All-Star Criminals

They Caught One Of The Queef Cakes Who Jumped The Guy Defending His Girlfriend On The Red Line And We Were All Wrong About What Town He’s From, Let’s Find The Other 3

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Last week we published this blog after the MBTA police announced they were looking for three shitbags and their pass around Thicky Minaj, because they beat the shit out of a dude when he asked them to stop harassing his girlfriend.

 

We polled turtle riders to guess where they were from….

and you all chose…….

Because they might as well have had QUINCY tattooed on their foreheads.

Well, they caught one of them and it turns out the correct answer was, “other.”

On June 1, 2018 we displayed several photographs of person’s of interest relative to an Assault & Battery with serious bodily injury investigation. (Please see posting here) As a direct result of numerous tips from members of our MBTA community on Friday June 8, 2018 Kerrick Pierce, 23, of Pembroke was placed into custody by Transit Police detectives for Assault & Battery resulting in serious bodily injury.

Oh, fuck me silly. Of course he lives in my freaking town. You move to Pembroke specifically to get away from this. If I wanted to live amongst these grundle barnicles you could cash me in Plymouth or Weymouth or Wareham. But hoodrats can drive now, so pretty much nowhere is safe. Wait until the Nantucket ferry starts accepting food stamps. Then we’re all fucked.

Kerrick Pierce appears to be this one:

According to Henry Hardo’s Facebook page, “California wasn’t ready” for him and his homoerotic bro-queefs, and he proudly stated that he was not arrested, “this time”:

Saturdays are for the boys!

Obviously captain noodle dick isn’t afraid to cause a little ruckus. This is the face of every 22 year old hardo who still thinks women are impressed by his ability to shotgun a Keystone a light, get touched up with a chinstrap, and brag about how in and his boys totally kicked that dude’s ass. That’s what he gets for asking them to stop harassing his girl yo!!

But the other three have not been found. Although this is one of the shirtless boy toys from his profile picture:

Hmmm….Not saying that’s him, since all these pubeatrons basically look the same. But I’m not saying it’s not him either. If you’ve got some time and you’re a Turtleboy detective protege, his friend’s list is wide open too. Just sayin.

I’m kind of sad and embarrassed that we couldn’t get their names by now. I know we don’t have the Facebook page turtle riders, but that’s no excuse to stop sharing and spreading the word of the turtle. We would’ve got them in five seconds last summer. We’re a team, and together we can make the south shore great again. One asshole at a time. Don’t let Facebook stop us from making the world a better place. If you know who they are, feel free to email us at [email protected], message one of our Facebook pages, or hit us on on Twitter @TurtleboyNews. If you know who Kerrick Pierce is, then chances are you’ve got a good idea about who the other three are.

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