All-Star Criminals

Bubba Marx Arrested For Shooting In Monson Strip Club Parking Lot, Has Been Keeping It Real On Facebook With The Hoodbooger Checklist For Years


Last week the Monson Police Department posted on Facebook about a shooting that occurred at the Magic Lantern Strip club, and that the club was not cooperating with the investigation.

I feel like strippers have been the forgotten people of the pandemic. These are hard working single moms trying to put themselves through community college who make most of their money off lap dances. For years they were allowed to spread hepatitis and crabs, but then along came a virus with a 99.9% recovery rate and suddenly it was a health hazard to pay $200 to get a handy from the GED express in a backroom.

Anyway, the fact that the Magic Lantern isn’t cooperating about a shooting that occurred is the least surprising news ever. After all, this is the same place that hired legendary Springfield ratchet Princeza Aponte and put this sign up outside their business.


Chances are whoever was poppin off that night was a big spender and they can’t afford to lose a customer like that in a commie cold economy. Unfortunately for them the cops found out who it was on their own, and he looks exactly how you imagined he would.

WWLPA Ludlow man was arrested in connection with a shooting that took place at the Magic Lantern in Monson on February 21. According to the Monson Police Department, 25-year-old Ethan Fitzgerald was arrested near his home in Ludlow on Monday. Monson Police obtained a warrant for Fitzgerald’s arrest as a result of the investigation. He is facing the following charges:

  • Possession of ammunition without an FID/LTC
  • Discharging a firearm within 500 feet of a dwelling
  • Discharging a firearm within 150 feet of a highway
  • Disorderly conduct

Around 2:00 p.m. that Sunday, officers received information that there had been a shooting at the business around 1:00 a.m. from customers who were there when the shooting happened. A preliminary investigation determined that a series of shots were fired in the parking lot of the business. Officers recovered a number of spent bullet casings. No victims have come forward or have been identified. Fitzgerald was held on $100,000 bail pending his arraignment in the Palmer District Court. The Monson Police Department, Ludlow Police Department, Hampden County Special Response Team, Ware Police Department and the Massachusetts State Police Detective Unit all assisted with the arrest.

I don’t need to see or read anything about Bubba Marx here to know that he says the n word A LOT! You can tell just by looking at the overgrown asymmetrical pube farm he’s cultivating on his face.

A quick glance at his Facebook page shows that he checks all the ratchet boxes too. Copious amounts of Henny?


Openly selling shitty weed?


Hardo post dump bathroom pictures?


Gang signs and the flashing of upwards of $300 at a time in a vain attempt to show the world the enormity of his success?


Goes to county jail in Ludlow so often that he just refers to it as “The Low” and all of his friends instantly know what he’s referring to, and he’s growing out his neckbeard in an attempt to fit in with the Nation of Islam once he’s behind bars?


Pretending to shoot guns with the homies.


Gang signs with the homies, featuring middle fingers, jorts, RIP muh dawg t-shirts, Henny, and the official hat of hoodboogers everywhere?


RIP t-shirts for his homies wearing flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats?


Anyway, you know Bubba Marx is a true G because he’s the only guy who gets arrested for a shooting at a strip club in which apparently nobody got shot. He just wanted to send a message to all the gangstas in Ludlow that he has a gun and he knows how it functions. Now he’ll be telling war stories to his cellmates about that time he discharged an illegal firearm in an empty strip club parking lot on Route 20 and hoping that they let him convert to Islam so he can keep saying the n word without fear of retribution.


Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 


52 Comment(s)
  • Cleamus
    March 7, 2021 at 1:09 pm

    He should renounce his white citizenship
    Move directly to the hood
    Aspire to be a rap star
    Open up a barbershop
    And demand respiration’s

  • Sir Wilfred Death
    March 6, 2021 at 1:18 pm

    Forget this twerp. What has become of Princeza?

    Princeza was a choice piece of ass. I wonder how she’s holding up. Hottest chick ever seen on Turtleboy. A where is she now story would be interesting.


  • Dizio Gives Good Blumpkin
    March 5, 2021 at 7:28 pm

    Matt Dizio gave me a blumpkin in exchange for a footlong EYE-ITALIAN sub from Woburn House of Pizza. It was a good deal. I was very gassy and had Indian the night before.

  • Uncle Peckerhead
    March 4, 2021 at 4:22 pm

    If I can’t shoot my load inside, then I’m gonna damn well do it in the parking lot. I’m not gonna waste this fuckin viagra for nothin!!!!!!!!

  • Jose Maldonado
    March 4, 2021 at 12:47 pm

    He looks like he completed the Coca Cola training…

    • Gumercindo
      March 6, 2021 at 5:56 pm

      I though you were Jose Torres

  • kids a loser
    March 4, 2021 at 12:30 pm

    Gives great head in the low for protection

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Bret Killoran
    March 4, 2021 at 8:21 am

    Fuckin cash making home based fuckin job to earns more than $15k per fuckin month staying at fuckin home with your fuckin family. Previous fuckin month my online fuckin earnings was $17396 and I am doing this fuckin job just for 2 fuckin hrs a day on my fuckin laptop. Very fuckin simple and very fuckin easy work just like fuckin copy and paste things fuckin online. Fuckin everybody can get this and start making extra fuckin cash on fuckin line just by following the fuckin instructions on this fuckin website.

  • Crystal Laviolette
    Poor Ole Confused Low Baller with Nasty Ass Wiry AF Pubic Facial Hair or Something Like That
    March 4, 2021 at 1:36 am

    He seems to be very confused about his race, his gang, and that weird as fuck mousestache. Just to start. And his other facial hair looks nasty as fuck. All wiry, funky ass color, and all different lengths. Big ole nope right outta there! Girls ABSOLUTELY DO NOT find anything about this hot or attractive! So, he’s prolly firing of random shots cuz he’sa Virgin and ~really~ confused about a whole lotta things in his life. Imagine what he’s gonna look like at fifty!! Nevermind, please do not even think about that!!

  • Paul Casale
    March 4, 2021 at 1:09 am

    That scraggly looking thing on his chin takes over his whole face & body and makes him look shorter than he actually is.

  • DLFP
    March 3, 2021 at 9:29 pm

    Dude is short not even 5 ft

    • Crystal Laviolette
      “Low” Baller Like WHOA
      March 4, 2021 at 1:39 am

      Short with that Big Ass Scraggly Ass Beard All Different Lengths. There’s gotta be a better way!

  • Nap
    March 3, 2021 at 9:28 pm

    Is it the camera angle or does he look like a midget in that picture with his homies? I bet they keep a booster seat behind the bar at the titty joint so he can pull up to perve row after swapping his five for five ones.

    • Crystal Laviolette
      “Low” Baller Right Outta Here
      March 4, 2021 at 1:40 am

      Those poor, poor girls! Gross af.

  • TB into his own March Madness
    March 3, 2021 at 7:34 pm

    Aidan, just shut up, you are also a ratchet, and I can prove it:
    Lives off of others – check
    Has no real skills -check
    Likely got a visit from the DCF fairy – check
    Collecting from the government ” check
    Using drugs – likely, or should be on meds- so check
    Easily manipulated – check
    Wife left with kids because he thought he could pull a Tiger Woods – check
    Lives in mom’s basement – check
    Use whatever he can (i.e
    This blog) to yake it out on those he though did him wrong (i.e. teachers, fan, Trump supporters) – check
    Always looking for attention – check
    Has various gofundmes – check
    Hates the police – check (by my count he has directly said at least 4 police chiefs are corrupt, with no evidence, has made fun of at leat 7 police officer, including one because he died from COVID) – check
    Makes fun of other ratchets – check
    Allegedly was born again recently – check

    • Cookies in Bed
      March 4, 2021 at 7:04 am

      Is this jalihawa friend? Where’s the manifesto?

    • Fuck Up
      March 6, 2021 at 6:00 pm

      Hey TB into
      He has a website that provides you with a place to dump your shit
      Get your own

  • whatevuh
    March 3, 2021 at 6:23 pm

    best compliment you can give a girl from Monson?

    nice tooth

  • Welp...
    March 3, 2021 at 5:48 pm

    Apparently TB hasn’t killed himself yet. Will keep checking back. I know the situation is touch and go.

  • Captain Trips
    Gunnery Sergeant Hartman
    March 3, 2021 at 5:40 pm

    Only steer and queers come from Monson!

  • South Boston Driving School
    March 3, 2021 at 5:06 pm

    First Rule : don’t swerve for w!ggers or N1ggers

    • Dean Kapsalis
      March 4, 2021 at 1:03 am

      I didnt swerve

  • MC Spammer
    March 3, 2021 at 5:06 pm

    I’ll never understand why all these young white kids try to imitate and act like naggers

    Maybe it’s because he was birthed out of his mother’s anus, I don’t know

    I guarantee he wouldn’t last three minutes hanging with real naggers from the city, they’d steal his Henny, weed, and gay looking gear. Then they’d stomp him and take all his money.

  • Judge dread
    March 3, 2021 at 4:47 pm

    White ratchets that want to be muzzies are the worst. This guy is such a faggot, it would not surprise me if he went Syria/Libya/Iraq and fight for ISIS if he wasn’t in jail.

  • Mud Duck
    March 3, 2021 at 4:45 pm

    Monson? Wtf is that? Doubt there are any boons in that one horse town

  • Captain Trips
    Foghorn Leghorn
    March 3, 2021 at 4:45 pm

    I for one, am shocked that this wasn’t a baboon but a backwoods redneck wigger that did the shooting.

    Rare as, I say, rare as hens teeth son!

  • Tim Maynard
    March 3, 2021 at 4:26 pm

    shut your mouths nlggas

  • XavierParas
    March 3, 2021 at 3:47 pm

    Why do these wannabee thugs always take those faggoty, pouty-puss selfies?

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Old Tom Morris
    March 3, 2021 at 3:17 pm

    All hail, king of the ratchet chinstraps!

  • Dr Wu
    Dr Wu
    March 3, 2021 at 2:08 pm

    First of all, it’s not the “Magic Lantern”- it’s known as the Monson Ballet. It’s the kind of place where you wipe your feet on the way OUT.

    Secondly, this little shit for brains tough guy wannabe and his faggot friends are just they type to be tough guys only when there’s four or more of them. They usually start shit with six, but two are guaranteed to run away with vast amounts of turds filling their Fubu’s.

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      March 3, 2021 at 3:25 pm

      Katy lies, you can see it in her eyes.
      Can you hear me Doctor?

  • Let's imitate monkeys and pretend we're cool
    March 3, 2021 at 1:19 pm

    Of all the lifestyles or images a young white man can adopt, why choose imitating that of a baboon? What about 40s gangster? Rock star? International man of mystery? Beat writer with a pipe and sweater? Why imitate the knuckle dragging apes who live way left of the bell curve if IQ distribution? Why imitate sub-humans who can’t speak properly, afford belts, life off of government subsidies and rarely make it to see their 30th birthday? I don’t get it. It’s like if a billionaire told you he would buy you any car you wanted and you selected a 2008 Honda Civic. It just doesn’t make sense.

    Wiggers are literally the worst.

    • Silly wiggers
      March 3, 2021 at 2:50 pm

      Wiggers are in no man’s land in prison

      This clownshoe is going to be taking shaft left, right and centre

    • Luke Fondleberg (Deez/Doze)
      Luke Fondleberg (Deez/Doze)
      March 5, 2021 at 1:49 am

      I laughed audibly at the Honda Civic part.

  • Porch Goblin
    March 3, 2021 at 12:54 pm

    Turtleboy Gold!! These are the feel good Ratchet stories that keep the long timers coming back.The constant teacher-covid stories? Not so much..
    This one is an instant classic! BTW…Its March..Update on Ratchet Madness??

  • bigdaddy
    March 3, 2021 at 12:38 pm

    Cant the Chinese come up with a virus that only kills wiggers and ratchets ?

    • Here's the thing
      March 3, 2021 at 5:54 pm

      They did it’s called fentanyl. While it’s not exactly a virus it makes people who use it look like they have a few. Most end up with a few on the account they use it. It’s just not called the wuhan flu. It’s called the heposouras rex or my personal favorite “the monkey bug” aka aids aka the ninja aka the hiv.
      I could keep going but you get my point. The only things that came out of china that last more than a week is. Fireworks, batsoup flu and fentanyl.

    • SRR
      March 4, 2021 at 7:54 am

      The Democraps would Never pay Chinese Government to Create and Release a Virus that killed off their Voter Base.
      Only Ratchets, Morons, Minorities that lack Knowledge of History, the mentally ill and those with an IQ of 72 or lower Vote Democrat!
      Democrats Required a means of killing off those that are educated, intelligent, and Capable of Making an informed Decision on their Own Not the Sheeple that Follow Lies and Hypocrisy Fed to them by Media and Looney Left Liberals.

      • You might want to think about what you said a little bit more
        March 4, 2021 at 12:13 pm

        You sure about that?
        Have you seen the southern border lately and all of those poor unaccompanied minors that Biden is putting in literal concentration camps?
        Biden is literally like Hitler! Actually hes worse than Hitler. Hes a racist bigot nazi white supremacist who is literally putting poor unaccompanied migrant children into cages in concentration camps on the southern border. They are literally put into cages with no food or cloths. The beans are dripping down their legs and get this. They are not wearing masks and are spreading the Corona virus everywhere there are kids that are literally dying at our southern border. Biden is hiding behind his fence while eating jello pudding pops and kids are literally dying in cages down there.
        He. Is. Despicable. Nazi. Bigot. White. Supremacist. And. He. Needs. To. Be. Stopped.

  • “I Spy with my little eye “
    March 3, 2021 at 12:02 pm

    This dude clearly one of you going to get out jail declared yourself street at your Grandma’s house (crop out your grandma’s frame next time homie) how is it your only friend with shooting fingers looks 11 years old. Best yet is your photoshop “Street Posse” pic…your legs and arms are physically connected to your homeboys..unless there some type of penetration I am not aware of …dude crop your photoshop picture next time and get more than two followers homie

  • Spic Tormentor
    March 3, 2021 at 11:39 am

    The north American wigger is one of the most vile species on the planet. Right up there with spics and muslims

  • randiguy2006
    March 3, 2021 at 11:32 am

    Where the fuck is Monson?

    • Neo classical conservative
      March 3, 2021 at 1:56 pm

      It’s a hole in the wall cunt flap bordertown we’re you can watch the fentanyl shuffle on main St. 24 hours a day.

      And point of order unc, back room hamd jobs are 40+ 20 per song depending on how fast you finish. Me, im a minute man.

    • Turtz McGurtz
      March 3, 2021 at 2:25 pm

      No idea never heard of this town or the magic lantern.

      • Captain Trips
        Captain Trips
        March 3, 2021 at 5:39 pm

        You’re better off Turtz. Better off

  • Diego Knowz
    March 3, 2021 at 11:22 am

    Ethan Diego Fitzgerald.
    Prodigy of Joey Diego Fitzgerald from Springfield MA.

    It all makes sense now.

    If Ethan starts spending more and more time in the big house, he’ll find out that Gerald Fitz Ethan.

  • The Spic Tormentor
    Spic Tormentor
    March 3, 2021 at 11:11 am

    RIP my homie shirts are the best. That money could be used to go towards final expenses or a college fund for the dead junkies kid. But nah, lets make some 2xl t-shirts and bumper stickers to commemorate a dead piece of shit

    • Sp!c Tormentors real name is Matt Dizio from Woburn
      March 3, 2021 at 11:43 am

      I agree, thos shirts are retarded. Just think of all the “local pedophile” shirts you could have bought with that money.

    • Sp!c Tormentor is Matt Dizio from Woburn
      March 3, 2021 at 11:44 am

      • The Matt Dizio Supremacy
        March 3, 2021 at 6:10 pm

        It’s kind of lousy that people who went to school with him refuse to acknowledge his existence by not making eye contact with the poor bastard

        They feel his shame for him!

        Yep,lousy…but fucking hilarious

  • Osiris
    March 3, 2021 at 11:10 am

    Dude’s flashing mad cash…..while posing in his $17.99 two-flap velcro Jox.

  • piss flaps pelosi
    March 3, 2021 at 10:50 am


Comment on this Post


White Trash Hero Wears T-Shirt With His Mugshot On It From Last Time He Was Arrested At Latest Mugshot Photoshoot
Tsarnaev Sister Threatened Boyfriend’s Ex With A Bomb Because She’s A Muslim Terrorist And A Tsarnaev And This Is What They Do Best
Ladies Night At TBSports: Will Women Read Our Official Rankings Of NFL Teams Blog?