Jack Kanoff On Bad Commeters

New Hampshire Etch-A-Stench Calls Turtleboy A Sex Predator For Calling Out Crisco Crevice Vaping Store Degenerate, Forgets She Did The Same Thing In March 


Yesterday I published a blog about this Andover Crisco Crevice who was accused by multiple former employees at his “vape shop” (which illegally was used to sell marijuana without a license) of not paying them. He told one of the dudes that being paid was conditional upon taking down posts about not being paid. Because that’s a thing you can do.

While he owed these guys money he was spending money left and right on his now ex-girlfriend, and saw nothing wrong with it because he’s a piece of shit.

Pretty standard Turtleboy douchebag shaming of someone who clearly deserved to be called out.

Well, apparently one this walking etch-a-sketch wasn’t a fan.

She came in hot with the usual made up stuff about Uncle Turtleboy being a sexual predator who got fired, and blah, blah, blah.

If your defense of a friend who was publicly shamed on Turtleboy is to attack the source with baseless nonsense, then you don’t really have a defense. You’re just as big of a ratchet as they are.

But here’s the best part – she actually called out the Crisco Crevice on the very same post that was featured in the blog.

You can’t make this stuff up people. In March she urged the guy who had gotten bad checks and hadn’t been paid to make his post public for the purposes of humiliating the Andover Crico Crevice. We ended up seeing this post and blogging about it. Now here she is in November defending his honor. Can’t make this stuff up.

But wait – she had receipts! Take a wild guess which links she started posting….

Turtleboy Sporks!! Sounds legit girl! A free anonymous WordPress website made four years ago that hasn’t been updated, has no references our sourcing, and seems to be the ramblings of a butthurt ratchet who was likely featured on Turtleboy themselves.

She had more.

The Herald News article about Jennifer Panagakos suing Uncle Turtleboy because her millionaire husband doesn’t like to see people criticize his wife, who is 30 years his junior. She even quoted the baseless allegation that Unc is conspiring with a competing yoga instructor he’s never met or spoken to.

She also quoted a new one I’ve never seen – “Itsgoingdown.org.” Never seen this one before.

But it looks like some SJWs decorated the Turtleboy statue in Worcester, and they think Turtleboy is a racist because we’ve called out people of all colors and nationalities for being con-artists and criminals. This woman should be paid top dollar for her research skills.

For the record, we were too kind to the Crisco Crevice. He’s actually a much bigger piece of shit than first realized. Here’s a text message he sent an ex-girlfriend who was pregnant, bragging about how his fat ass is sexy and only “fucks dimes,” and making fun of her for being fat (while pregnant).

Here he is blaming another ex-girlfriend for making him go apeshit.

Because it’s a woman’s fault that he can’t control himself.

He likes to whine about how nobody understands him, and sends pictures of empty beer bottles so women will feel bad for the fact that he’s drinking away his self imposed depression.

He looked for more pity by vowing to drive drunk and crash into a tree.

And finally he started sending pictures of an arsenal of guns.

Definitely the kind of guy you want to come on Turtleboy to defend. Always ends well.



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35 Comment(s)
  • LiveFreeorDie
    January 2, 2020 at 7:44 am

    Here’s the dealio guys. The fat goon paid this skank in Xanax bars and adderall. Want more info? Check the FB comments. Ex employees, ex boyfriends, ex friends, they lay it all out. She’s so jam-boozled, when she goes to defend her dope man, she forgets she bashed him awhile back. Drugs will do that to you. Fat goon name calling the ladies and trying to look like a stud with all those assault rifles… that’s just a side effect of low self esteem from morbid obesity. If I were this fat, vile, useless sack of shit, I’d probably drive drunk too hoping the big man upstairs would call my card. I can’t wait to read the next piece that’s coming on these fools! I heard it won’t disappoint in all it’s ratchet-ness glory.

  • Slapabitch
    December 5, 2019 at 6:59 pm

    That Ho claims she was raped too!! What a LIAR!!.. Literally just weeks later she was in another relationship happy as can be..Not the norm behavior for someone who’s been raped. She’s a psycho Bitch who needs to be brought down.. She always has different guys on the hook at the same time always looking for an angle to lie, screw them & steal their shit, while wrecking their lives. She’s a druggie & so pathetic I can’t believe she’s still walking the streets. Lies roll off her tongue so easily but most people see her for what she is. A manipulative piece of trash that needs to be put in jail. Anyone that finds that broken train wreck attractive needs their eyes examined. She spins some great tales tho.. But when you start asking questions too close to home she disappears.. Google her.. She has quite the history. If you sleep with her get tested!! If you have pain killers in the house count them.. She loves snorting pills!

  • You know it's true
    November 6, 2019 at 11:45 pm

    Heather would look good all bound up in leather.
    She’d be squealin’ while I’m wheelin’ and dealin”.

  • Someone send heather some harvoni
    November 6, 2019 at 8:53 pm

    She’s got that meth scratched face. If not she absolutely has hepatitis. Probably smells like wet garbage too. I saw that post she made. That girl is tow up crazy! She’s not just missing a few screws the whole damn toolbox.

  • All the real alcoholics like...
    November 6, 2019 at 11:32 am

    Food blister drinks 8 Sam Adams Pumpkin Spices and thinks he’s going on a death bender? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

  • Stunt Penis
    November 6, 2019 at 7:20 am

    Sad thing is Heather is a pretty girl… if she didn’t defile her body with dirty tats, she could have leveraged her good looks and her hot little body to land a decent guy and have a meaningful, productive life.

    Now she’ll just be a cum dumpster for low lifes and her life will amount to nothing.

    • Startled Pancake
      November 6, 2019 at 7:01 pm

      Someone has to take massive blown loads to the face.

      Might as well be her.

  • Purpleheart1
    November 6, 2019 at 6:54 am

    So after a few Blue Moons, (lol!) he threatens to go drive drunk, buy more, and wrap his car around a tree. Notice when the concerned female says she’s going to call the police to ensure he is safe, he answers all of the sudden saying he fell asleep in his car. What a coincidence! What a manipulative piece of shit!

    Then, there are two other women who he’s harassed and sent abusive texts to. I’d be willing to bet there’s a boat load more screenshots of from those ladies and there’s probably even more women out there he’s terrorized as well.

  • Stew ped falk tarred
    November 6, 2019 at 1:01 am

    It’s not very smart to publish pics of your supposed arsenal.
    Two possible bad things could happen.
    1. Someone is looking at your shit like a shopping list.
    2. Some alphabet agency type is looking at your shit like a shopping list.
    Either scenario could result in you getting your fatfuck body perforated as they come to take your shit..
    The only difference in one does it and they risk conviction, the other gets a commendation.

  • Turd Reversalist
    November 6, 2019 at 12:24 am

    Tell ya what, that girl is a prime candidate for a mushroom missile’s journey to the center of the stinkstar.
    This would all be conducted in a professional manner, of course.

  • Heather’s imaginary child
    November 6, 2019 at 12:23 am

    Anyone else see the comment on that thread where she said her kid died awhile ago from cancer? Lies!!! Just like the one she claimed she’s married to a marine. This girl has more than a few screws loose.

    • Count snatchula
      November 6, 2019 at 11:26 pm

      I have a friend that used to be friends with this chick. She told me this girl is NOT married and goes thru men as quickly as she goes thru jobs. No lie always in a new relationship and starting a new job constantly. He’s always her world. She’s super fake and phony. No wonder why she came to the defense of this degenerate piece of shit. What a stupid bitch.

    November 5, 2019 at 8:29 pm



  • hartf811
    Fat guy fantasy
    November 5, 2019 at 6:13 pm

    I’ll bet I can make a wonderful wife and mother out of her!

  • Purpleheart1
    November 5, 2019 at 4:27 pm

    Is the insurance company that employs him aware of his suicidal drunken joy ride? I think that may be a conflict of interest working for an insurance agency….

  • Meeeeaaaaahhhhh
    November 5, 2019 at 4:15 pm


  • Two Patch Crappy Jack
    November 5, 2019 at 3:58 pm

    I hope the tree survives if you really crashes into, it. it’s a shame to lose a good tree over piece of shit like this

  • Cheddah
    November 5, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    This kid brags about fucking dimes but I bet he can’t see his own hard-on standing up or sitting down. IF his blood cells are even healthy to produce one…

  • anonymous Dick Hertz
    November 5, 2019 at 2:32 pm

    I think i saw her in gloryhole porn

  • Dam It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
    November 5, 2019 at 2:23 pm

    Maybe all the money spent on tats should have been spent on tits.

  • Heather
    November 5, 2019 at 2:16 pm

    My jaw hurts from earning all those tattoos and my knees are wobblty to.

  • Cablguy
    November 5, 2019 at 1:50 pm

    He’s talking suicide shouldn’t the cops go take the guns

  • Looks like Teen Mom Kailyn Lowry
    November 5, 2019 at 1:48 pm

    She reminds me of that ratchet Kailyn in Teen Mom with the ugly tats over her whole body. Why do they think this looks appealing?

  • ncfoothillbilly
    November 5, 2019 at 1:22 pm

    Well, look at her with her low self-esteem tats.
    itsgoingdown.org is anqueefas website
    How many of those ARs are stolen?

  • Judge dread
    November 5, 2019 at 1:19 pm

    She is skinny for a reason….

    pin hole eyes. she has that disease that is going around.

  • judge dread
    November 5, 2019 at 12:53 pm

    congratulations about how you’re going to get raided by the police with all those gun photos.

    I hope they beat the fucking shit out of you and take all your guns.

  • Eat, Fat Boy, Eat !!
    November 5, 2019 at 12:48 pm

    I’ve seen me a whole mess o’ fat boys in my day, but this fat boy is the fattiest !! I can’t help but wonder what the room smells and sounds like when fatty and skinny-skank attempt to have “relations” !!
    GROSS !!!!!

  • DudeRanchStripClub
    November 5, 2019 at 12:41 pm

    This dude is a product of Julia Childs style cooking.

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    November 5, 2019 at 12:18 pm

    I’m with Heather on this one. The Turtleboy needs to be stopped!

  • Bitch Tits
    November 5, 2019 at 12:17 pm

    “Turtle fuck” how creative, I wonder how long it took her to think of that zinger.

    • JJ@AOL.COM
      November 5, 2019 at 6:22 pm

      Josh is that you?

  • Common sense
    November 5, 2019 at 12:15 pm

    I would think that text stream regarding killing himself and the pictures of all the guns would be a opportunity for a little police intervention. Shitheads like this shouldn’t have access to multiple rifles.

  • I’m not saying it was aliens
    November 5, 2019 at 12:07 pm

    That’s a man, baby. Tiny hips and broad shoulders.

  • Spic Tormentor
    November 5, 2019 at 11:50 am

    That inked up whore would make a good punching bag.

    Too bad fat boy doesn’t actually have the balls to kill himself. Lucky for us he’s due for a heart attack real soon and that should do the trick.

  • randiguy2006
    Say what now?
    November 5, 2019 at 11:48 am


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