All-Star Criminals

Meet Chuck Kneeland: Worcester Chode Nugget Who Robs Churches And Tip Jars At Local Small Businesses 

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There is no shortage of degenerates in Worcester:

First of all, I’ve lived in Worcester for a long time and I’ve never heard of this place. But from the looks of their Facebook page, it looks delicious.

Korean food mix and match. Hot.

Secondly, whoever wrote this Facebook post is being way too kind. This chode nugget doesn’t “look nice.” He looks like a Level 3 sex offender in the middle of an orgasm on a WRTA bus:

Even when he’s stealing directly out of the tip jar it looks like he’s giving a panhandler a rectal exam.

And of course he tried to be devious by pretending to look at the menu while stealing some hard working employee’s tips:

You gotta be a special kind of dick parade to pull a move like this. You’re not stealing from some big corporation. You’re stealing tips out of a jar at a small business on East Mountain Street.

He also looks remarkably like this guy from a Worcester Police Department post on December 1 who stole a TV from………

wait for it…..

wait for it…..

Yup, a church!!

He’s not even a normal ratchet robbing a Walmart or a Target. He’s going after Goddamn churches and tip jars!! Who’s up next in his robbery spree? The Salvation Army? March of Dimes? Jimmy Fund?

Worcester is basically one gigantic town where everyone knows each other, so there was a 0.0% chance people wouldn’t be screaming his name. And right on cue our inbox was flooded with the same name over and over again – Charles “Chuck” Kneeland:

According to his Facebook profile he is an “entrepreneur”

Which in Worcester means, “I’m a junkbox who robs churches and small businesses.” Another North High graduate GED going pro in something besides sports.

To the shock of no one he has a plethora of Google trophies in his closet, including awards for driving uninsured vehicles:


And of course countless arrests for his “disease”:


Sometimes he even defrauds the “doctors” who give him his “medication”:  

There is another Charles Kneeland who also lives in Worcester, and just so happens to be old enough to be his father (or potentially his grandfather if they grew up in Plumley Village). He’s got some Google trophies of his own. Nothing drug related tough, just the usual Worcester stuff like failing to register as a sex offender:

And attacking elderly family members with a knife:

The seed doesn’t fall far from the ratchet tree.

Notice the hoodie he’s wearing in the first post:

Worcester Youth Football. People don’t just randomly buy one of those at Marshalls. And from the look of his Facebook page he appears to have reproduced.

It’s totally not his fault though. It’s the “disease.” When you have the disease all you have to do is go on Facebook, talk about finding Jesus, ask people if they know about any “meetings” you can get a ride to, and brag about how you’ve been clean for all of 13 minutes. Then when your “disease” causes you to relapse make sure to post about that so everyone can tell you how strong you are and the one person who actually calls you out and tries to hold you accountable gets torn apart by enabling DCF Moms.

P.S. You mad Rasheedah?

8 Comment(s)
  • February 12, 2018 at 11:39 am

    OMG… that ending. Then her picture. That was funny!

  • Hugh Jass
    February 11, 2018 at 5:37 pm

    I hope none of you ever get afflicted with an addiction. It is terrible. Personally, I am on SSI disability due to my limited mental capacities, and my ADHD. But thank you all for supporting me and my passel of children. And for allowing me to buy the latest iPhone!!!

    • Jojo
      February 12, 2018 at 12:35 am

      Just say no! I like the Philippines solution to drugs, kill the dealers, kill the junk boxes. No strain on society, and the rest of us who have to function day to day and go to work and take care of our families don’t have to listen to the whining from bleeding hearts about safe injection sites, more tax dollars for rehab, needle exchanges, and so on. Imagine the federal government putting $60 million in tax payer funds aside for junky rehab only to listen to assholes say it’s not enough. No narcan, not even once! If natural selection doesn’t work, I vote Duterte as head of the DEA hit squad.

    • Rick Shaw
      Rick Shaw
      February 12, 2018 at 8:38 am

      You should also get a car, and a nice section 8 apartment in Newton or Wellesley. Also, please have a bunch of fuck trophies that taxpayers will be happy to pay for. If you should drive over anyone while high out of your mind, don’t worry.

  • Well, No Shit
    February 11, 2018 at 4:26 pm

    A few points, if I may…

    Fuck this thieving junkbox. Hopefully, he dies soon, so that his kid has a fighting chance of not being dragged down by this useless piece of shit. 

    Fuck opioid addicts in general. 99.9% of them are exactly like this shitbag; criminals, who couldn’t give less of a shit about anyone but themselves. They just don’t give a fuck who they hurt. 

    Fuck people calling drug use a “disease.” It’s not. It’s a choice. By calling it a disease, it lets these shitbags off the moral hook for their choices. Like they can’t help stealing tips and church donations, because they have a disease. Bullshit. They are scumbags, choosing to be bigger scumbags instead of changing their behavior. 

    Fuck Hazard Rasheeda. Clearly, that bitch, or someone close to her, has been featured in a TBS story. “Go about your life.” Fuck you, Hazard. Stop being trash, or hanging around trash, and maybe TBS won’t seem so intimidating to you. 

    • 2wEntEe
      February 11, 2018 at 4:46 pm

      Simmer down 2Pac

      • Well, No Shit
        February 11, 2018 at 4:51 pm

        Fuck 2Pac. 

        Fuck Biggie Smalls. 

        Fuck P. Diddy, too. 

  • Travis Rearick
    Eileen Ulick
    February 11, 2018 at 3:41 pm

    What a scumbag! And of course he has little mini future sex offender criminals running around wootown

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