All-Star Criminals

Ware Mugshot Matching Game Round 2 – Match The Slugpump To The Crime They Committed And Win Free Turtleboy Joy   



After seeing a drug arrest posted on the Ware Police Department’s Facebook page this morning I was inspired to bring back the Ware Mugshot Matching Game. For those of you unfamiliar with Ware, it was ranked as the 4th biggest dump in Massachusetts in a Turtleboy study conducted in 2015. Ware is a shithole on Route 9 between Amherst and Worcester that has become a haven for recently paroled sex offenders, junkboxes, and anyone who enjoys living in a trailer. I have no idea how or why all these crotch critters chose to live in one small but concentrated community together, but their police department’s Facebook page is easily the most entertaining one to follow in Massachusetts.

Here’s how the game works. I post mugshots of recently arrested Ware crotch rockets, and you have to match them to the crime they committed? Here are our contestants.

























Now match them up with their crimes committed and see how many you can get right. This is a harder version of the game since most of the arrests this time around involve crack monkeys selling different kinds of drugs.

1. B&E in the Daytime for a Felony, Wanton Destruction of Property, Larceny over $1200, and Larceny of a Firearm

2. Literally biting someone’s ear off

3. Reckless Endangerment of a Child, selling Kpins and heroin around a child

4. Selling adderrall, crack cocaine, and heroin

5. Selling regular cocaine, Heroin, miscellaneous pills, and other drug paraphernalia

6. selling prescription medications, crack cocaine

7. selling  Crystal Meth, MDMA (ecstasy), Crack Cocaine, Suboxone



Here’s your correct answers.

A – 3. Juan Luis Casiano-Rentas – Reckless Endangerment of a Child, selling Kpins and heroin around a child



B – . Greg Normand and Censior Rodriguez – B&E in the Daytime for a Felony, Wanton Destruction of Property, Larceny over $1200, and Larceny of a Firearm.



C – 6. Kristen Dubuque, Robert Guelff, Stephen Robert, Heather Wheeler – selling prescription medications, crack cocaine





D – 7. Sara Herlihy, Tina Bellis, Melanie Fotiathis, Jack Coburn, Aaron Gasque, Melanie Fotiathis – selling  Crystal Meth, MDMA (ecstasy), Crack Cocaine, Suboxone



E – 4. Tara Byrd, Michael Martino, Amber Cornelius, Albert Laviolette – Selling adderrall, crack cocaine, and heroin



F – 2. Alan Mosher – Literally biting someone’s ear off


G – 5. Fermin Diaz, Katie Young – Cocaine, Heroin, miscellaneous pills, and other drug paraphernalia

F was the easiest one. That dude is hangry for ears. You can tell just by looking at him.

I have no idea why all these people chose to live in one relatively small town in the middle of nowhere, but Ware really is where dreams go to die.



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28 Comment(s)
  • Tony, you are a true POS
    November 23, 2019 at 2:02 am

    I only know one guy from Ware and he is a backstabbing, shit stirring POS. Rides a bike but not a biker. More like a motorcycle enthusiast with an extreme integrity problem. Last I saw, he was riding with an unsuspecting group of people who are probably at each others’ throats by now, thanks to him.
    He’s old enough that I might be speaking ill of the dead. Fuck him, whether he’s still stealing oxygen or not.

  • Sharkgirl
    November 22, 2019 at 8:30 pm

    F! He def on the search fir ears

  • Think about it this way
    November 22, 2019 at 11:14 am

    Good to place to score drugs, Ware has that going for it.

  • AnonJack
    November 22, 2019 at 9:20 am

    C and G (Katie) have been mentioned in TB blogs before. I went to HS with them and it’s great to read the train wreck.

  • Your mom
    November 21, 2019 at 10:16 pm

    If you think Ware is “a haven for recently paroled sex offenders, junkboxes, and anyone who enjoys living in a trailer”, you need to check out Warren!

  • No Ware
    November 21, 2019 at 5:55 pm

    Ahhhhh…Ware, Massachusetts. Where every night is a party.

  • I'll get my coat
    November 21, 2019 at 3:05 pm

  • The Smoking Gun
    November 21, 2019 at 3:01 pm

    Taking a page out of “The Smoking Gun”? (Time Waster)?

  • whitey
    November 21, 2019 at 2:30 pm

    A= One eye Willy

  • Captain Trips
    November 21, 2019 at 2:28 pm

    Alan Mosher

    Should be named Alan NOSHER, with an appetite for ears!

  • Captain Trips
    November 21, 2019 at 2:27 pm

    Albert Laviolette has been busted about 1500 times. Keep letting him out!

  • Stinky the Finger
    November 21, 2019 at 2:18 pm

    A. Ordering the Tate-LaBianca murders.
    C. Identity theft (Keanu Reeves).
    D(2). Conspiring to kill citizens of the United States as part of the September 11 attacks.  
    E. Being undead and consuming live human brains.

  • Lee Ho
    November 21, 2019 at 2:06 pm

    Looks like all their pictures were taken after the Meth lab blew up.

    No steamed rice for them, only eternal damnation.

    • Ho Li Phuk
      November 21, 2019 at 6:47 pm

      They look like poo poo platter, right Lee?

  • Judge dread
    November 21, 2019 at 2:02 pm

    I like how the individual is selling crack and meth. Like what get boost up with some rock cuz u can’t wait 2 minutes to get super high on all that meth u just snorted?

    Fucking junkies.

  • Y
    November 21, 2019 at 1:19 pm

    D looks like Fiona Hill.

  • Russmo
    November 21, 2019 at 1:04 pm

    Ware is a horrible Shit hole
    I love the hairdo on the ape
    Very stylish

  • 2 so far
    November 21, 2019 at 12:52 pm

    Diddlers TB,Kraft.

  • True justice
    November 21, 2019 at 12:22 pm

    Omg, wtf! These trolls are all from the Same town? It’s like the bar scene in Star Wars. I’ve never been to Ware but maybe I’ll take a day trip there for the amusement and the horror. Of course I will wear a full biohazard suit.

    • Obi Wan
      November 21, 2019 at 2:25 pm

      You will never find a more wretched hive of scum, and villainy.

      • Silencio Dogood
        November 22, 2019 at 1:38 am

        well, there is this comment section…

  • massholio
    November 21, 2019 at 12:07 pm

    In the 90’s a guy I knew bought a homecare company. His first act was closing the Ware office.

  • DudeRanchStripClub
    November 21, 2019 at 11:40 am

    HOLD THE PHONE: #freethenipple, My man who Tyson’d some one got his damn teets cropped out, oppressors. He even has the “the fuck you want from me” face, that was the only one I knew for sure.

    Everyone else must just be groypdaddys (I just learned what groyper is, I think)


  • Lee Ho
    November 21, 2019 at 11:34 am

    The crime they committed was being born.

  • Mom's Basement
    November 21, 2019 at 11:23 am

    If there were no middle class baby boomers with finished basements prone to coddling their underachieving late-bloomers then there could be a lot more people like that. Only god can judge.

  • Y
    November 21, 2019 at 10:56 am


    • Y
      November 21, 2019 at 11:07 am

      You’re a cuck. Get a new schtick, you fraud.

    • What a fag
      November 21, 2019 at 12:54 pm

      No one rides his uncle like Y.

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