Smiles And Sunshine

Vote For Which Four Ratchets Should Advance To The Final 4 Of Ratchet Madness

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Welcome back to Turtleboy Ratchet Madness folks. It’s been a while but we’re ready to pick our Final 4. Here’s the results from the last round of voting in the Sweet 16 round of the Chudstuffer Region:

Slavemaster Steve was tough competition. In any other bracket he might’ve been a Final 4 candidate. But not against Didi. Her dominance is unparalleled, and now she’ll be going against Moby Trick.

Time to vote for our final 4……

As usual we’ll give you some ratchet highlights, as well as provide links for each ratchet so you can make an informed decision.

1. Alli Bibaud vs. 7. Lowell Beaver Bumper

Alli Bibaud

  • Has the “disease”
  • Got gigs as a toll booth worker where she filmed herself repeatedly, all fucked up taking people’s money
  • Frequently uses phrases like “money, cash, hoes”
  • Records herself driving around all fucked up
  • Got arrested for driving around all jammed with a bunch of heroin on her on I-190
  • Asked arresting trooper if he knew how many guys she had to blow to get that heroin (still undetermined)
  • Offered sexual favors in return for leniency
  • Mentioned her father during arrest, who is a judge in Dudley
  • Set off a chain of events that led to the resignation of four of the highest ranking members of the Massachusetts State Police, as well as an investigation by the Attorney General’s Office





Lowell Beaver Bumper

  • Killed a dude in broad daylight in the middle of traffic and went home and bragged about it on Facebook
  • Career criminal who has been arrested several times for drugs and gun violations
  • Despite displaying tons of cash she also displays her EBT balance on IG
  • Was featured by the Lowell Sun in an anti-violence video
  • Father came on her Facebook page threatening to murder the families of turtle riders laughing at her

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1. Leigha Genduso vs. 2. Ashley Brady

Leigha Genduso

  • Has tendency to bang older bald men who can get her nice things
  • Sold large amounts of pot wrapped in Christmas paper
  • Hid $275K worth of drug money from the feds by giving it to a lawyer who has been accused of rape by four women
  • Insists she got her job based on merit, told us to “get your facts straight”
  • Straightened facts revealed that she was given the chance to receive immunity by testifying in front of a grand jury and perjured herself anyway
  • Admitted to being pill popping pothead on the stand
  • Still became a state police dispatcher where she shared confidential emails with random people on the Internet
  • On Facebook she made fun of people who she thought were not qualified to be corrections officers
  • Thinks she’s going to get her job back after being checked into a loony bin when we exposed her


Ashley Brady

  • Head of the greatest Facebook cult ever – Moms of the South Shore
  • Used authority to silence all dissenters and make herself the cult leader
  • Forced newer members to pay between $10 and $50 to join her Facebook group
  • Ran fundraisers for other Moms but all money went through her PayPal and she provided no receipts
  • Kicked out anyone who questioned her
  • When she realized Turtleboy was watching she began posting about a mass purge, expelling thousands of women who did not comment enough and kiss her ass
  • Started fundraiser for herself to go to Disney because her very important work running a Facebook group meant she couldn’t get a job
  • Has a picture of herself on top of the throne at her house
  • Has a different pair of LuLaRoe leggings for every day of the month
  • Will banish you from the group if you talk about her choice of leggings on your own Facebook page
  • Might have sent a mole to Turtleboy Sports undercover to find out if we were in her Facebook group
  • Had a strict policy of no solicitation, even for fundraisers for sick kids, but still ran GoFundMe’s for her Disney trips



5. Fall River Dirty Dick Trap Queens vs. 10. West Warwick Trash Princess

Fall River Trap Queen Gladiators

  • Fought not once, not twice, but three separate times over incarcerated, dirty dick, mutual baby Daddy
  • Filmed themselves driving around Fall River on Facebook Live, calling each other out while on the hunt
  • Both bragged about visiting him more recently in prison
  • Both had recently given birth and had kids take by DCF
  • Wrote series of most ghettotastic Facebook posts back and forth calling each other out for being more ratchet
  • Bigger one claimed that thick girls have better pussy
  • Skinny one claimed that she tells baby daddy that this is his pussy during doggystyle
  • Went back and forth with each other on mother’s day, in which neither saw their childre




West Warwick Trash Princess

  • Previously got into fight at Cranston carnival where she was collateral damage, went home, smeared blood on face, claimed she was assaulted by male, trashbag father led campaign to hunt down alleged assailant
  • Did a bunch of acid, posted it on snapchat
  • Set up other girl in marijuana deal
  • Threw objects at car driven by people she just ripped off on highway, leading to major car accident and near death of driver
  • Called out Coventry PD for lying about frequent OD’s
  • Frequent user of dog filters

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1. Didi Delgado vs. 10. Moby Trick

Didi Delgado

  • Forces cult of white women from all over the country to pay her reparations whenever she demands it
  • Doesn’t report any of this income to the IRS but still seems to never have money for rent (which is racist) and still gladly collects food stamps and other handouts from Uncle Sam
  • Takes elaborate vacations all around the world paid for by dumb white women who pay her reparations
  • Forces wypipo to write #DoneForDidi after donating to her so she can keep track of which wypipo have paid up
  • Raised $12,000 for a car, car seat, and $4K worth of car insurance that was delinquent
  • Often posts about who she is offering up some lady bits by saying things such as “everyone knows my pussy is gold”
  • Dresses like 120 pound woman, which is what she weighs on the moon
  • Said she would lead a Nat Turner-esque rebellion on any teacher who attempts to teach her daughter about the Pilgrims
  • Held Facebook Live show announcing identity of her child’s sperm donor
  • Sold tickets to show with strict “no refund” policy even though it was just her driving around in a car talking into her phone




Moby Trick

  • 400 pound (estimated) cheesehog originally spotted in Providence walking around tryig to sell weed to random people in cars while wearing underpants with fupa flowing from shirt that was 4 sizes too small
  • Migrated north to Worcester, wearing different navy blue panties, and was caught walking through Main South with random crackhead who had just purchased her services grabbing large honch of spare cellulite on posterior


You have 48 hours to vote.

10 Comment(s)
  • Some Guy
    April 29, 2018 at 3:08 pm

    It’s going to come down to Leigha and Fatso Didi. You gotta give it to Fatso. Sure Leigha is a fucking turd, but she was enabled on many levels to morph into the shitbag that she is. Fatso Didi, however, is a product of her very own doing. She is as disgusting on the inside as she is on the outside. Sure, Fatso Didi has an army of fuckhead white women giving her money, but they did not make her the miserable fucking racist that she is. She owns that all by herself.

  • Diane Woods emerson
    April 29, 2018 at 10:19 am

    I am still confused who the fuck didi is? I just don’t see how she can be of any relevance anywhere. How does she not offend everyone? I am an oldish lily white chick and there is literally nothing I have seen so far would make me feel compelled to give her anything.

  • Fake Rant Queen
    April 28, 2018 at 1:20 pm

    The REAL behind-the-scenes rachet queen will never show up in this contest… I’m talking about radical leftist Massachusetts Attorney General Maura Healey.

  • TJB
    April 28, 2018 at 9:58 am

    I’m sticking with Didi smellgardo for #1. The main reason being she is the definition of the word racist against straight white men.

    • pro trump
      April 28, 2018 at 5:45 pm

      shes a niggermonkey babboon! lol

    • itsjustme
      April 29, 2018 at 1:13 am

      My guess, the final two will be our favorite white people racist Didi, and our favorite former drug dealing stripper and former state police officer Leigha. It will be VERY hard to pick between those two.

  • Clitty Litter
    April 28, 2018 at 7:37 am

    It’s like voting for your favorite M+M.
    They’re all the same on the inside and only differ by appearance on the outside.
    Probably the hardest, most thought producing thing I’ll do all weekend.
    (* at least it done early)

  • Rever Forever
    April 28, 2018 at 1:28 am

    How the fuck can people vote a fat scounge over the Revere Pussy popping drug dealing dido swinging money making queen? That’s farked up.

  • Kevin lynch
    April 27, 2018 at 11:32 pm

    I am making one more offer to the. I call for a truce under the condition that you run a true story aboutthe fitchburg case. You expose the corruption that put Dave and I in the Whoc in 2011. You tell the full story.

  • MrSmiley
    April 27, 2018 at 10:59 pm

    Leigha for the win. From moving pounds to arresting for them. It’s the ultimate ratchet success story and therefore should be internet famous for life.

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