All-Star Criminals

Webster Guy Whose Psycho GF Tried Cutting His Nuts Off Arrested Alongside Baby Faced Drug Dealer In Charlton Bust, Eliciting Brilliant Facebook Commentary From Free My Boi Patrol

Webster Guy Whose Psycho GF Tried Cutting His Nuts Off Arrested Alongside Baby Faced Drug Dealer In Charlton Bust, Eliciting Brilliant Facebook Commentary From Free My Boi Patrol

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Tell me if you recognize any names of Turtleboy legends in this Charlton PD post……

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No, not the baby faced drug dealer. The other guy who was arrested for possession – Eric Paul. Remember him?

Does This Look Like A Spencer Chick Who Was Arrested For Cutting Her Boyfriend’s Balls In A Sturbridge Motel Room They Were Squatting In?

Oh yea, the guy who got his nuts cut off in a Sturbridge motel room where him and his Turtleboy legend girlfriend Mariah Moriarty were squatting and refused to leave.


His response when the cops found him bleeding from the grundle? “She got me good.” Still one of the greatest comments we’ve ever heard. Poor fucking guy. Can’t catch a break.



Hey, here’s an idea Eric – try to find a new chick. Because nothing good comes from dating a ratchet like this:

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Just sayin. Get rid of her and I bet half your problems start going away.

Naturally in the comments the baby face Tony Montana is getting plenty of free my boi talk, including but not limited to, “he had to sell drugs to pay for college,” (even though he never went to college)

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“You don’t know him so you can’t judge him”

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Because, it’s not like our judicial system is set up so that citizens can make judgements on the guilt of other citizens.

We also had the, “it was just a mistake” crew:

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Because selling drugs and having $46,000 on you is “just a mistake.” Happens to the best of us.

Then there was the “you can’t say mean things about drug dealers because the drug dealer is a friend of mine and/or family”:

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My question is, how do people like this get to live in Charlton? Charlton is a really nice town. I feel like you have to earn your way there, and I’m stuck here in Worcester. Meanwhile the ragtag patrol gets to live the good life in the burbs.

P.S. What an absolute waste of marijuana. That’s the real crime here. That these dolts didn’t have a stash house to protect the product. Rookie Charlton drug dealers at their finest.



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16 Comment(s)
  • Jodi
    February 7, 2017 at 10:26 am

    The fucking problem with people today is lack of parenting and leniency in the law. Lock them the fuck up. Why do they all get millions of chances? Let them spend a year of their youthin HARD LABOR camps for their behaviors. See if that does anything to change things as adults. However, cutting some loser’s nuts off might just be an inevitable solution to some of society’s problems. Sterilization.

  • PleaseGiveMeFreeWeed
    February 6, 2017 at 10:24 pm

    I think the Charlton PD should ‘gift’ that weed to it’s citizens.

  • Slow Apocalypse
    February 6, 2017 at 10:23 pm

    He’s got bigger problems if all that product was maybe not yet paid for maybe the $46k is some one else’s…….

    • Joseph Schmo
      February 7, 2017 at 8:37 am

      Hence the need for “shot spotters”, someone will be missing the ca$h, and someone’s gonna pay. Stay tuned!!!

  • DJ's BobnTurd
    February 6, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    • BobnMic
      February 6, 2017 at 9:10 pm

      Right up Tredge’ alley literally at times.

      • Turd Burglestein
        February 7, 2017 at 11:59 am

        My foot’s gonna go right up that alley sized gaping anus you have there ole bobbie boy. I will literally plant both feet up your ass to my knees and then stomp around that mudhole like I’m planning to make some dingleberry wine.

        You like the sound of that?

  • ZephyrCat
    February 6, 2017 at 6:29 pm

    Yeah, good dude. 46 G’s on him. Never mind that coke fucks up alot of people. Betcha some of that 46 large came outta gramma’s jewelry, or someones mortgage payments. Nah Gabe-faggyboy-Haskins….his heart’s in the right place. How ’bout you, Caitlyn Dildo? I do hope your boy gets his asshole stretched out real wild in prison, so that forever more when he farts, it sounds like the wind blowin’ thru the trees. Yeah, pretty secure in saying he’s a piece of shit.

    • Dorlisa Lachance
      February 11, 2017 at 7:58 pm

      AS ARE YOU! You have no idea. What a tiny little ignorant mind you have, poor,poor, little boy.

  • BobnMic
    February 6, 2017 at 5:34 pm

    I bet he got his coke from Burglestein. I’m on my way to the station now to get a sample. For official purposes of course because I’m now a DEA agent. Sleep with one eye open Turd…or should I say Tredge? You’re going down just like this guy and Turtleboy is gonna write a story about it featuring me as Buford T Justice and then I’ll get invited to host Turtleboy Live and then we’ll see what a smiling piece of shit you really are.

    • BobnMic
      February 6, 2017 at 6:22 pm

      I may even go psycho and cut off your nuts Tredge. Just like the guy in the article. Except instead of scissors, I’m going to use a rusty butter knife to saw your weiner off. I don’t care how long I have to hold your weiner in one hand and saw with the other, I will accomplish this, my new mission in life.


      • BobnMic
        February 6, 2017 at 9:05 pm

        Way to go Fake Fiesty the Frosty. Way to go you immature child. Can’t take defeat like an adult huh? So sad. You really fucking are.

  • Cat Vomit Tango
    February 6, 2017 at 4:38 pm

    I’m withholding judgement until after I see his exclusive interview on WBZ.

  • Lock them up
    February 6, 2017 at 4:29 pm

    Good job to these police departments. These death dealers are low life pieces of shit who only bring crime into our neighborhoods. Drug dealers need to be dealt with harshly by the courts.

    • Massif
      February 10, 2017 at 5:21 pm

      Easy. Maybe you should smoke a joint & calm the f*ck down!

  • MrSmiley
    February 6, 2017 at 3:38 pm

    We all knew it was a matter of time after he made his first appearance here. Enjoy the house of awesome!

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