunt.

      • Death
        September 23, 2021 at 3:57 pm

        That’s whiny little cunt with a fat wallet to you punk

  • Hu Fartted
    September 23, 2021 at 2:06 pm

    I never pay for content when there’s so much available for free. It’s simple economics.

  • Aidans Noose
    September 23, 2021 at 1:50 pm

    Do your wife and kids a favor and just get it over with already…..

    September 23, 2021 at 1:16 pm

    STOP MEETING MINERS OFF THEE INNERNET! Donate to my YouTube channel instead where you can watch me smoke weed and pretend I can beat up grown men. I’m seriously built like a 12 year old. Also, my sloth voiced GF will be starting an ONLYFANS soon. Details coming only after I get 2k in donos for my weed and Pepsi addiction.

  • Whiny Vag
    September 23, 2021 at 12:57 pm

    I’m not typing in my credit card number to your “club” because there aren’t enough blogs about masks. Not long ago there were what seemed like 5 or 6 stories per day, all telling the same EXACT story about mask outrage, mandates, etc, etc, blah, blah. Miss that.

  • randiguy2006
    Brilliant stuff
    September 23, 2021 at 12:56 pm

    Yeah keep being an insufferable prick and hating on your audience.

    Thats a guaranteed success strategy.

  • randiguy2006
    OK but....
    September 23, 2021 at 12:54 pm

    Yeah, but there’s a flaw in your logic.
    All those other place have decent content.

    You’re the whiny cunt. Get a real job if you don’t like it.

  • Asking For A Friend
    September 23, 2021 at 12:44 pm

    If we pay up. Do you include the jerk off video and a tour of the basement? Asking for a Friend.

  • Death
    September 23, 2021 at 12:33 pm

    He’s right, I have been kind of a whiny cunt lately.

    • Death
      September 23, 2021 at 4:01 pm

      What? Your wife’s whining I won’t luck her cunt? Sorry it smells funny.

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    September 23, 2021 at 12:29 pm

    I demand the Turtleboy provide Turtle Club memberships for free to all Afghanis, Haitians and Cherokees!

  • Lmaoooo
    September 23, 2021 at 12:23 pm

    The only whiny cunt here is the guy realizing his “labor” ain’t worth shit to most people.

  • TB Booster
    September 23, 2021 at 12:12 pm

    Wow, for only $10 a month I can watch you flail around trying to justify the premium charge??? I mean, I gotta admit the first two tries were bangers–Uncle Turtleboy Tries to Remember 11th Grade History, and Some Guy Is Mad I Wrote About Him–so maybe I will sign up.

  • nіgger slapper
    September 23, 2021 at 11:57 am

    Barstool Sports has Barstool Gold…

    Fox News has a premium option…

    Steven Crowder has mug club…

    Gerry Callahan has premium content you can pay for…

    Glenn Greenwald, Bari Weiss, and other Substack writers have free content along with bonus premium content….

    The Daily Wire lets you choose a different level of membership….

    HBO, ABC, etc, etc….

    Yeah lol… the only difference is they each have 100 million followers and long established brands. You write funny stories about fupasloths, cum dumpsters and junkies.

  • Whiny Dink Posts The Link
    September 23, 2021 at 11:46 am

    Why post the link when you swore you were going to not post the link?

    • Orion
      September 23, 2021 at 12:33 pm

      Because he thinks he’s making a point and rubbing our noses in it, but failing miserably. I wouldn’t pay a dime for access if my life depended on it at this point.

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