Smiles And Sunshine

Caramel The Kitten Reunited With Foster Family After We ID’d Chunky Brewster And Hairy Sandusky And Brought Them To Justice, Where The Haters At?

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Just another day at the officer for Turtleboy – Caramel the kitty cat has been returned, the bad guys we identified were in fact responsible (no word if they’ve been arrested for stealing the kitty), and we got a shoutout at the press conference:

This is what we do folks. We use our platform to reunite stolen kitties with their foster parents so they can live nice lives with nice people. Sure, if we had our page with 112,000 followers we probably would’ve found them even faster. Yes, Facebook and every person who tried to take that page WANTS kittens to remain stolen because they know our page will help reunite stolen kittens with their foster parents. But that does’t stop any of you from contacting us so we can keep exposing bad guys and making the world a better place.

This is what the mainstream media will not tell you about. This is the story they will ignore. The butthurts who whine about “hate speech” and bullying try to protect kitten thieves from being “publicly shamed.” Because that would be mean. They go to bat for the bad guys because they care about their feelings. We go to bat for innocent kittens and puppies.

Luckily for you all we don’t care about the feelings of ratchets. We’re not here to make friends, we’re here to make a difference. And today we all made a difference. We got the names of the bad guys from turtle riders who messaged the Turtleboy Sports Black Lives Matter page. Because they can take away as many Facebook pages as they want, but we’ll just keep making new ones. You can’t stop Turtleboy. It’s not a person, it’s a movement.

Oh, and Worcester Magazine, which has been spreading a fake news story about a washed up rapper suing us to get some cheap page views, was exposed as a fake news media outlet today:

A bunch of people messaged us about this but we had no comment. We knew the truth the whole time but just wanted to hear it from his mouth. “There’s no lawsuit.”

Once again, the Turtlegram, WoMag, and Masslive have spent the last week and a half “investigating” this fake news:

While we were out reuniting kittens and exposing cops who got arrested at the Ja Rule concert. Combine that with the app and the growth of our Facebook, IG, and Twitter presence, and you’ve got a productive little week for the turtle.

34 Comment(s)
  • Hugh Jass
    January 22, 2018 at 6:04 pm

    DeDe Delgado trumps TBS at every turn, it seems.

  • B.
    January 21, 2018 at 6:15 pm

    Nothing funny or witty to say. Thanks TB family for doing your homework and making things happen. Reporting. Action. Results. Yes, “only” a kitty but through your actions and blogging a positive result happened. The best. I am glad that TB Sports got a kudos from the director of the MSPCA. It was obvious and how important TB Sports played a major part in this affair to him and all of your readers.

  • Bostonstoolie4life
    January 21, 2018 at 10:58 am

    Hey turtle babies! It’s your resident Boston stoolie coming in! I k ow that you all are from that shithole town Worcester, Haverhill or another shitty town like those and worship Boston because you’re all losers! Anyway I just want to raise a question. Did the diddler who posted this(also the only person who works for this company) arrest these people? Nooooo! He didn’t do shit. you’re all dumb!

  • January 20, 2018 at 11:24 pm

    Just another long day at the officer? Which officer? Were you chasing the Dragon for some quid pro quo? I guess we already knew where and how you got your stories. Great job. You will do well against a punter like Mark Zuckerberg. You got this, little turtle. And I don’t even need knowing each act regarding notions evading yesterday’s indiscretions seeing all faces are going.

    • schizo
      January 21, 2018 at 4:07 am

      Retard ^^^^

      “And I don’t even need knowing each act regarding notions evading yesterday’s indiscretions seeing all faces are going.”

      • January 22, 2018 at 12:19 am

        read the first letter of each word of that though. good times. good luck with your lawsuits.

  • Caramel
    January 20, 2018 at 4:56 pm

    Meow what the weowing FUCK I liked the fat lady everything was purrrrrrfect til you fucked it up!

  • Burt Hurtensteiner
    January 20, 2018 at 3:29 pm

    Oh my God I laughed so hard my spleen fell out of my ear!!!

  • Talib Kweli
    January 20, 2018 at 2:49 pm

    I’m world famous!

  • Burt Hurtensteiner
    January 20, 2018 at 2:06 pm

    Three blogs dedicated to a kitten? Come on TBS. This is not what I am paying for (with my time).

    Quality over quantity, TBS. Quality over quantity.



  • Kelly Simpleson.
    January 20, 2018 at 1:39 pm

    Nice job fat shaming that pig TB. The only thing worse than a disgusting fat pig like her is a cat stealing disgusting fat pig!

  • pro trump
    January 20, 2018 at 11:42 am

    lol i fucken hate fatsos. thanks for fat shaming that dumpsterslut tb well done

  • catsup
    January 20, 2018 at 10:53 am

    uhm.. yeah, thing get weird fast when it comes to cats and women.

    • Jack Straw from Wichita
      Jack Straw from Wichita
      January 20, 2018 at 5:46 pm

      Looks like one of those old ladies marching in Northhampton.

  • Donda
    January 20, 2018 at 10:12 am

    Just a few short months ago, You unnecessarily tore apart the woman in charge of Odd Cat Sanctuary when a litter of cats being transported to their facility were stolen by a rogue driver.

  • Dorf Dorfman
    January 20, 2018 at 10:01 am

    Giving credit where it’s due, way to go TB.

    TB I hate you but I hate the people you write about even more, then again I hate everyone, especially that fat wretch DilDo Delgado… ha ha ha ha.

  • January 20, 2018 at 9:03 am

    I was called a very nasty name at Fenway Park! Unfortunately, nine of the 36,000 on hand actually heard it. So I have no witnesses.

    Go orioles!!!

  • Travis Rearick
    Travis Rearick
    January 20, 2018 at 8:47 am

    This was a much needed week for Turtleboy! You all didn’t deserve the bullshit you went through/are going through.

  • Vicxh
    January 20, 2018 at 7:29 am

    For me, turtleboy is all about pictures of these puss… I mean kittens. And the RILFs. Ratchets I’d like to Frost

    • love
      January 20, 2018 at 8:29 am


      and Chunky Brewster was a hilarious nickname, kudos for that to turtle

    • Urban Dictionary
      January 20, 2018 at 9:21 am

      RILFs are the guiltiest of guilty pleasures! Great new word, I hope to see it get picked up in the blog!

  • Vicxh
    January 20, 2018 at 7:26 am

    For me, turtleboy did well reporting on all these puss… I mean kittens.

  • Pet Detective
    January 20, 2018 at 7:00 am

    This is just the beginning. Let this be a warning to all those crazy cat ladies out there dressing their cuddly little companions in custom knit sweaters, it’s over!

    Turtleboy is going to track you down and have those creepy little carpet crawlers taken from you and put where they belong in a cage at a shelter where they can be happy.

    As we like to say, ‘No fleas on Turtleboy’.

    When I see those commercials on tv with dirty kittens in cages and for 39 cents a day I can save them I think to myself wow I could do that. Or maybe I might just snap like this dangerous outlaw did and stuff a suffering kitten in a bag and make a jail break. Shame on her for having compassion, let’s burn her on a stake!

    • Spock
      January 20, 2018 at 10:14 am

      You didn’t even make a logical argument with your supposition that somebody who steals a cat and stuffs a living animal into a bag would be a good owner of a cat. Logic would indicate the opposite, that such a person displays qualities that would disqualify them as a good pet owner.

    • mitch
      January 20, 2018 at 10:20 am

      is that what you think she had ? compassion ? really ? if she has so much “compassion” than why didn’t she legally adopt the kitten ? why was she at the animal shelter in the first place ? for someone calling themselves “pet detective” you would think that you have some deductive reasoning, but no…. just knee jerk liberal group think.
      oh btw… it’s burned at the stake you dolt.

    • Some Guy
      January 20, 2018 at 4:18 pm

      Actually, it is 19 cents per day. I get your point, I do. But there are costs that those shelters incur, it isn’t free. The fees they charge help them recoup some of that money. Given the costs of properly caring for an animal in your home, the fee they charge is very small in comparison. So yeah, she has compassion, but how about she pony up her share for the care they gave the cat that she took?

  • Sparkleface
    January 20, 2018 at 6:20 am

    This is why I love you guys.

  • yup
    January 20, 2018 at 1:14 am

    THANK YOU for continuing to target fat, worthless piles of trash. If you’re FAT, Turtleboy will GET YOU. Keep up the GOOD WORK!

    • fat fucks
      January 21, 2018 at 4:00 am

      Sooooo Faaaaaat

  • Haverhill Landlord
    Haverhill Landlord
    January 19, 2018 at 11:41 pm

    I hate ratchets, druggies, hood rats, low level criminals, welfare cheats and scumbags. I’m of the opinion that at least 80% of the human race is nothing but garbage wrapped in skin…but I’ve got two formerly stray cats and two formerly abused dogs living with me, because I love animals. Unlike the vast majority of the less-than-average homo sapiens featured on this site, animals are blameless and honest.

    Ya done good.

    P.S. If I ever find the person(s) who severely abused my dogs prior to my adopting them from a shelter, I’ll skin them alive.

  • ocs abound
    January 19, 2018 at 11:28 pm

    What is the status of the legal squabbles with Facebook? That is a true battle to protect justice against the real scum of the region and that occasional Nation level ratchetness.

  • Lou P
    Lou P
    January 19, 2018 at 9:44 pm

    Shelling out some ❤️ For the

    WE are TurtleBoy.

    Awesome … keep it alive.

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