All-Star Criminals

I Will Personally Send A Free Turtleboy Hoodie To The First Person To Correctly Identify These Two Cumdumpsters Wanted For Cashing $10,000 In Fraudulent Checks In Agawam

I Will Personally Send A Free Turtleboy Hoodie To The First Person To Correctly Identify These Two Cumdumpsters Wanted For Cashing $10,000 In Fraudulent Checks In Agawam

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Turtleriders – I know someone out there has to recognize at least one of these two skagmobiles wanted for cashing more than $10,000 worth of fraudulent checks in the Agawam/Easthampton area. Take a look, share this to all your friends, and the first person to slide in our DMs with a correct identification will get a free Turtleboy hoodie, on me. Pinkie swear.

Police say they may be driving around in a maroon Nissan with Connecticut plates.


Not only would you be doing the Agawam police a solid, you’d be doing me one as well, because I suspect these two are supremely ratchet in every sense of the word, and it would make my year exposing them.

16 Comment(s)
  • randiguy2006
    Randall Guy
    December 27, 2018 at 2:27 pm

    I dont get how banks cash fraudulent checks.

    My own bank makes my checks clear.


  • Turtlehead
    December 27, 2018 at 8:14 am

    For what it’s worth, I work for a bank. There is a loose gang going around called the Felony Lane Gang and they operate up and down the east coast. Corporate security sends us emails with their photos and a general ‘keep your eyes open’ for these people all the time. The gang itself hires mostly white women to go through the drive through and cash fraudulent checks against actual accounts. The people that hire them go to a meeting spot near the bank, collects their IDs and holds them until these people return with cash. They hire white women because they won’t arouse as much suspicion (yeah, it’s true so take your hippie liberal bleeding heart elsewhere) from the tellers. They’ve been doing this for years and they hit all the banks they can. I’ll be following curiously to see if these two are identified. If they are, maybe I’ll hire Turtleboy to solve this years old multi-state caper. I hope you’re successful!

    • A
      December 27, 2018 at 3:50 pm

      How does anyone cash a check or any transaction without an ID? They would have to be known customers to the bank and they would have to have sufficient funds to charge against the account in case of a rubber check, right?

      • Turtlehead
        December 27, 2018 at 4:44 pm

        Lets say Sally Jones is a customer of ABC Bank and usually goes to the Quincy branch. The Felony Lane gang burglarized Sally’s car and found her check book, credit cards and license in the center console a few weeks ago (This is the felony lane gang M.O. They burglarize the victim’s car and usually take some checks and her license. They will go to car after car until they find what they want) and laid low for a bit. The victim is generally a white woman. Then the Felony Lane Gang find a woman, late 20s early 30s and vaguely matches the DL picture and has “the disease”. The gang goes to ABC Bank in Dorchester, where Sally doesn’t normally bank but would make sense that she is a few towns over, and parks in adjacent parking lot. They scope out the bank for easy escape routes and so they can watch the people in the drive through complete the transaction and not take off on the gang. They will get wigs on and go through the drive up furthest from the building so the teller can’t really see her well enough to compare her to the stolen ID. They write out a check to cash and attempt to negotiate the check. The teller will process the check and give the woman the money. If there isn’t enough in the account they can ask for a balance and see what they can take or they just drive off. The actual victim won’t find out until she checks her balance or goes to withdraw cash.

        • A
          December 27, 2018 at 4:51 pm

          Thanks! I see what you are saying. I took it more like corporate checks were being used, not personal.

    • So Confused
      December 27, 2018 at 11:04 pm

      Who the hell are all these people that not only use checks but actually use them often enough to keep them in their cars???

      • Turtlehead
        December 28, 2018 at 3:36 pm

        Who are they? Tens of thousands of people, that’s who. I think it’s stupid too but people do it.

  • Fuh Kahoodie
    December 27, 2018 at 7:57 am

    Woooooooooooowwwwww a free hoodie? From you personally? That’s so awesome! I wish I could rat out the entire planet for a free Turtleboy hoodie. Who needs integrity when you have a hoodie?

    • Shut Up
      December 27, 2018 at 10:40 am

      If you’re covering for someone stealing tens of thousands of dollars, you have no integrity anyway, asshat.

  • Wwy
    December 27, 2018 at 12:39 am

    I’ll buy all the hoodies if Putin takes out Israel and brings gas chambers with him. Israel costs America 10 million a day you’re chasing small potatoes.

  • Mom's Basement
    December 26, 2018 at 11:22 pm

    I’ll bet that one pic is exactly what it would look like if some chick busted you looking at her through a peep hole

  • Exit 69
    December 26, 2018 at 9:42 pm

    Its the crack squad! Cashing those forged checks to give it to Diego. Can’t see the Brunette, but the Blonde still looks fuckable. As of now anyways, in a few months she will be crackwhore city..

  • z
    December 26, 2018 at 8:46 pm

    I hate it when the cops do this.

    Where in Agawam?
    When in Agawam? 1 week, 2 weeks, 2 years ago?

    It may jog someones memory if they were in that general area at a specific time.
    You have a video. You know the time it covers.
    If it is a bank, the bank has their head up their ass.
    A simple fucking camera registering the plates would seem like a simple thing to do.

    “We want your help. But we aren’t going to give you much to go on”.

    I imagine these 2 hit Agawam because if this is how they break cases there, these 2 will never be

    • 2wEntEe
      December 26, 2018 at 9:53 pm

      Jog someone’s memory????
      Either you know em or you don’t ya dumb fuck.

    • 2wEntEe
      December 26, 2018 at 9:56 pm

      If they got a big Mac on the 19th at 3pm then i know both of their full names and addresses.

      If not, then i have absolutely no idea who they could be.

  • DJ
    December 26, 2018 at 8:31 pm

    Oh no they must have the “disease”. Poor girls.. Fuck these scumbags!

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