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Remember two years ago when some West Warwick trashbag Dad named Mel Taylor put a bounty on a hoodrat’s head for allegedly beating the shit out of his innocent 16 year old daughter Ally Tortolani?

Then we got hold of the actual video and it turns out that his princess jumped in the middle of a hoodbooger hodown, started throwing haymakers, and ended up getting knocked the fuck out:

A normal parent would be ashamed to have a slugrake of a daughter representing him like this. Not Mel Taylor though:

He’s proud, AND he’s suing!!

Anyway it’s been a couple years the West Warwick Warthog has been featured on Turtleboy. We almost forgot about her. During this time she’s been freeing a lot of her boys with Facebook posts and perfecting the art of the dog filtered selfie:

Ally came back on our radar today, because she’s 18 now, on parole, and apparently robbing people in marijuana deals gone bad and trying to kill them:

Basically what happened here is that because marijuana is still illegal in this country the girl so Brittany’s friend had to get pot off of these jamokes. They ended up getting robbed and then on the highway Ally Tortolani and her three male companions started heaving bottles at their car, swerving at them, and causing them to crash.

Some have doubted this side of the story. In fairness, it sounds like they got robbed, gave chase, and ended up crashing. But Brittany, who is enrolled in school and seems to have a good head on her shoulders, insists that this was not the case. And quite frankly if I have to pick between believing a 25 year old woman who seems perfectly normal, and this perpetual teen mom candidate, I’m going with the former.

Oh, and Ally posted this right before the crash:

Zannies!! And did we mention she’s on parole? Does this sound like a chick who doesn’t like getting all fucked up and making bad decisions?

Oops!!

Sadly Mel Taylor is not around for our entertainment this time, but Mom sure has a lot to say……

“Throw my daughter onto the bus.” 

Glorious.

I know if my daughter was accused of something like this the first thing I’d do is go on Facebook and verify that my daughter did in fact sell this person weed. Oh, and then I’d accuse the girl of posting fake pictures of her car wreck, even though this is her current condition:

And just in case there was any doubt that the car flipped over Brittany went on Facebook Live today to prove it:

Mom was just getting warmed up though. She then threatened to reveal damning information about the woman her daughter threw bottles at on the highway:

She also posted a picture of what she claimed that Brittany was claiming was her car, as proof that Brittany was a liar:

Except she clearly got that gray car wreck image off of Google, and it still has the watermark on it.

And just in case there was any doubt, Brittany also has screenshots of her conversation with Ally after the accident:

“Then they threw something back.” In other words, she’s admitting that this did indeed happen.

Anyway, it’s really only a matter of time until Ally ends up in jail. Shocking, because she was brought up with such great parents who never, ever made excuse for her ratchet behavior.

Ever.