All-Star Criminals

Pawtucket Homewreckin’ FupaHoe Totals A Cop Car With Stolen Vehicle, Assaults Two Officers, Already Has A Criminal Record Of Shoving Grandmas

Pawtucket Homewreckin’ FupaHoe Totals A Cop Car With Stolen Vehicle, Assaults Two Officers, Already Has A Criminal Record Of Shoving Grandmas

Want to have your business advert viewed over 2 million times per month? Email us at for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM





WPRIPAWTUCKET, R.I. (WPRI) — The person whom police say was behind the wheel of a stolen car that hit a cruiser head-on has been arrested. Pawtucket police said they took 32-year-old Amanda Lasater into custody Tuesday. She was arraigned Wednesday morning on several charges, including assault of a police officer and leaving the scene of a crash. Police said Lasater was driving a stolen car that officers attempted to stop on Broad Street early Friday morning. According to police, the driver rammed the front of a cruiser and sped off, leaving behind a passenger. Police said they arrested the passenger, Daniel Taylor, when he tried to run from the scene. Pawtucket police said the officer in the cruiser was not seriously hurt.










So these two totally employed citizens were making their parents proud at 4:30am joyriding in a stolen Prius. While I applaud their environmentally conscious theft, they still tried to flee from the police and instead of complying like normal adults, rammed the front of a cop car and probably totaled it. The good news is that the officer is going to be fine and both ass scabs were caught.

Amanda is a highly functioning member of society with an enormous arrest record. This psychofupa has NINE warrants. If you have nine warrants you need to think about doing something else with your life, unless you really like dirty prison lady taco.

It’s all shoplifting and driving on a suspended license then, even though she’s been caught basically every time, she graduates to robbery and then robbery with a side of elderly assault. What the fuck were you trying to steal? Some old lady’s costume jewelry?

So this put her away for 5 years and she came out living her best life riding a unicorn into the sunset. I’m just kidding. She actually just stole some woman’s husband, got some sweet neck tats (those make you MORE employable), and went full sewer rat.

This was one of the first few Google results. Apparently there’s a site called This is fascinating and who knows if this shit if correct, it is at least hilarious. Supposedly AmandaPanda can’t keep her paws off someone else’s bamboo stick.

This is why I frequently let my husband know I would cut off his dick, with a butterknife, if he puts his trouser snake in someone else’s cock holster. Really though, if all that is true it’s freaking sad, but the husband is also a spineless ratchet magnet.

Anyways, back to how wildly attractive and educated homewreckin’ Mandy is.

On fire is right! Guuurl you are burning up!

Nothing says “I want a job and definitely don’t live off government assistance” more than a neck tattoo.

Doesn’t it look like it says HOE? I can tell you what it does look like. It looks like it was tattooed by a drunk T-Rex with his itty bitty T-Rex arms. Apparently it says MOE. Now maybe some of you know what MOE stands for, but I was fucking clueless until I trolled the below post. Money Over Everything. GENIUS, Mandy Pandy, GENIUS!

I think Rhode Island Turtle Sista just found her motto.

I love that one because the grammar is SO BAD Google is trying to translate Trinity Sherman’s nonsense. I don’t know why they aren’t more concerned, it reads like he was having a stroke.

More hood speak my non-ghettofabulous upbringing didn’t afford me a lesson in.

Anyone over the age of 0 who uses FRFR can’t be taken seriously.

I’m sure this is just a obstacle on the course to turning her life around. As is tradition.



We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

Screen Shot 2017-03-31 at 2.17.19 PM


Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

Screen Shot 2017-02-27 at 10.14.48 AM

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

Screen Shot 2017-03-25 at 8.48.23 PM


11 Comment(s)
  • Wabbitt
    June 10, 2017 at 4:48 pm

    These ratchet ass idiots are who we need to turn into soylent green – not the homeless. Society would experience a fucking renaissance.

  • Big Raymond
    June 9, 2017 at 6:32 pm

    Rhode Island, Ginger. No further questions your honor.

    Rhode Islanders can’t drive to save their lives.

    • Wabbitt
      June 10, 2017 at 4:49 pm

      Connecticut drivers are worse.

  • Sonny's Mom
    June 9, 2017 at 4:57 pm

    Time was, when being poor meant “working hard to survive”, not “social parasite”…

  • White Nationalist Turtle Rider
    June 8, 2017 at 7:59 pm

    Trash slut should be smeared with bowel movement and thrown in a dumpster!

  • Diane Woods emerson
    June 8, 2017 at 7:13 pm

    I love when I am in a quiet office reading TBS and I burst out laughing and literally can’t stop. I have to stop reading or look crazy. ” Why wasn’t anyone concerned , it read like he was having a stroke. “Lmao!!! Every time I think about that I crack up.

  • SemenTrebuchet
    June 8, 2017 at 6:27 pm

    first thing i said was “is that HOE she has written across her neck?”

  • Mack
    June 8, 2017 at 5:51 pm

    That neck ink is gross and will scare kids

  • Ghandi
    June 8, 2017 at 5:20 pm

    There are many people living today that shouldn’t be. What a skank.

  • Chip Striker
    June 8, 2017 at 12:47 pm

    Whenever there’s a gross white with neck tats and a criminal record a brother with a criminal record is not far behind. Usually a pit bull is in the picture as well if it’s not already at the local shelter.

    What you won’t see at all in these matters is a place of employment.

    • Turd Burglestein
      June 8, 2017 at 3:02 pm

      Except for the occasional tittie bar.

Comment on this Post


White Trash Hero Wears T-Shirt With His Mugshot On It From Last Time He Was Arrested At Latest Mugshot Photoshoot
Tsarnaev Sister Threatened Boyfriend’s Ex With A Bomb Because She’s A Muslim Terrorist And A Tsarnaev And This Is What They Do Best
Ladies Night At TBSports: Will Women Read Our Official Rankings Of NFL Teams Blog?