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New Bedford Crotch Box And Punctuation-Free Posse Show Up On TBS Returns To Defend Her Good Name, Claims To Have Life Insurance Policy From Deceased Husband, Yet Was Begging Online For Stranger’s Money

New Bedford Crotch Box And Punctuation-Free Posse Show Up On TBS Returns To Defend Her Good Name, Claims To Have Life Insurance Policy From Deceased Husband, Yet Was Begging Online For Stranger’s Money




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It’s been a busy week for internet lawsuits here at Turtleboy Sports. Yesterday, I wrote this blog about a professional tenant with tittoos begging for money after she was forced out of her home by a severe case of the dreaded ghetto black mold. She wasn’t pleased with my assessment, and promptly messaged Abi, our dutiful desk girl, to let us know.


Abi, you sweet, gullible, sweaty sunfish. Always so helpful.

Oh, ok. Your tittoos are the names of your raw dog trophies – that sure does clear things up.


Oh no, her lawyer called her while she was talking to deskie at almost 6pm to give her the urgent news that the blog written about her being a shitty tenant and dishonest internet panhandler is so, totally, complete slander. AND harassment. She can’t afford her rent, but she can afford this dedicated man of the law!

Meanwhile, because private message aren’t ever enough, Nicky and a couple of New Bedford’s most refined, learned scholars showed up in the comments section to defend her honor in rambling flatbrimese sentagraphs:


I think we’ve really met our match with Amanda here. If this isn’t the face of a great tenant with a MENSA level IQ and the class and refinement of the British Royal Family, I don’t know what is. Definitely who I would chose to have in my corner during a battle of wits and words.


Nicky’s teacher also showed up to show off her skills with the English language and proficiency with caps lock:

But as our turtle riders quickly deduced, “teacher” was a bit of an overstatement.

Here’s a quick New Bedford english lesson: “Teacher” is to “teacher’s aide” as “Nurse” is to “CNA.”


Back in the inbox, Nicky just couldn’t stop lying to poor deskie:

Yeah, Nicky, about that “only $300 you owed”…. She is such a terrible liar, she caught her damn self midway through that one. D’oh!


No mediator you say?


Of course, deskie did her best to help, but…. you can’t please them all, right?

So we’ve established this chick is absofuckinglutely full of horseshit. And panic-deleted her Gofundme after being called out, so we’ve done some good in the world today – one less bullshit panhandling campaign. Which comes as no surprise that when someone called her bluff on the whole “poor me respectable widow” bit, this happened:



What a formidable foe I have here. I’m quaking in my boots. How will I ever match up against this level of intellect, integrity and grammar? I’m doomed!

8 Comment(s)
  • Mr. Mr.
    December 7, 2019 at 5:25 pm

    Fuck. This. Smelly. Cunt.

  • Mr. Blank
    April 25, 2019 at 6:36 pm

    Notorious liar. Her ex-fiance, not husband, was a pedophile and they cheated on each other more than they showed attention to their children. She tells so many lies, she doesn’t know what’s real. Not to mention, the ex overdosed watching her kid, who was laying in the bed with him. She manipulates and lies. Just another piece of trash taking up space. I’m very close to people that were close to her before. Guess why not anymore? I’ve been around her many times and believe me, you’re more ruined after it. Do not believe a fucking thing she says. She has no lawyer, she openly mocked her parents when they passed, and is just an evil little pig. But she’ll spread them legs for pocket change.

  • ElJefe72
    Anthony Weiner
    November 15, 2018 at 11:16 am

    Anyone have her phone number?  I have some photos I would like to send her. 

  • The Vorlon
    The Vorlon
    November 15, 2018 at 8:25 am

    They NEVER should have color coded the connectors for computers–without that, these ratchets would never figure out how to get on the internet.

    • marilu
      November 15, 2018 at 2:33 pm

      You mean besides on their iPhone 8’s & brand new Tablets? Section 8 ratchets live better than us working folk

  • Michael Avenatti
    November 14, 2018 at 11:34 pm

    I’d beat the crap out of her

    • Don Lemon
      November 15, 2018 at 12:42 pm

      I’d record it and upload it to Worldstar ‘cuz you my favorite honkey.

  • Dr. Ford
    November 14, 2018 at 11:03 pm

    I believe her. She’s close enough to a woman.

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