To this day I still believe that the PURR Cat Cafe saga I covered two years ago this week was the biggest dumpster fire I’ve ever covered. I won’t rehash the whole thing, but I will urge you to catch up by reading PART ONE, PART TWO, PART THREE, and PART FOUR. Long story short, crazy box wine lady opens up cat cafe in Brighton, forgets to get cats, beds, or anything else cats need, steals pictures of cats from Google and posts them on her business page, starts a GoFundMe to fund the entire business, doesn’t have anything remotely resembling a business plan, tells organization donating the cats to fuck off after blowing donated money on superfluous bullshit, threatens multiple people using her business Facebook page while pretending so speak as a cat, pretends that the cats refer to her as “The Crazy Hooman,” calls good advice “bullying,” holds multiple open houses that she doesn’t show up for, tries to get an employees to illegally solicit the MSPCA for free cats while pretending to be a rescue, slut shames her former GM Kathleen who she never paid $2K using PURR’s business page, pretended all her employees who quit were still working there, tried to fix the bad public PR by holding a book night hosted by an anti-semite, and famously gave us the most infamous line in Turtleboy history:

WE HAVE NO CATS KATHLEEN!!!

Well that was a wild ride.

I need to smoke a joint.

Alright, I’m back.

Miraculously PURR Cat Cafe actually opened.

Then two months later Diane was back on Turtleboy after she was found passed the fuck out in PURR’s bathroom by the Boston Police, and it was reported that some cats (which she somehow acquired) might have run away.

The victim (Kelly) was able to state that she “drank a lot today, probably a gallon of wine.” Officers asked when she last stopped drinking to which she replied, “I never stopped.” Officers observed multiple empty bottles of wine on the floor also with an open bottle of Cat Medication (Amprolium). It should be noted the only items located in the exit foyer area were the victim’s purse, bottles of wine, the cat medication, and a broom. The victim refused to answer any questions as to why the cat medication was located next to the bottles of wine. 

Yet somehow PURR Cat Cafe survived.

Until last month.

“My understanding is that the cafe is now closed,” said a trustee of NTABOS, the realty trust listed on the sign on Purr’s door, who did not want to be identified by name. From Boston Municipal Court records, it appears that Peter Davos of NTABOS sued Purr’s owner, Diane Kelly, for failing to pay rent. The judge ruled in Davos’ favor, and an execution for possession of commercial property was issued on October 4.

Diane Kelly forgot to pay her bills? Ya don’t say. It’s not like she has a long and documented history of being a human shitstorm with the organizational skills of Dennis the Menace.

Yet despite knowing that she was going to be permanently closing Diane tried one more time for a cash grab with a silent auction to raise money for a business that she knew would not be there any longer.

And yes, she did use the phrase “Boston Strong” as a marketing ploy to con people out of money. Because at this point she might as well take a steamy dump on people affected by that tragedy on her way out. What does she have to lose?

Then it looks like they had a sale on Franzia at Wegmans because next thing you know the cats had taken over PURR’s Facebook page once again.

It was complete with all the shenanigans from two years ago – hilarious misspellings (crusifiction sounds like a section of the library on a Carnival cruise ship), completely unprofessional calling out of customers by name, praise for Diane from her cats, and of course…

Meow. Meow. Purr.

And guess who still hasn’t gotten paid?

Pray for Kathleen. Even though she blocked me and did an interview with everyone but Turtleboy.

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